Totesgoats11 Posted March 24, 2021 Share Posted March 24, 2021 I’m seeing a guy who was an old friend. He hit me up about some mutual art things I had posted about. I was casually seeing someone else before he came along. I’d always had a bit of a crush on this guy so I was really excited to hear from him. He asked me out and I was immediately honest about the other guy, it didn’t seem to bother him. Went out and it was super lovely, he kissed me before we left. He asked me out again a couple of days later, and then again. It’s been about a month of seeing each other, I told him I want to take things slow and he has seemed super keen (looking back tho I kept making jokes to him that we were just friends nothing more, he seemed kinda bothered). In fact the last time I saw him I mentioned I was grateful that he hasn’t pushed to have sex yet and all he said was “you set the pace for this”. The thing that is stressing me out is things have suddenly got awkward. Ever since we started talking he has been sparatic at texting, so consistently sparatic that it didn’t bother me. He has always been so keen to hangout regardless. However since the last time we hung out he has almost completely stopped messaging me, he texted me last week asking to see me again and I agreed but then yesterday cancelled on me! He did try and reschedule but I was busy. I just casually told him maybe another time and he has not followed up. I’m happy to admit maybe I have given mixed signals. I like him though and I don’t know how to fix the awkwardness that has grown between us. I’ve messaged him first a couple of times and he seems not as responsive to what he was. Should I cut my losses and assume he is not interested, wait for him to message me back at some point or just hit him up myself in a couple of days? Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted March 24, 2021 Share Posted March 24, 2021 (edited) 1 hour ago, Totesgoats11 said: I was immediately honest about the other guy, I kept making jokes to him that we were just friends nothing more, Unfortunately it seems he was interested in more than friendship but just gave up on the idea. Let the dust settle and see if he contacts you. He may be seeing others, like you are. Do you want to be friends or date? That point seems very confusing. Edited March 24, 2021 by Wiseman2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 24, 2021 Share Posted March 24, 2021 4 hours ago, Totesgoats11 said: Should I cut my losses and assume he is not interested, wait for him to message me back at some point or just hit him up myself in a couple of days? Where in there do you get not interested? He's willing to go at your pace. You send mixed message but he sticks around. You play games about who is texting first &want to wait days to reach out. When you can't make an alternate time you conclude he's not interested? At this point it's on you to offer a new time / plan . I could completely understand if he was wondering if you were into him. You are all over the place. But I really don't get where your doubts are coming from. This man seems to be very accommodating even if he's not a prolific texter. YOU are blowing this, not him. So if you want to see him, reach out. If you don't reach out, own the fact that your equivocation caused the problems. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted March 25, 2021 Share Posted March 25, 2021 (edited) You told him 1) you're seeing someone else and 2) you pretty much have him in the friend zone. He'd be a fool to consider you a serious option, especially if he's interested in a relationship and not a casual fling. I think you should learn from this and move on. Edited March 25, 2021 by GeorgiaPeach1 3 Link to post Share on other sites
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