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Guys, what makes you think that a girl only likes you as a friend?

MeadowFlower

By MeadowFlower
in Friends and Lovers

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MeadowFlower Established Member

MeadowFlower

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Just a quick question. Guys, what makes you think that a girl only likes you as a friend? (Besides the obvious scenario where you ask her out and she says no and that she likes you just as a friend.) What are things that she does/says that leads you to believe she doesn't like you in a special way? Even if you may be wrong in your assumption. What gets you thinking this way? 

Please give your perspectives and examples on this, if you will. 

Wiseman2 Established Member

Wiseman2

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No movement toward affection/intimacy. It's that simple.

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Fletch Lives Established Member

Fletch Lives

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Yup. If they don't want to kiss, it's going to be just friends. Which is fine.

You can only have one lover but you can't have too many friends!

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dramafreezone Established Member

dramafreezone

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14 hours ago, MeadowFlower said:

Just a quick question. Guys, what makes you think that a girl only likes you as a friend? (Besides the obvious scenario where you ask her out and she says no and that she likes you just as a friend.) What are things that she does/says that leads you to believe she doesn't like you in a special way? Even if you may be wrong in your assumption. What gets you thinking this way? 

Please give your perspectives and examples on this, if you will. 

If you ask her out and she gives every excuse as to why she can't, then she doesn't like you in that way.  That's the biggest one, as someone else above mentioned, she doesn't demonstrate a desire to progress things romantically.  When interested women like you, they make it easy for you to ask and take them out.

Anyone can have a legitimate excuse as to why they can't go out.  We all have lives and can't just drop plans to go out with someone, but one way to determine interest is to see if they offer to reschedule.  If she gives an excuse and doesn't give a counter-offer, then she couldn't care less if you ever go out together.

Ultimately though, it's not something that she does, it's what she doesn't do.  Women that like you are generally going to be really curious about your life.  They'll indirectly express to you that they could see themselves in your life.  One that I caught on to early on is when a woman asks you what you're doing this weekend.  You tell her and she says "oh wow that sounds fun, I love doing that." 

That said, even women that agree to go out with you aren't always into you.  When you ask them out and they say yes, judge their enthusiasm leading up to the date.  If she's texting a lot beforehand and saying she's looking forward to the date and thinks it will be fun, very good sign.

Before the "All police" show up, I want to make clear that there are no signs that are 100% reliable by themselves.  There are some women that act as if they like you.  They call, text, but when it's time to go out they never can for some reason.  These ones are the worst, they love the free attention and will take as much as they can get without actually going out with you.  So don't confuse her contacting you consistently with romantic interest. 

Similarly, there are some that will go out with you, know that you like them, but have no intention of progressing anything with you.  These are selfish people that are going out simply because it's better than looking at the four walls at home.   You have to be aware of how things are going at every level to make sure you have an interested dater.  First you have to ask her out, and then after that judge her response leading up to the date, then how she behaves on the date.  Basically, don't take any single sign as indicators of romantic interest.  It's more of the more signs you see, the better.

Edited by dramafreezone
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Johnjohnson2017 Established Member

Johnjohnson2017

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-She avoids long eye contact

-She doesn't initiate texts/calls

-Avoids touching you, moves away when you lean in.

-Talks about her dates/love interests

-Insists on paying her own meal/expenses. Is uncomfortable allowing you to pay.

-Only meets you in a group. Invites other friend when you go out together.

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cbr600r Member

cbr600r

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On 3/24/2021 at 12:17 AM, Johnjohnson2017 said:

-She avoids long eye contact

-She doesn't initiate texts/calls

-Avoids touching you, moves away when you lean in.

-Talks about her dates/love interests

-Insists on paying her own meal/expenses. Is uncomfortable allowing you to pay.

-Only meets you in a group. Invites other friend when you go out together.

All of these. Basically, she doesn't do any of the things normally associated with showing interest. Makes no attempt to flirt or touch you. 

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MeadowFlower Established Member

MeadowFlower

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On 4/1/2021 at 3:34 AM, cbr600r said:

 Makes no attempt to flirt or touch you. 

So if she doesn't flirt that would make a guy think she isn't interested? 

Trail Blazer Established Member

Trail Blazer

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16 minutes ago, MeadowFlower said:

So if she doesn't flirt that would make a guy think she isn't interested? 

Definitely. 

In my experience, women make it obvious that they're interested in order to prompt a guy to make the first move.  Doing things like flicking hair back, giggling or excessive eye contact.

Some women will even make the first move if they think that you're keen (or not 🤣) but you're taking too long to get the hint or seize the opportunity that presents.

Women who just like you as a friend will talk more generally about things, but do so in a way that is more matter of fact.  There will be less interpersonal expressive emotions.

 

dramafreezone Established Member

dramafreezone

Posted
Posted (edited)
48 minutes ago, MeadowFlower said:

So if she doesn't flirt that would make a guy think she isn't interested? 

So if a woman doesn't even flirt, how is she participating in the courtship?

[redacted] She has to give him something.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
rude
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MeadowFlower Established Member

MeadowFlower

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2 hours ago, Trail Blazer said:

Women who just like you as a friend will talk more generally about things, but do so in a way that is more matter of fact.  There will be less interpersonal expressive emotions.

Well guess I don't always fit that mould... I can be interested in the guy even if my 'flirting' is minimal. 

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Trail Blazer Established Member

Trail Blazer

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19 hours ago, MeadowFlower said:

Well guess I don't always fit that mould... I can be interested in the guy even if my 'flirting' is minimal. 

I'm sure that is the case frequently.  However, as a guy, it's hard to really guage a woman's interest if she's keeping all of her cards to her chest.

What else might you do, besides flirting, that will give a guy the green light to go ahead and pursue you?  Some guys don't wish to look like a fool making unwanted advances.

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MeadowFlower Established Member

MeadowFlower

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7 hours ago, Trail Blazer said:

However, as a guy, it's hard to really guage a woman's interest if she's keeping all of her cards to her chest.

Guess the same goes for the other way around. Unless it's spelt out to me, I may doubt the clues. 

7 hours ago, Trail Blazer said:

What else might you do, besides flirting, that will give a guy the green light to go ahead and pursue you?  Some guys don't wish to look like a fool making unwanted advances.

Be his friend. Be responsive to his communication. 

Wiseman2 Established Member

Wiseman2

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Posted

Friendzone behaviors. Talks to me the way she would with her girlfriends.

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