allaboutchoices Posted October 15, 2005 Posted October 15, 2005 Hey guys! Let's devote this thread to everyone who is doing NC and all issues that come with it; the pain, relapse, down days, progresses...anything and everything. My NC lasted a week. We had some issues that needed to be resolved and saw each other. We haven't talked about NC this time, so I guess we will see. I don't feel pain when we see each other, so who knows? How are you doing?
reader Posted October 15, 2005 Posted October 15, 2005 He told me this week that I can't call him because his ex fiance will freak out, but he will call me. I would like to send an email letting him know that perhaps he needs to concentrate on his ex...( a nice way of saying leave me alone), but everyone says just let it go, he'll figure it out the next time he dangles a carrot and I don't bite. The problem is that I'm strong on the weekends, but not during the week when I see him and my defenses are down. They are not down now, and I need advice - send the email or not? and if Not, why not? reader
JohnJohn Posted October 15, 2005 Posted October 15, 2005 I'm just about to 2 months with NC with my ex. I have up and down days and often fight the urge to call or email her, but I refrain. I remind myself of why I am not with her anymore and then that urge subsides. Weekends are always tougher than weekdays. I wish I could go a day without thinking about it at all but at least the heartache is gone and I function normally again, unlike in the early stages of it. Best of luck.
Author allaboutchoices Posted October 15, 2005 Author Posted October 15, 2005 If you are serious about ending it with him, send the email. You will prevent your self from future temptings when he calls. Explain that you don't want to be the 2nd banana and that you are out of his life. If you are not sure and are willing to wait around, then I don't know what to tell you. Good Luck:)
reader Posted October 15, 2005 Posted October 15, 2005 I don't need to wait around, and I'm strong now. I have the email. Tell me what you think. Hey ****, Just thinking about things this weekend…I’m getting ready to go out soon. I hope things are going better with ****. Perhaps you better not call me, I would not want to make your situation worse by her thinking I am anything but a friend. Things will work out for the best. Good luck! Have a great week. I’m here if you ever need to talk.
Author allaboutchoices Posted October 15, 2005 Author Posted October 15, 2005 Sounds to me like you are still leaving your options open. I would just tell him to have a happy life. I'm not in your situation and know very little about it though, so use your judgment and common sense, you are the only one knowing what you really want out of this guy. Good luck!
pippen_2k Posted October 15, 2005 Posted October 15, 2005 well that email is inviting contact, especially when you say 'Im here if you ever need to talk'...contradicting NC.. If you feel strong and are no longer heart broken then send it, but if your still struggling you may as well end the email like this.. " Have a great week, and never contact me again " Good Luck.
reader Posted October 16, 2005 Posted October 16, 2005 Trust me, he knows perfectly well, "I'm here if you ever...", means I'm moving on and I'm not carrying the weight of this weird game anymore. I sent it about an hour ago, feel good, and want to think about my own life and how I can make it better. Thanks for the input. reader
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