Author Britney25 Posted February 13, 2021 Author Posted February 13, 2021 4 minutes ago, Gaeta said: Sorry, you had a date Thursday and he text you Friday. You initiate a text today or tomorrow. Offer a date Monday or Tuesday What the heck? I offer a date ? In other words I pay for the date? Um hell no. Not my style. If we will be exclusive then yes great but this early??
Author Britney25 Posted February 13, 2021 Author Posted February 13, 2021 11 minutes ago, smackie9 said: Why not suggest a date yourself. What do you mean? Ask him out? As in I pay?
Author Britney25 Posted February 13, 2021 Author Posted February 13, 2021 8 minutes ago, Gaeta said: Sorry, you had a date Thursday and he text you Friday. You initiate a text today or tomorrow. Offer a date Monday or Tuesday But you said dont initiate this weekend..plus tomorrow is valentines day.
Gaeta Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 @Britney25: Under what rock have you been hiding the past 20 years? Yes women offer and pay for the date, usually on the 3rd one. 4
smackie9 Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 (edited) It doesn't have to involve paying for anything. You can suggest going out for a walk and maybe buy a coffee....if you choose to offer. Valentines day....let it go. Too early to expect anything. Edited February 13, 2021 by smackie9 3
Gaeta Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 Just now, Britney25 said: But you said dont initiate this weekend..plus tomorrow is valentines day. I was under the impression your date was Friday. That is why I said wait Monday/Tuesday. Forgot about Valentine's day, I'm single now it skipped my mind. Don't initiate on V day. 1
smackie9 Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 I think V day is why things have gone silent. He will probably wait til sometime next week to contact you. He's just laying low. 1
Author Britney25 Posted February 13, 2021 Author Posted February 13, 2021 9 minutes ago, smackie9 said: I think V day is why things have gone silent. He will probably wait til sometime next week to contact you. He's just laying low. Yeah that's what I think too
Author Britney25 Posted February 13, 2021 Author Posted February 13, 2021 21 minutes ago, Gaeta said: @Britney25: Under what rock have you been hiding the past 20 years? Yes women offer and pay for the date, usually on the 3rd one. Well I don't mind offering but the Man never let's me pay.
Gaeta Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 If you invite, you pay. If he wants to grab the bill at the end then let him, but the point is to show him you are interested in him for other thing than his wallet. Like Smackie said you don't have to spend a lot, make it a coffee & cake kind of place or a walk in the part. I don't know where you're located and what's available to you at this time.
Lotsgoingon Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 (edited) Here's the deal: these things take care of themselves if you're clicking with someone. Sure, we're all a little unique in our texting style and all of that. The important point is he did not ask you out again. That's significant and usually a sign that he's not interested in seeing you again. Here's another indicator: after the first two dates, did he enthusiastically text you to say he had a fabulous time--a great time!!!-- and that he really looked forward to seeing you soon? If he did not say he had a great time, he's really not interested. You're trying to identify the etiquette here and that makes sense. But in my experience, the etiquette takes care of itself when two people are genuinely interested in each other. What you're screwing up is not recognizing the signs of disinterest. He's apparently given you two big signs that he's not interested. You want to start noticing those signs. BTW: are you sure that YOU are interested in him? Lots of people just go numb and don't ask themselves if they REALLY want to see someone again. I'm not actually sensing overwhelming enthusiasm on your part. Translation: doesn't sound like you're interested in him either. Edited February 13, 2021 by Lotsgoingon 2
Gaeta Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 She rejected that man initially and he came back and risk rejection to get a 2nd date with her. He is interested. I think he did not ask for a 3rd date at the end of 2nd date because he doesn't want to appear too eager and chase her away again. Also, a lot of dating advice to men out there suggest to not show too much interest by asking another date right there on the spot. 1
poppyfields Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 (edited) 21 minutes ago, Gaeta said: Also, a lot of dating advice to men out there suggest to not show too much interest by asking another date right there on the spot. It's been two days and he hasn't even mentioned a third date. All the dating advice for both men and women circulating out there is why things can get so screwed up. Men are advised not to chase, to come forward indicating interest, then a gentle push back to see if she moves forward and initiates, indicating her interest. Which he may be doing. And women are advised to let the man do all the pursuing during the early stages, to prove his interest, which is what Britney is doing. All these shyt tests and games aren't getting anyone anywhere, something's got to give! Yes he chased and B rejected. But she's not rejecting anymore. So it's possible now that she's responding and accepting dates, he's lost some interest. He was all about the chase. There are men like this. Britney, I'm sorry I have no idea what the answer is. If me, and I really liked him, like REALLY liked him, I'd text him after V-Day. I'd still let him suggest going out again, but I'd text him. Edited February 13, 2021 by poppyfields 1
winny Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 1 hour ago, Britney25 said: What the heck? I offer a date ? In other words I pay for the date? Um hell no. Not my style. If we will be exclusive then yes great but this early?? You have some really weird beliefs when it comes to dating. 2
Author Britney25 Posted February 13, 2021 Author Posted February 13, 2021 36 minutes ago, Lotsgoingon said: Here's the deal: these things take care of themselves if you're clicking with someone. Sure, we're all a little unique in our texting style and all of that. The important point is he did not ask you out again. That's significant and usually a sign that he's not interested in seeing you again. Here's another indicator: after the first two dates, did he enthusiastically text you to say he had a fabulous time--a great time!!!-- and that he really looked forward to seeing you soon? If he did not say he had a great time, he's really not interested. You're trying to identify the etiquette here and that makes sense. But in my experience, the etiquette takes care of itself when two people are genuinely interested in each other. What you're screwing up is not recognizing the signs of disinterest. He's apparently given you two big signs that he's not interested. You want to start noticing those signs. BTW: are you sure that YOU are interested in him? Lots of people just go numb and don't ask themselves if they REALLY want to see someone again. I'm not actually sensing overwhelming enthusiasm on your part. Translation: doesn't sound like you're interested in him either. He told me at the date he wants to see me again, then next day he asked me how was my day and texted me goodnight with a kiss.
winny Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 So he texted yesterday and hasn’t texted today. Calm down. Wait for few more days.. at least till Tuesday. And then you can text him and see if he responds. See if he sounds excited to hear from you.. does he joke, flirt, compliment you.. then you can initiate a date. If he sounds dull then don’t initiate anything. if he texts by Tuesday then also check what I said before... 2
Author Britney25 Posted February 13, 2021 Author Posted February 13, 2021 20 minutes ago, poppyfields said: It's been two days and he hasn't even mentioned a third date. All the dating advice for both men and women circulating out there is why things can get so screwed up. Men are advised not to chase, to come forward indicating interest, then a gentle push back to see if she moves forward and initiates, indicating her interest. Which he may be doing. And women are advised to let the man do all the pursuing during the early stages, to prove his interest, which is what Britney is doing. All these shyt tests and games aren't getting anyone anywhere, something's got to give! Yes he chased and B rejected. But she's not rejecting anymore. So it's possible now that she's responding and accepting dates, he's lost some interest. He was all about the chase. There are men like this. Britney, I'm sorry I have no idea what the answer is. If me, and I really liked him, like REALLY liked him, I'd text him after V-Day. I'd still let him suggest going out again, but I'd text him. Yes I'm confused why he isnt asking for a third date. On the date he said we need to do this again, after the date he texted me. The next day he texted me how my day was and a goodnight text but no mention on meeting again. I'm kinda thinking because its V day tomorrow maybe that's why?
Author Britney25 Posted February 13, 2021 Author Posted February 13, 2021 45 minutes ago, Gaeta said: She rejected that man initially and he came back and risk rejection to get a 2nd date with her. He is interested. I think he did not ask for a 3rd date at the end of 2nd date because he doesn't want to appear too eager and chase her away again. Also, a lot of dating advice to men out there suggest to not show too much interest by asking another date right there on the spot. But he did mention another date. He said we should do this again even thou no definite plan was made. Does it still count?
Gaeta Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 You had a date on Thursday. To me it was too last minute to ask you right there for your Saturday night. He text you Friday, he's looking forward to seeing you again. He's doing ok. I agree with @winny. The guy doesn't read your mind he's just following his instinct. There is no need for daily texting here. Not yet. 1
Author Britney25 Posted February 13, 2021 Author Posted February 13, 2021 6 minutes ago, Gaeta said: You had a date on Thursday. To me it was too last minute to ask you right there for your Saturday night. He text you Friday, he's looking forward to seeing you again. He's doing ok. I agree with @winny. The guy doesn't read your mind he's just following his instinct. There is no need for daily texting here. Not yet. No sorry he told me he wants to do this again in person. After the date he texted me goodnight with a kiss. The next day he texted me how was your day and after my reply he said how his day went and texted goodnight with a kiss again. So why no mention yet of another meet up?
winny Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 2 minutes ago, Britney25 said: No sorry he told me he wants to do this again in person. After the date he texted me goodnight with a kiss. The next day he texted me how was your day and after my reply he said how his day went and texted goodnight with a kiss again. So why no mention yet of another meet up? Only he knows the answer to that question.
Author Britney25 Posted February 13, 2021 Author Posted February 13, 2021 1 minute ago, winny said: Only he knows the answer to that question. But it's still a good thing he has been contacting me everyday?
winny Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 Are you dating for the first time in life? He will do what he thinks.. not according to what you think. He may ask you out tomorrow, next week or next month. Completely up to him and there is nothing wrong with it. You are expecting him to move according to your expectations and wishes. Sorry but right now you should have zero expectations. If what he does is not meeting your needs, you are completely free to stop communicating with him and find someone else that better suits you.
Gaeta Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 (edited) 8 minutes ago, Britney25 said: So why no mention yet of another meet up? Because people don't set up dates 7-9 days ahead maybe? I am not sure why. When I was dating men never set up the next date at the end of a current date. They would ask again a few days before their free time, like on Monday they'd ask for Wednesday or Thursday they'd ask for Saturday type of thing. Edited February 13, 2021 by Gaeta 1
winny Posted February 13, 2021 Posted February 13, 2021 2 minutes ago, Britney25 said: But it's still a good thing he has been contacting me everyday? No one can say that.. its been what.. 2 dates? Too early to conclude which behavior is good or bad. If I were in your place.. I would be minding my own business and doing my own thing at this point.. not over analyzing his texts. If he asks again great..! If not.. great..! Also I wouldn’t think so much.. if I feel like inviting him to a date.. i would.. if he shows up great.. if not then wayy too many fishes in the sea! LOL 1
Recommended Posts