Author Britney25 Posted February 16, 2021 Author Posted February 16, 2021 5 minutes ago, Gaeta said: So you did not get back to him immediately but he has to? Britney: You don't want to act like an organized woman but you expect organization? An organized woman would have said to him on Sunday during your exchange and he expressed wanting to see you : Sounds great X, I have free time Next Saturday from 6pm, how is that to you? But you don't want to do that, you don't want to manage your time, you leave it to him and look what it does. I meant yesterday I did get back to him telling him I'm free for the weekend.
Author Britney25 Posted February 16, 2021 Author Posted February 16, 2021 3 minutes ago, poppyfields said: He is also showing her how he communicates, which imo is quite poorly and certainly not reflective of a man who is interested in building a connection and eventually a relationship. Britney, there is no reason on god's green earth why he cannot respond to your text message yesterday. I find the fact he hasn't quite rude. Even if he doesn't know when exactly he's available, he could at least have the courtesy to respond back, perhaps strike up a bit of conversation with you, indicating his interest. There was another poster on this thread (I don't think I am allowed to give names) who has posted previously that an interested man can take five minutes out of his busy day to respond to a text, even if while sitting on the toilet!! I have no problem with taking things slow, but good grief, has there been any sort of substantive communication between you since your date last Thursday? I mean besides an "Happy V-Day love" two hours before the day ended, a "like" on one of your SM posts, and then a lame "let's get together again"? By your own admission, you're not even sure you are all that interested in him anyway, so if I may ask, why bother? My guess, and it's only a guess, is he's playing some sort of game wherein he wants you to chase. Schedule and plan the third date. There is advice to men all over the internet about this. I have nothing against doing that, had I been really interested and gave me more than breakcrumbs. This man has got you on the edge of your seat Britney, I am sorry to have to disagree with the majority but I say since you were never all that interested in the first place, it's not worth it, toss this one back. I would. Yes exactly. If I didnt react to his facebook stories he probably wouldn't even have texted me that day. He messaged me : how was your weekend love? Happy Valentine's day with 2 kisses. I have been busy at work and am tired." I replied to him and then he messaged me when I was already asleep : let's get together again" i replied the next day with yes would love to. I'm free this weekend. He liked my message within a minute of receiving it. I though he will get back to me but he didnt. Today he is still silent. There is no excuse that he couldn't even day that the weekend doesnt work for me and suggest some other day next week. Ugh yes this guy is definitely not for me.
Gaeta Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 5 minutes ago, poppyfields said: There was another poster on this thread (I don't think I am allowed to give names) who has posted previously that an interested man can take five minutes out of his busy day to respond to a text, even if while sitting on the toilet!! I know I said that funny girl 2
Author Britney25 Posted February 16, 2021 Author Posted February 16, 2021 Just now, Gaeta said: I know I said that funny girl Exactly. So don't tell me he wanted me to suggest the third date? Me telling him I'm free the weekend should have been enough for him to tell me yes or no.
Gaeta Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 1 minute ago, Britney25 said: He messaged me : how was your weekend love? That I hate. I find this so condescending from a man you had 2 dates with. 3
basil67 Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 1 minute ago, Gaeta said: That I hate. I find this so condescending from a man you had 2 dates with. If he from certain parts of Britain, it would be a turn of phrase, not a term of endearment. (allowing for cultural differences)
poppyfields Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 (edited) 12 minutes ago, Gaeta said: I know I said that funny girl I know, I didn't think I was allowed to reference other posters, but since you did, hopefully it's all cool with the mods. 10 minutes ago, Gaeta said: That I hate. I find this so condescending from a man you had 2 dates with. Same! I didn't want to say anything but it sounds so "playerish." Honestly Brit, I will reiterate what I said the other day, this guy has got some sort of agenda, if you're up to trying to figure out what that is, go for it. If me, assuming like you, I wasn't all that interested to begin with, I wouldn't bother, and it would actually give me great pleasure not to bother!! Edited February 16, 2021 by poppyfields 2
Gaeta Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 5 minutes ago, Britney25 said: Exactly. So don't tell me he wanted me to suggest the third date? Me telling him I'm free the weekend should have been enough for him to tell me yes or no. Ok, he's gonna have to do more for me to stay on his side. 1
poppyfields Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 Just now, basil67 said: If he from certain parts of Britain, it would be a turn of phrase, not a term of endearment. (allowing for cultural differences) That is true! Britney, is the guy British? I might actually forgive his lameness if he is! Kidding. 1
basil67 Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 5 minutes ago, Britney25 said: Exactly. So don't tell me he wanted me to suggest the third date? Me telling him I'm free the weekend should have been enough for him to tell me yes or no. Again, you can't change him. What can YOU do differently? Suggestion 1. find a man who suits your dating style Suggestion 2. If you really do like him, when suggesting the weekend, suggest an actual day and time and ask if it suits him. If he doesn't respond to that, see suggestion 1. 1
Author Britney25 Posted February 16, 2021 Author Posted February 16, 2021 2 minutes ago, basil67 said: If he from certain parts of Britain, it would be a turn of phrase, not a term of endearment. (allowing for cultural differences) No he is italian half american
Gaeta Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 I think OP is European, she said she has a hard time adjusting to American dating. 1
poppyfields Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 (edited) 21 minutes ago, Britney25 said: So don't tell me he wanted me to suggest the third date? Me telling him I'm free the weekend should have been enough for him to tell me yes or no. Oh I think it's quite possible he's wanting you to suggest the third date Brit, it's a game, a shyt test to get you to comply, read the internet!! My understanding is it's done to test how high your interest level is. If you comply to the test and schedule the date, your interest is high. If you don't it's low. I typically flunked these tests for whatever that's worth, not because I wasn't interested, but because I don't relish being manipulated. I agree with you, a truly interested secure man would have jumped on your saying you were free this weekend and scheduled a date. Edited February 16, 2021 by poppyfields
Gaeta Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 1 minute ago, Britney25 said: No he is italian half american That half of him should be alll over you 1
Author Britney25 Posted February 16, 2021 Author Posted February 16, 2021 1 minute ago, Gaeta said: I think OP is European, she said she has a hard time adjusting to American dating. Yes I am European. I am from Russia. So why is he calling me love this early?
Author Britney25 Posted February 16, 2021 Author Posted February 16, 2021 2 minutes ago, poppyfields said: Oh I think it's quite possible he's wanting you to suggest the third date Brit, it's a game, a shyt test to get you to comply, read the internet!! Nope I'm not going to do it.
sushiandtacos Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 9 minutes ago, Gaeta said: That I hate. I find this so condescending from a man you had 2 dates with. I totally agree, kinda weird and sounds like a player (or wannabe lol). 1
basil67 Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 Just now, Britney25 said: Yes I am European. I am from Russia. So why is he calling me love this early? Don't take it literally. It could be the way he speaks in general. 1
Author Britney25 Posted February 16, 2021 Author Posted February 16, 2021 5 minutes ago, poppyfields said: I know, I didn't think I was allowed to reference other posters, but since you did, hopefully it's all cool with the mods. Same! I didn't want to say anything but it sounds so "playerish." Honestly Brit, I will reiterate what I said the other day, this guy has got some sort of agenda, if you're up to trying to figure out what that is, go for it. If me, I wouldn't bother, and it would actually give me great joy not to bother!! Yes most likely he is a player. This isn't normal.
basil67 Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 1 minute ago, Britney25 said: Nope I'm not going to do it. So, block him and move on. He's never going to be the guy you want him to be. 1
Gaeta Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 Next time he text tell him Sorry I met someone with more enthusiasm. 3
Author Britney25 Posted February 16, 2021 Author Posted February 16, 2021 2 minutes ago, sushiandtacos said: I totally agree, kinda weird and sounds like a player (or wannabe lol). Well he did mention on the second date that I should check out his apartment. That I'm invited over to his place. I thought that was odd this early.
sushiandtacos Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 If it's a language thing and not used as a term of endearment then that's one thing. But generally Britney, the way a guy talks to you, especially in the beginning, foreshadows how he will treat you for the most part. Once dated a guy who called me "babe/honey/love/boo" after 2 dates and he turned out to be a huge player/f*ckboy. This isn't always the case, but a lot of the times it's a reflection on the guy. 1
Author Britney25 Posted February 16, 2021 Author Posted February 16, 2021 Just now, Gaeta said: Next time he text tell him Sorry I met someone with more enthusiasm. On the second date he did mention that I should check out his place. That he has a great view. I'm invited. I thought that was odd this early.
Gaeta Posted February 16, 2021 Posted February 16, 2021 3 minutes ago, Britney25 said: Well he did mention on the second date that I should check out his apartment. That I'm invited over to his place. I thought that was odd this early. player... 1
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