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Posted (edited)

I have friend he[21] has feeling over lady lecture in Uni twice divorce, current age 40-42.

Our gang (including me also), think this guy has mental issue..

Or if not? Is this type love exist really?

Edited by MihiranCG
Posted

France President and First Lady are an example of such love existing

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Posted

Oh my god, 40-42 is an old lady?  😬

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Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, ShyViolet said:

Oh my god, 40-42 is an old lady?  😬

Haha.

What is this, Harold and Maude?

Edited by Alpaca
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Posted
3 hours ago, MihiranCG said:

I have friend he[21] has feeling over lady lecture in Uni twice divorce, current age 40-42.

Our gang (including me also), think this guy has mental issue..

Or if not? Is this type love exist really?

It can happen, but it's not common. 

There's a reason why you almost never see such a large age-gap relationship between a 20-year-old and a 40-year-old. Two very different life stages. It doesn't mean he's mentally ill; I don't know how you've reached that conclusion. He's a young, immature guy with a crush. 

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Posted

I think what he may be feeling is lust, not love.

But... I don't think there's a problem here. Everyone is attracted to different kinds of people, so if he is someone who is attracted to women 20 years older than him, then so be it. I mean, considering women sometimes date men 20 years older, why can't it work the other way?

Calling him mentally ill is unkind and not really fair.

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Posted
9 hours ago, MihiranCG said:

I have friend he[21] has feeling over lady lecture in Uni twice divorce, current age 40-42

Your friend can have a crush on a teacher. It's very common. In fact those types of crushes often happen in grade school. 

You and your gang should not care about this. So what if he thinks the teacher is hot? You probably do too, no?

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Posted
19 hours ago, ShyViolet said:

Oh my god, 40-42 is an old lady?  😬

She looks like age 40's, but certainly she beyond  50's or at the ends of 40's..

Posted
2 hours ago, MihiranCG said:

She looks like age 40's, but certainly she beyond  50's or at the ends of 40's..

Anyways its none of your business to poke your nose into your friend’s love life. 

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Posted

Secret love, those days only telling among us!! How he feels . 

We wondered, why this boy only for her.!

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Posted
17 hours ago, snowboy91 said:

I think what he may be feeling is lust, not love.

But... I don't think there's a problem here. Everyone is attracted to different kinds of people, so if he is someone who is attracted to women 20 years older than him, then so be it. I mean, considering women sometimes date men 20 years older, why can't it work the other way?

Calling him mentally ill is unkind and not really fair.

I think it's not lust. I can't explain in words, what he shared how he feels her among us.

But if you were there definitely you feel same " that's not lust".

Why we wondered this, he knew he can't reach her easily as romeo  ( student and a lecture )

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Posted
14 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

Your friend can have a crush on a teacher. It's very common. In fact those types of crushes often happen in grade school. 

You and your gang should not care about this. So what if he thinks the teacher is hot? You probably do too, no?

That's not Lust, that's not HOT..

Then what? 

Posted (edited)

why not? if 50 year old men date 23 year old women, why can't it be socially acceptable if a 40 year old women be with a 20 year old young stud ?

Edited by Katkats7777
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Posted (edited)

I think that it's entirely possible that he is indeed attracted to her.  Let's face it there are some EXTREMELY alluring women in their 40s.  I can certainly attest to the fact that OLDER women LIKE younger men as well.  It goes both ways.  OP, if your friend is happy don't judge but rather support him.

Edited by StrongHands
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Posted (edited)
On 2/8/2021 at 3:29 AM, MihiranCG said:

I have friend he[21] has feeling over lady lecture in Uni twice divorce, current age 40-42.

Our gang (including me also), think this guy has mental issue..

Or if not? Is this type love exist really?

Course it can happen.

Hello! Nicole Scherzinger? Shes in her early 40s and everyone  fancies her 😂

Don't be judgemental. 

Edited by peach302
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Posted
2 hours ago, MihiranCG said:

That's not Lust, that's not HOT..

Then what? 

Perhaps it's the language barrier but "crush" is neither lust nor love. He's simply thinks he likes her.

However there's no relationship going on. If you and t your fellow 20 year old friends don't see the attraction, who cares? So what?

Posted

If it's one-sided (which it most likely is), it's a crush.

If she's the one marking his exam and has a moral compass, it'll remain one-sided at least until the uni year ends, ideally until Romeo here graduates. By then he'll have moved on, as he should.

Though it happens, it's actually really rare in normal life for a relationship to develop between a student and their lecturer; that's why they make films out of these things.

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Posted
6 hours ago, littleblackheart said:

If it's one-sided (which it most likely is), it's a crush.

If she's the one marking his exam and has a moral compass, it'll remain one-sided at least until the uni year ends, ideally until Romeo here graduates. By then he'll have moved on, as he should.

Though it happens, it's actually really rare in normal life for a relationship to develop between a student and their lecturer; that's why they make films out of these things.

Great Post LBH.  Infatuation, crush, or adoration might be more along the lines of what the OP's friend is experiencing.  Like I previously mentioned, it definitely goes both ways but what I have noticed as far as the OLDER women's actions towards younger men is that they are extremely BOLD in terms of letting them know how interested they are (personal perspective).

Posted

I need to call the old lady. Thank you for reminding me.

Posted (edited)

As an older woman, and having been on dating sites myself, I can tell you there are an awful lot of young men who seem to have a 'thing' for older women.  No doubt some are just seeking what they think will be easy sex without the consequence of commitment or children, but some seem only attracted to older women. Whatever their reasons, they don't want to believe they are too young or that an older woman would not be interested in dating them.  For the most part, these young guys are deluded because, if not, they would be pursuing women who are actually looking for a younger guy.

I actually feel sorry for these guys because they are wasting their time trying to chat up women who see them as too young.  Contrary to popular myth, there are not tons of older women seeking young men.  There are probably some, but I get the impression from what these young guys say that they have chatted to lots of older women and keep getting the same answer - no, you are too young!  

So, yes there are some young guys who are mainly interested in older women.  I suppose they are just as capable as anyone else of falling in love.  After all, if it was the other way round, no-one would think it odd.  An older guy dating a younger woman would be seen as a lucky stud!  Could he fall in love with his younger woman?  Well, why not?

If your friend prefers a large age gap, then there is nothing you can do about that.  Most lecturers would be wary of starting relationships with students as it could be seen as a conflict of interest as a minimum and, I'm sure, at some institutions is probably forbidden.

I would advise your friend to check into the rules at that educational institution before he even attempts to pursue a relationship.  If the woman is pursuing the relationship, then again your friend ought to check the rules.  I would say the same whether it was an older male or older female.

 

Edited by spiderowl
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