Give her Space?

[Tgee92]

Hi guys,

so basically I’ve been dating a girl since august through the lockdown period and the past 2 couple of weeks have been Rocky for reasons I’ll explain and she just keeps telling me she needs to clear her mind. 
 

Now a brief summary about her and her past.

She’s been hurt extremely bad by previous ex’s mentally and physically so she has her guard up massively when it comes to men. It even took me 3 months until I got her number.

She’s got a daughter who I’ve met once but she says this is the reason we don’t see each other often because she’s scared of her daughter getting hurt. So unless somebody is looking after her I can see her, so I’ve actually been able to see my girlfriend literally once a week. 
 

now the situation is that she’s pregnant and she feels absolutely rubbish because she couldn’t answer questions about my family history because she said she doesn’t even know any of it even my birthday. She says she just needs space to process all this and she keeps ignoring any messages I say to her about asking her to even come on a walk to clear her mind. 
 

I mean how much space can I give her? I don’t bombard her with texts. I don’t constantly ring her? I don’t turn up at her home, I’m just there on texts if she needs me. 
 

any advice would be massive and greatly appreciated

 

[trident_2020]

You've known, or hardly known this girl since August. That's less than 6 months, and she's pregnant with your child?

The woman doesn't even know your birthday, and your main concern is how much space to give her?

Google "priorities".  Then we'll go from there.

[littleblackheart]

5 hours ago, Tgee92 said:

It even took me 3 months until I got her number.

Counting from August?

I don't know Tgee22, from what you're posting, it doesn't sound like you're being super proactive about your gf's pregnancy. It also sounds like you've seen each other less than 30 says over a period of 6 months, which isn't a lot, really.

It's a bit worrying that she won't even take a walk with you to clear her head.

Can you give us a little more context? 

[Tgee92]

We’ve definitely seen each other less than 30 days if I think about it in total. 
 

her daughter due to her violent ex past is scared of him coming back and kicking off again. So she says this is the reason in which we aren’t seeing each other  as much as we possibly can be.

I’ve been trying to be there more than I possibly could be but she’s the type of woman who reply’s back to everything saying “I’m fine don’t worry” which we all know means that she isn’t fine.

at the moment she is having daily complications with her pregnancy, do this would be affecting her mood massively and she just keeps saying she needs space to take it all in and can’t wait for the complications to be finished so we can move on from it apparently.

[Fletch Lives]

Oh wow, you have a pregnant woman who has issues and/or does not like you. I'd talk to a counselor and perhaps a lawyer too.

[Gaeta]

8 hours ago, Tgee92 said:

her daughter due to her violent ex past is scared of him coming back and kicking off again. So she says this is the reason in which we aren’t seeing each other  as much as we possibly can be.

at the moment she is having daily complications with her pregnancy, do this would be affecting her mood massively and she just keeps saying she needs space to take it all in and can’t wait for the complications to be finished so we can move on from it apparently.

Did it cross your mind that all of this could be lies? There is just something unreal in her story. She's pregnant of how long? Daily complications? That all sounds so....made up. 

[d0nnivain]

Space doesn't help.  Since you are the father to the step sibling, it's way past time for you to meet the daughter.  You need to be there for your GF & the baby but before any of that you probably would benefit from a paternity test.