peach302 Posted February 4, 2021 Posted February 4, 2021 8 hours ago, winny said: A lot of these guys watch YouTube videos on how to play with women... and these techniques work unless you have really high self esteem and you get turned off by such stuff quickly. Those men who make youtube videos for other men and how to play women are downright idiotic. 2
Author sushiandtacos Posted February 4, 2021 Author Posted February 4, 2021 13 hours ago, Watercolors said: Eeek. Looks are not everything. Try this: go by a man's actions, not his words (or appearance). You can't judge a book by its cover, dear! So what if he's cuter. I've dated plenty of plain looking guys throughout my life, who I grew attracted to once I got to know them. Don't cut off your nose to spite your face. Wow, I'm full of advice idioms tonight! He's not going to change just because you meet him in person. He's shown you who he is, and where you fall on his interest-level meter. But you clearly don't seem to recognize that actions speak louder then words. You need to believe people, when they reveal their true character to you - not give them infinite chances to disappoint you, which is what you're already doing with guy (or loser) #1. You've done all the legwork already just to try to get him to meet you for a first date. That is a HUGE red flag on your part and his. Red flag for you, b/c it shows me that you are willing to forgo any boundaries just to please the other person. Red flag for him, b/c he's shown you repeatedly now, that he's just not that interested in meeting you through his inaction of following through on a first date arrangement on his part, b/c you'll do it for him. He's not worth you wasting your time for. He is a flake. He will not suddenly stop flaking on you, just b/c you finally get him to meet you face to face. Those types of people never change. They are who they are. Advantage-takers. Yes very true looks aren't everything, something I'm still working on is to go by the guy's actions not his looks. And I agree he's already shown me his lack of planning and effort, which I have in the back of my mind and maybe I shouldn't have done the work. I just thought I didn't want to be waiting around for details and plans the day of again so I should take the reins and plan... but now I know not to do that with this guy lol. Thanks Watercolors! 1
Author sushiandtacos Posted February 4, 2021 Author Posted February 4, 2021 10 hours ago, josedelamuerte said: At the risk of being unpopular - I'm for guy #2. I think you're making more of an effort with him because you have a strong intuition about him. Butterflies and all that. I'd trust that over any of the dating advice cliches I hear dropping here. Also - this whole "It's the guys job to ask you out, set the date, make the reservations, bring flowers and hold the door" thing is so old fashioned. Downright outdated if you ask me. It makes the whole setup feel like a battle. He has to do this, he has to do that, and then if he doesn't you get angry and judgemental about tiny inconsequential stuff. You have a common goal of getting together. Help each other out. Think about it as a team effort. Yeah that was my initial thought when I planned everything since he was the one to initiate wanting to do something. I think its his previous actions and flakiness is why I was annoyed with myself for planning it this time. 2
Author sushiandtacos Posted February 4, 2021 Author Posted February 4, 2021 2 hours ago, poppyfields said: I don't disagree, especially once you start regularly dating. But there was no "team" effort. He did nothing forcing sushi to do it all - think of places to meet, secure the time and make the reservation. While he sat back probably playing video games or something. For some reason, his elusiveness and evasiveness turns her on and gives her butterflies. sushi, I would explore that as it's not the best or healthiest reason to base your attractions to men on unless you go for chaotic and unstable dating experiences and relationships. No judgment, I had to learn this myself. Haha yes you are so right there was no team effort LOL. I think before all this flakiness we were actually having good text conversations and he was really attentive to what I would say, making me curious and wanting to meet him in person. I think this initial interest outweighed his elusiveness enough to where I am still wanting to meet. I know I should've been more put off by that but sometimes it's hard to control that. But thanks poppy really appreciate this, i'm still learning everyday!! 1
Author sushiandtacos Posted February 4, 2021 Author Posted February 4, 2021 5 hours ago, d0nnivain said: Talking longer is not a good enough reason to ignore the red flags that are popping up. He may be kind & polite in person but his actions show that he doesn't value you very much. No matter how cute he is, that won't make up for the lesser way he treats you. Yeah very true, except I just maybe thought meeting him IRL would be different and if he does end up being the rude/lazy person he showed to be in person then at least I would 100% know that! 1
Author sushiandtacos Posted February 4, 2021 Author Posted February 4, 2021 2 hours ago, smackie9 said: Me...maybe I'm old fashioned well because I'm old, but to me first impressions count! In my books a man has to put his best foot forward for a first date, etc. That just reflects who he is, and how he carries himself. If he's gonna act like a lazy sot, then go for the one that has his ducks in a row, that sets up a date on a prime date night, treating you like a lady because he's being a gentleman. Yes so far guy #1 is giving me less headaches so a win in my books 2
Author sushiandtacos Posted February 4, 2021 Author Posted February 4, 2021 1 hour ago, peach302 said: I didnt read this before my last post. So you organised everything? Ok well my advice now is meet him still, you may aswell. But for next time let him do the organising. Don't allow him to be lazy again. Yes he just picked the day then I found a place, made reservations and confirmed with him. Wow I know what it feels like to be in the guy's shoes. But yes planning on meeting him tomorrow and going from there haha. 2
Author sushiandtacos Posted February 4, 2021 Author Posted February 4, 2021 Thanks guys for ya'lls thoughts really appreciate them, sorry if a lot my typing isn't making sense I had a long morning! 2
poppyfields Posted February 4, 2021 Posted February 4, 2021 sushi, this is a first meet, correct? Wondering why the reservation, where are you going that would require something so formal? First meets should (imho) be low key and somewhat casual, a trendy coffee cafe or a club where you sit at the bar, have a drink, maybe share some apps? Is this is a formal sit-down dinner? If so, yikes. That's pretty risky but I hope it works out for you. Keep us posted! 1
peach302 Posted February 4, 2021 Posted February 4, 2021 41 minutes ago, sushiandtacos said: Yes he just picked the day then I found a place, made reservations and confirmed with him. Wow I know what it feels like to be in the guy's shoes. But yes planning on meeting him tomorrow and going from there haha. Wicked!! Update afterwards 1
poppyfields Posted February 4, 2021 Posted February 4, 2021 44 minutes ago, sushiandtacos said: Yes he just picked the day then I found a place, made reservations and confirmed with him. Wow I know what it feels like to be in the guy's shoes. Don't be surprised if he expects you to pick up the tab as well. Teasing ya, good luck, fingers crossed he doesnt flake! 1
Author sushiandtacos Posted February 4, 2021 Author Posted February 4, 2021 12 minutes ago, poppyfields said: sushi, this is a first meet, correct? Wondering why the reservation, where are you going that would require something so formal? First meets should (imho) be low key and somewhat casual, a trendy coffee cafe or a club where you sit at the bar, have a drink, maybe share some apps? Is this is a formal sit-down dinner? If so, yikes. That's pretty risky but I hope it works out for you. Keep us posted! Well with the lockdown and due to limited capacity its mostly via reservations even just to get drinks right now so definitely not a sit down dinner LOL. 2
Author sushiandtacos Posted February 4, 2021 Author Posted February 4, 2021 Just now, poppyfields said: Don't be surprised if he expects you to pick up the tab as well. Teasing ya, good luck, fingers crossed he doesnt flake! I might as well 1
StrongHands Posted February 4, 2021 Posted February 4, 2021 (edited) 14 minutes ago, poppyfields said: Don't be surprised if he expects you to pick up the tab as well. Teasing ya, good luck, fingers crossed he doesnt flake! That is not acceptable......he should pay enough said even if it’s JUST sushi and tacos Personally, I would get something good .....beef Wellington perhaps Edited February 4, 2021 by StrongHands 1
Author sushiandtacos Posted February 4, 2021 Author Posted February 4, 2021 9 minutes ago, StrongHands said: That is not acceptable......he should pay enough said even if it’s JUST sushi and tacos Personally, I would get something good .....beef Wellington perhaps Well we are just getting drinks but I might order two.. 1
Acacia98 Posted February 4, 2021 Posted February 4, 2021 I'm actually curious to see how this pans out. sushiandtacos, do keep us posted! 2
StrongHands Posted February 4, 2021 Posted February 4, 2021 9 minutes ago, Acacia98 said: I'm actually curious to see how this pans out. sushiandtacos, do keep us posted! I am curious as well. I sure do hope that things GO great for sushi 4
Author sushiandtacos Posted February 4, 2021 Author Posted February 4, 2021 19 minutes ago, StrongHands said: I am curious as well. I sure do hope that things GO great for sushi Thanks stronghands 3
StrongHands Posted February 5, 2021 Posted February 5, 2021 6 hours ago, sushiandtacos said: Thanks stronghands Awwww, you are so welcome I am pulling for you 1
Author sushiandtacos Posted February 6, 2021 Author Posted February 6, 2021 Hi loveshack fam, date with guy #2 went unexpectedly well... 1
Author sushiandtacos Posted February 6, 2021 Author Posted February 6, 2021 He was really sweet and very different than how he appeared from his texts lol. We had a great time and agreed to do something together soon! 2
Wiseman2 Posted February 6, 2021 Posted February 6, 2021 58 minutes ago, sushiandtacos said: He was really sweet and very different than how he appeared from his texts lol. We had a great time and agreed to do something together soon! Excellent. What happened with guy#1?
josedelamuerte Posted February 6, 2021 Posted February 6, 2021 1 hour ago, sushiandtacos said: He was really sweet and very different than how he appeared from his texts lol. We had a great time and agreed to do something together soon! YES! I knew it! Intuition FTW. Very happy for you 1
Author sushiandtacos Posted February 6, 2021 Author Posted February 6, 2021 9 hours ago, Wiseman2 said: Excellent. What happened with guy#1? Well I'm seeing guy #1 tonight so I will also update you guys on that too!
StrongHands Posted February 6, 2021 Posted February 6, 2021 30 minutes ago, sushiandtacos said: Well I'm seeing guy #1 tonight so I will also update you guys on that too! You go sushi........You are a dating machine....Good Luck and Have Fun 1
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