peach302 Posted January 27, 2021 Posted January 27, 2021 16 hours ago, Scorpi said: We are in our 30's. I probably moved in with him too soon. I should have found out who he really is before that. Also it seems like he is picking fights with me over small things which is stressful since I don't like when people are upset and try to make everything better. He's not the one for you. A relationship should enhance/enrich your life for the better. This man is doing nothing but making you feel miserable. 1
trident_2020 Posted January 27, 2021 Posted January 27, 2021 20 hours ago, Scorpi said: Just wanted to see what it was for myself. Also it was used before and didn't cause any problems But you didn't know that when you plugged it in. I'm not liking the way you justify your actions.
Author Scorpi Posted January 27, 2021 Author Posted January 27, 2021 27 minutes ago, trident_2020 said: But you didn't know that when you plugged it in. I'm not liking the way you justify your actions. Ok. I had enough of this. This shouldn't be the focus of this post. 1
trident_2020 Posted January 27, 2021 Posted January 27, 2021 This is one of those threads where I'd really like to hear what the other side has to say. 2
FMW Posted January 27, 2021 Posted January 27, 2021 On 1/26/2021 at 10:25 AM, Scorpi said: A couple of days ago, he said that our relationship mightn't be long term since it seems like we have different values which I didn't agree with. I think that's what you need to focus on. I think I would have asked exactly what he meant, but I know sometimes when you hear something unexpectedly you can of freeze. But I would definitely go back to him and ask for details IF you want to try and stay in the relationship. I think it would probably be best to move out though, either way. Get some space and clear your head. It's hard to see things clearly when you're sharing the same space all the time. My guess is with some space you'll decide to just move on from him.
peach302 Posted January 27, 2021 Posted January 27, 2021 (edited) 1 hour ago, trident_2020 said: This is one of those threads where I'd really like to hear what the other side has to say. The ops partner keeps going crazy over trivial matters. Hardly tolerable behaviour. I think her side is more than enough Edited January 27, 2021 by peach302 4
basil67 Posted January 27, 2021 Posted January 27, 2021 I agree that there's two sides to this. I'm all for letting trivial matters slide, but when there are many trivial matters, it can get to a point where it does a person's head in and they react strongly. This is the time to break up. 2
Acacia98 Posted January 27, 2021 Posted January 27, 2021 2 hours ago, Scorpi said: Ok. I had enough of this. This shouldn't be the focus of this post. Welcome to Loveshack. Methinks the guy has abusive tendencies. OP doesn't paint a flattering picture of some of her own actions. But even if I tried hard to be charitable regarding the guy, he'd still remind me of all the people I know who explode when others do irritating things to them but somehow expect to be accommodated when they're being total a***oles. Ultimately, the best solution is to move out and break up. 4
Fletch Lives Posted January 28, 2021 Posted January 28, 2021 16 hours ago, Scorpi said: This no affection is hard on me since I am very affectionate. I love being romantic. Women need affection and romance to stay in love. It's a requirement. That's just the way it works.
Wiseman2 Posted January 28, 2021 Posted January 28, 2021 Such a simple solution. Move back home and get your own laptop. Especially if your work depends on it. He doesn't want you living there or rearranging, using or prying through his stuff. So the living together test drive failed. That's ok. Next time take your time and be more prepared to live together in a more balanced and independent way. He is just not the right guy for you. 2 1
trident_2020 Posted January 28, 2021 Posted January 28, 2021 5 hours ago, Fletch Lives said: Women need affection and romance to stay in love. It's a requirement. That's just the way it works. Not from the stories I've read on this forum and others that were from abused women who continue to love their captor despite the abuse and lack of affection. You gotta watch those blanket generalizations. By their very nature, they are rarely accurate.
Author Scorpi Posted January 28, 2021 Author Posted January 28, 2021 42 minutes ago, Scorpi said: Update: So my boyfriend told me that I have one month to improve my behavior. I'm like it is him that needs to improve his behavior and not me. I just made a couple of small mistakes which he shouldn't have lost his temper over. Plus he has other issues as well. Also I just talked to my parents. They told me that I can move in with them if I need to which I feel relieved about. I also just caught him eavesdropping on me while I talked to my dad and spying on him while I was working which isn't called for.
d0nnivain Posted January 28, 2021 Posted January 28, 2021 the minute he said you have 1 month to improve, I would have started making arrangements to improve my life by no longer living with him. You tried this. It didn't work. You are starved for affection. There is no point in staying any longer than it will take to get packed & moved. 2
peach302 Posted January 28, 2021 Posted January 28, 2021 19 minutes ago, Scorpi said: I also just caught him eavesdropping on me while I talked to my dad and spying on him while I was working which isn't called for. You're leaving right. He's very controlling. This would never have a happy ending. Best to cut him out while you can.
peach302 Posted January 28, 2021 Posted January 28, 2021 8 hours ago, Fletch Lives said: Women need affection and romance to stay in love. It's a requirement. That's just the way it works. On the contrary many women are treated badly, not receiving any affection but continue to stay in love and with the man. 2
poppyfields Posted January 28, 2021 Posted January 28, 2021 12 minutes ago, d0nnivain said: the minute he said you have 1 month to improve, I would have started making arrangements to improve my life by no longer living with him. This! And no longer being in a relationship with him either. Scorpi, what was your response to him saying that? What are you gonna do? 1
Author Scorpi Posted January 28, 2021 Author Posted January 28, 2021 (edited) 16 minutes ago, poppyfields said: This! And no longer being in a relationship with him either. Scorpi, what was your response to him saying that? What are you gonna do? I am moving out when the timing is right since I am getting sick of dealing with him and his issues. Right now, the weather is bad and my parents are out of town. Edited January 28, 2021 by Scorpi 2
Gaeta Posted January 28, 2021 Posted January 28, 2021 How long your parents are gone for? You explained the situation to them?
Author Scorpi Posted January 28, 2021 Author Posted January 28, 2021 1 minute ago, Gaeta said: How long your parents are gone for? You explained the situation to them? For around a week. And yes, I did. They told me that they can help me move out when they get back
trident_2020 Posted January 28, 2021 Posted January 28, 2021 41 minutes ago, Scorpi said: I am moving out when the timing is right since I am getting sick of dealing with him and his issues. Right now, the weather is bad and my parents are out of town. So what your parents are out of town, surely they'll give you access since you'll be living there. So what if the weather is bad? If it's cold, put on a warm jacket. If it's wet put on a raincoat and wrap the valuable stuff in plastic. Sounds like excuses to me.
Author Scorpi Posted January 28, 2021 Author Posted January 28, 2021 4 minutes ago, trident_2020 said: So what your parents are out of town, surely they'll give you access since you'll be living there. So what if the weather is bad? If it's cold, put on a warm jacket. If it's wet put on a raincoat and wrap the valuable stuff in plastic. Sounds like excuses to me. It has been snowing here. I also need boxes which I don't have. I have a full time job as well 1
trident_2020 Posted January 28, 2021 Posted January 28, 2021 When you're ready try to make a clean break without giving him any notice. Otherwise he'll probably try to talk you out of it. Also it's sweeter revenge that way.
Alvi Posted January 28, 2021 Posted January 28, 2021 20 minutes ago, Scorpi said: It has been snowing here. I also need boxes which I don't have. I have a full time job as well Do you have relatives or friends? Someone who can help you to move out?
peach302 Posted January 28, 2021 Posted January 28, 2021 36 minutes ago, Scorpi said: It has been snowing here. I also need boxes which I don't have. I have a full time job as well I would have left by now. 1
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