He takes ages to respond to a text message!

[winny]

On 1/24/2021 at 3:27 AM, girlnextdoor2020 said:

I didn't track anything. I was on WhatsApp talking to other people and saw he was there online once. That's it. You are painting a picture of me I am not.

And to check that you have to open the chat with him. Why would you do that if you didn’t wanna know whether he is online or not ? Lol of course you were trying to stalk and make up stories about him ignoring you and talking to others instead. 

[girlnextdoor2020]

8 hours ago, astutise said:

This guy sounds identical to one I came across on OLD! Same age and the supermarket thing and then being all wishy washy. Weird. Imagine if its the same person...are you in the UK, OP?

Well yes I am! lol

West Midlands, and you?

[girlnextdoor2020]

2 hours ago, Noproblem said:

I can't read the whole topic

but anyone who doesn't text normally is a no for me, if they can't make simple effort to text, communicate, then why should I waste my time with them!

 

 

Thank you. That’s what I have been trying to say in this thread but for some people not communicating properly through texting is normal. To me is not. 

Edited January 26, 2021 by girlnextdoor2020

[girlnextdoor2020]

4 hours ago, peach302 said:

Who asks to meet someone in a supermarket lol. First I've heard that 😂😂

He asked to meet at his place first. I told him is a bit too soon for me to go to his place so because everywhere is closed due to the pandemic he said for us to meet at the supermarket... I told him that is a bit weird for me and we could go for a walk instead.

[girlnextdoor2020]

44 minutes ago, winny said:

I knew you won’t cancel on him... 

I gave him the benefit of the doubt and had another chance to see how he is. I am done now.

[girlnextdoor2020]

40 minutes ago, winny said:

And to check that you have to open the chat with him. Why would you do that if you didn’t wanna know whether he is online or not ? Lol of course you were trying to stalk and make up stories about him ignoring you and talking to others instead. 

Yes I opened the chat with him to see if I missed any message and saw him online. What's the problem in that?

I wasn't making up stories. I found this situation with him very weird and was just trying to understand it. I do believe there's something going on with him not good but I am done now.

[hajk]

Good that you finally moved on.  Onwards and upwards.

[peach302]

6 hours ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

Yes I opened the chat with him to see if I missed any message and saw him online. What's the problem in that?

I wasn't making up stories. I found this situation with him very weird and was just trying to understand it. I do believe there's something going on with him not good but I am done now.

How was your date with the other guy.

You were saying you were going to meet someone else?

[stillafool]

8 minutes ago, peach302 said:

How was your date with the other guy.

You were saying you were going to meet someone else?

Yeah I can't wait to hear about this guy.  Hope she had fun. Good riddance to the other guy.

[winny]

7 hours ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

I gave him the benefit of the doubt and had another chance to see how he is. I am done now.

i have done this so many times.... learn from my mistakes... DO NOT GIVE THESE MEN BENEFIT OF DOUBT

it never ends well...! trust you gut feeling the first time. 

[winny]

7 hours ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

Yes I opened the chat with him to see if I missed any message and saw him online. What's the problem in that?

I wasn't making up stories. I found this situation with him very weird and was just trying to understand it. I do believe there's something going on with him not good but I am done now.

I would suggest not to get so invested in a guy that you have met only couple of times that you feel the need to check whether he is online or not - whatsapp, dating app, Facebook, insta etc. Can you imagine how you will behave if a guy ignores you after 5 or 10 dates? you will go crazy. so control yourself from beginning to give into these urges. the situation isn't weird. it is quite common. unfortunately. so you gotta protect yourself. 

[winny]

7 hours ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

He asked to meet at his place first. I told him is a bit too soon for me to go to his place so because everywhere is closed due to the pandemic he said for us to meet at the supermarket... I told him that is a bit weird for me and we could go for a walk instead.

He wanted to meet you while buying his groceries so he is not spending any extra time on you. what a loser.. probably just wanted a hook up. 

[girlnextdoor2020]

43 minutes ago, peach302 said:

How was your date with the other guy.

You were saying you were going to meet someone else?

Yes it went well!

We went for a walk and got coffee and sit down for a chat at the park. It was easy and effortless. Like it is supposed to be! 

He seems nice, but let's see how it goes now.

[girlnextdoor2020]

2 minutes ago, winny said:

He wanted to meet you while buying his groceries so he is not spending any extra time on you. what a loser.. probably just wanted a hook up. 

Probably. His first invite was to to go to his house...

Edited January 26, 2021 by girlnextdoor2020

[stillafool]

2 minutes ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

Yes it went well!

We went for a walk and got coffee and sit down for a chat at the park. It was easy and effortless. Like it is supposed to be! 

He seems nice, but let's see how it goes now.

Good for you.  Did you feel any chemistry?

[d0nnivain]

2 minutes ago, winny said:

He wanted to meet you while buying his groceries so he is not spending any extra time on you. what a loser.. probably just wanted a hook up. 

No.  They live in the UK where everything is closed.  The OP balked at going to his house (I would have too) so he picked the most public place he could think of that was open.  

[d0nnivain]

7 minutes ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

Yes it went well!

We went for a walk and got coffee and sit down for a chat at the park. It was easy and effortless. Like it is supposed to be! 

He seems nice, but let's see how it goes now.

So happy for you!  

[dramafreezone]

2 hours ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

Yes it went well!

We went for a walk and got coffee and sit down for a chat at the park. It was easy and effortless. Like it is supposed to be! 

He seems nice, but let's see how it goes now.

That's interesting.  Why couldn't you take this stance with the other guy?

[Miss Spider]

It’s hard for things to be easy and effortless with someone who takes forever to communicate and keeps canceling ... oh it’s a little rainy today how about tomorrow. I know it is fine five minutes away where you’re at but I just don’t feel up to it today. How about tomorrow? Cool. Sorry about that. Thanks for understanding. See you on the 12th of never maybe. 

I wish I could say he is out of the picture for good but I really doubt it. They usually are able to jerk OPies around a little bit longer than this.

 

btw Hey Winny!!! Long time no see. Love seeing throwback LSers. 

[girlnextdoor2020]

2 hours ago, Shortskirtslonglashes said:

It’s hard for things to be easy and effortless with someone who takes forever to communicate and keeps canceling ... oh it’s a little rainy today how about tomorrow. I know it is fine five minutes away where you’re at but I just don’t feel up to it today. How about tomorrow? Cool. Sorry about that. Thanks for understanding. See you on the 12th of never maybe. 

I wish I could say he is out of the picture for good but I really doubt it. They usually are able to jerk OPies around a little bit longer than this.

 

btw Hey Winny!!! Long time no see. Love seeing throwback LSers. 

You know what? I went on the date today with the other guy and it went so well I totally forgot about the other guy of this thread. Today he sent me a message in the afternoon saying ‘oh sorry I feel asleep after lunch and couldn’t meet you again today’. 😂

I told him no worries bro, and deleted his number.

[girlnextdoor2020]

4 hours ago, stillafool said:

Good for you.  Did you feel any chemistry?

I did! 😊

[d0nnivain]

37 minutes ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

I told him no worries bro, and deleted his number.

Finally.  

[Farthest]

3 hours ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

You know what? I went on the date today with the other guy and it went so well I totally forgot about the other guy of this thread. Today he sent me a message in the afternoon saying ‘oh sorry I feel asleep after lunch and couldn’t meet you again today’. 😂

I told him no worries bro, and deleted his number.

Hahaha I love that reaction!! So much satisfaction!

[Menara]

I have experienced this A LOT, and to be honest, it's almost impossible to tell what is going on! 

I was dating this guy for two months, and he was SO into me (I know because he would go on and on about how amazing I was), but between dates he would only text every second day. I personally dislike that since, unless you see each other very frequently, texting (or calling) is the only way to continue bonding in between dates. But that's just how he rolled. I did point it out to him and things improved a little bit. 

Then, another guy I was seeing for a little while was also being very inconsistent with the texting. He would text a lot forth and back when he was bored (so it seemed) and then disappear for days when he was busy. It was very confusing and nerve-wrecking. It finally turned out that he was being indecisive about wanting to date me because he had recently come out of a 12-year relationship and wasn't ready yet to date again.

All that to say that it could go both ways. Overall though, in my experience, I find that men, even when super busy or that hate texting, will make an effort to text at least once a day if they are interested. They wouldn't risk loosing you by their lack of communications. That being said, my first example above proves that there are also exceptions. 

I think more importantly pay attention to how he is when you are together. Does he seem loving and caring? Do you see each other regularly? Does he make sure to lock in another date after each date?

Also, I wouldn't recommend taking as long to text back as he does. That's just playing games, and frankly you are telling him that this rhythm of texting is ok with you. Instead, when he texts, text him back right away and see if he is willing to engage in a conversation. If the ball doesn't get tossed back and forth at least a few times, then I think you have your answer. 

Good luck! I know how nerve-wrecking all this can be!

Quote

 

 

[peach302]

18 minutes ago, Menara said:

I have experienced this A LOT, and to be honest, it's almost impossible to tell what is going on! 

I was dating this guy for two months, and he was SO into me (I know because he would go on and on about how amazing I was), but between dates he would only text every second day. I personally dislike that since, unless you see each other very frequently, texting (or calling) is the only way to continue bonding in between dates. But that's just how he rolled. I did point it out to him and things improved a little bit. 

Then, another guy I was seeing for a little while was also being very inconsistent with the texting. He would text a lot forth and back when he was bored (so it seemed) and then disappear for days when he was busy. It was very confusing and nerve-wrecking. It finally turned out that he was being indecisive about wanting to date me because he had recently come out of a 12-year relationship and wasn't ready yet to date again.

All that to say that it could go both ways. Overall though, in my experience, I find that men, even when super busy or that hate texting, will make an effort to text at least once a day if they are interested. They wouldn't risk loosing you by their lack of communications. That being said, my first example above proves that there are also exceptions. 

I think more importantly pay attention to how he is when you are together. Does he seem loving and caring? Do you see each other regularly? Does he make sure to lock in another date after each date?

Also, I wouldn't recommend taking as long to text back as he does. That's just playing games, and frankly you are telling him that this rhythm of texting is ok with you. Instead, when he texts, text him back right away and see if he is willing to engage in a conversation. If the ball doesn't get tossed back and forth at least a few times, then I think you have your answer. 

Good luck! I know how nerve-wrecking all this can be!

 

I think a lot of people think texting only takes a millisecond so if the guy can't bare such little time to message back that is equal to him being uninterested.

I guess it all depends on the individual  involved and can vary from situation  to situation.