justafleshwound Posted January 11, 2021 Posted January 11, 2021 I've been stuck in a dating rut the last few years where I can never get out of the casual or initial stages of being with a woman and on to the actual dating/seeing someone phase. I'm a guy in my late 30s and date in NYC. Women have always been attracted to me and it has never been difficult to get dates and most of the women say they are looking for a partnership or something "real". Sometimes its basic dates, something its more sex based, however no matter how slow or fast we start out, they always pass on me for actual dating in favor of someone else. I'm always told how handsome and sweet I am but that they can't imagine something romantic forming. It finally culminated in me blowing it with someone really amazing that I had what amounted to a fling with the last two months of 2020, so I want to make a change. I make a great living with a great career and stable life, no kids or skeletons in my closet. I tend to be viewed as the stereotypical "nice" guy so its possible I'm making mistakes like being too available and accommodating. But I'd love advice from women on what I might be missing that you look for that distinguish basic dating or flings vs actually committing to dating someone for a while. Also curious if there are guys out there who have the same problem as me.
chillii Posted January 11, 2021 Posted January 11, 2021 31 minutes ago, justafleshwound said: I've been stuck in a dating rut the last few years where I can never get out of the casual or initial stages of being with a woman and on to the actual dating/seeing someone phase. I'm a guy in my late 30s and date in NYC. Women have always been attracted to me and it has never been difficult to get dates and most of the women say they are looking for a partnership or something "real". Sometimes its basic dates, something its more sex based, however no matter how slow or fast we start out, they always pass on me for actual dating in favor of someone else. I'm always told how handsome and sweet I am but that they can't imagine something romantic forming. It finally culminated in me blowing it with someone really amazing that I had what amounted to a fling with the last two months of 2020, so I want to make a change. I make a great living with a great career and stable life, no kids or skeletons in my closet. I tend to be viewed as the stereotypical "nice" guy so its possible I'm making mistakes like being too available and accommodating. But I'd love advice from women on what I might be missing that you look for that distinguish basic dating or flings vs actually committing to dating someone for a while. Also curious if there are guys out there who have the same problem as me. Ahhh, look if she's seriously interested in more being a nice guy or available ain't gonna make an iota of difference, it might even add to it but playing games or trying to be someone your not will only ruin it guaranteed, that's not the problem. For some reason women just aren't seeing you as more , maybe the right one just hasn't come along yet they know it but maybe you just aren't picking it. Coming from a male though , l don't know , you seem like you'd be a catch on the surface to me but probably with more posting and questions and details along the way people can get to the bottom of it. They may just think your a player given the money and looks.
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