alphamale Posted December 19, 2020 Posted December 19, 2020 On 12/8/2020 at 2:19 PM, flitzanu said: i mean, i'm pretty sure you're taller than Tom Cruise, so you've got that going for you, dude Everyone is taller than Tom Cruise...half of his scenes are filmed when he is standing on a box OR his co-star has to stand in a hole. And don’t get me started on the whole Scientology thing.
LivingWaterPlease Posted December 19, 2020 Posted December 19, 2020 5 hours ago, ThatDude76 said: Update ( If anyone gives a crap ) : I have a date this weekend with a 5'2" beautiful woman ( well at least seems that way from the pictures ). I am very nervous cause I just don't understand what she would see in someone like myself, she seems accomplished and professional, has a good job etc. and is well spoken. I'll tell you what she sees. You have a great way about you, you're very interesting and seem confident on this thread. You're humble but not a doormat type. You really are good with relating to all of the posters. You don't seem to be defensive in any way. I think she's really going to like you! I haven't read the last few posts so possibly you've been on the date and posted about it. Can't recall when the above was posted. 1
contel3 Posted December 19, 2020 Posted December 19, 2020 I don't care how tall a guy is. You're not short more like average size..... I will admit I can be a bit superficial when it comes to weight or early signs of aging. But I really don't care about height. I like it if the guy is not too tall, like another poster mentioned it feels like our bodies fit together better. 1 1
lana-banana Posted December 19, 2020 Posted December 19, 2020 One of the most confident men I ever dated was 5'5". He went on to marry a woman who was 5'10". This stuff only holds you back as much as you let it. 2 1
amygirl908 Posted December 19, 2020 Posted December 19, 2020 (edited) 8 hours ago, contel3 said: I don't care how tall a guy is. You're not short more like average size..... That’s what I’ve been thinking this whole time. I don’t think he’s very short pretty average height. Update us on how your date goes! Edited December 19, 2020 by amygirl908
Miss Spider Posted December 19, 2020 Posted December 19, 2020 (edited) Depends on where he lives. Average height of human male is 5’7”. Average human male in the US is 5’9”. He’s actually quite tall if he is Laotian or East Timorese. Edited December 19, 2020 by Shortskirtslonglashes
mortensorchid Posted December 19, 2020 Posted December 19, 2020 I'd suggest that you look for women who are smaller / shorter than you. I'm 5'10" and tall for a woman. I've been with men in the past who are/were shorter than me because I had the mentality someone suggested : It's not what you've got, it's how you use it. While this is certainly true, I think that men honestly want to be with a woman who is smaller than they are (heightwise). I think the shorter men felt intimidated by me in more ways than one. This is a sort of but not really politically correct thing to say nowadays, but I had a great aunt (long since passed away now) who worked as a nurse. Back in her day if they had a pairing of a tall man with a short woman or vice versa having a baby they would write "mismatch" on the chart. Nowadays? Well, I would still suggest that you look for a women who are smaller than you. Just as I should look for men who are taller than me.
astutise Posted December 20, 2020 Posted December 20, 2020 A guy at work is about 5 ft 5, has a nice face and hair and great personality and is VERY popular with the girls...even male co-workers have asked me about him as they find him dashing. He exudes a warmth and charisma and is funny - all that makes him appear very attractive.
Millennial Posted December 21, 2020 Posted December 21, 2020 Not such a big deal if you are short as long as you can beat her in an arm wrestle. 1
Dash23 Posted December 21, 2020 Posted December 21, 2020 Fantastic advice here from both men and women. I thought I'd add my 2 cents since I'm a male that is exactly your height (although a little heavier). It's important to remember that it goes both ways - I have many well built, tall, charming males friends who won't date girls unless they are considerably smaller than them as it makes them feel a little insecure. I got plenty of short friends that are dating taller (I have one friend same height as you and me who is married to a 6 foot blonde!). When I was young, there was this intimidating tough girl that a lot of guys liked when we were kids. Even though I was considerably shorter than her, she actually took a liking to me of all people and pursued me. That's all it took for me to realize what everyone else in here has stated concisely....it's all preference in the end and it's important to not get salty about it because its never personal. Many women can't do it period, while many women don't care. But if it bothers you, it's always going to be an issue regardless of whether or not they care. One of my longest relationships was with someone who was a little taller than me (meaning a lot taller than me in heels). I've also casually dated women who were taller, and even had a great long standing FWB situation with someone who was 5'11 that didn't care. Some women will even swear up and down that they can't date shorter guys, but then they give you a chance anyhow and soon realize your a catch and its not so much of a factor anymore. Many people have pointed out in this thread that it's often shorter people who tend to be the most charming catches in terms of personality. I would have to agree with this and it's important to never underestimate how far a catch of a personality will take you. And the best news of all - at the ender of the day there is still plenty of women who are shorter than you, so you're in great shape! 1
Miss Spider Posted December 22, 2020 Posted December 22, 2020 (edited) Xxxxx Edited December 22, 2020 by Shortskirtslonglashes
Author ThatDude76 Posted December 22, 2020 Author Posted December 22, 2020 First off, thank you everyone for your comments and insights. You are all very kind and helpful, I did not expect this kind of service for some random guy on the internet you've never met! My date went well over the weekend! We got along well and I had a good time, and she wants to see me again this weekend. However, it wasnt like sparks were flying left and right or anything, but I'm willing to see her again and see how it plays out. I do have a question regarding dating apps; I have some likes from woman who are fairly tall ( sometimes taller than me, ive been chatting with a cute woman who is 5'10 according to her profile ). I have my height listed in the height section, however I am wondering if this is a good enough exposer. I am not certain how interested a 5'10 woman could be for someone my size, and I assume in these cases that she may not have noticed my height? If I happen to get along with a woman online my height or taller, should I assume shes looked at my height in the height section? I feel like brining it up in conversation would be strange and unwarranted ( and may bring her height into attention, which I dont want) , but I also dont want to meet someone and they be surprised.
amygirl908 Posted December 23, 2020 Posted December 23, 2020 On 12/22/2020 at 10:54 AM, ThatDude76 said: My date went well over the weekend! We got along well and I had a good time, and she wants to see me again this weekend. However, it wasnt like sparks were flying left and right or anything, but I'm willing to see her again and see how it plays out. I feel like brining it up in conversation would be strange and unwarranted ( and may bring her height into attention, which I dont want) , but I also dont want to meet someone and they be surprised. So glad to hear that your date went well congratulations!!! Absolutely do not bring it up! I have had guys do that to me before and it's honestly an instant turn off for me. Now I am someone who looks at all profile information before I will consider talking to people and I know I've talked to guys who can't even manage to check where I'm located before hitting me up. However I think it's better to have someone be surprised because they didn't bother to read than have you ask. It comes off as really insecure. 2
Author ThatDude76 Posted December 23, 2020 Author Posted December 23, 2020 56 minutes ago, amygirl908 said: So glad to hear that your date went well congratulations!!! Absolutely do not bring it up! I have had guys do that to me before and it's honestly an instant turn off for me. Now I am someone who looks at all profile information before I will consider talking to people and I know I've talked to guys who can't even manage to check where I'm located before hitting me up. However I think it's better to have someone be surprised because they didn't bother to read than have you ask. It comes off as really insecure. Thank you amygirl ! :) Okay I wont mention it at all, I suppose if someone were to be surprised its really not my fault as its listed in my height section. I should just assume they read everything. Some comments above were talking about different heights in different locations; I am shorter than average for North America ( where I live ). However my parents are from the Canary Islands (Spain), the average height for men there from my understanding is about 5'7".
healing light Posted December 23, 2020 Posted December 23, 2020 On 12/8/2020 at 6:56 AM, ThatDude76 said: To be blunt, I am a smaller sized man. I am 169cm ( which I think is 5'6" and a half ) with a smaller build ( smaller than average size hands feet etc ), I am lean with some muscle but I am only around 135 - 140 lbs. This is the size of one of the guys I have been the most attracted to in my life. Down to the height and weight. And I've dated 200lbs/6'+ of solid muscle before. Some women will be strict on height and others will have flexible preferences. I'm somewhere between 5'3"/5'4". Easier said than done, but try not to sweat what you can't control. So many factors go into attraction. 2
amygirl908 Posted December 23, 2020 Posted December 23, 2020 6 minutes ago, healing light said: Easier said than done, but try not to sweat what you can't control. So many factors go into attraction. ^ THIS You will find someone who appreciates you for everything that you are don't get caught up on something you have zero control over. It will only drive you crazy. 2
Versacehottie Posted December 23, 2020 Posted December 23, 2020 On 12/22/2020 at 7:54 AM, ThatDude76 said: First off, thank you everyone for your comments and insights. You are all very kind and helpful, I did not expect this kind of service for some random guy on the internet you've never met! My date went well over the weekend! We got along well and I had a good time, and she wants to see me again this weekend. However, it wasnt like sparks were flying left and right or anything, but I'm willing to see her again and see how it plays out. I do have a question regarding dating apps; I have some likes from woman who are fairly tall ( sometimes taller than me, ive been chatting with a cute woman who is 5'10 according to her profile ). I have my height listed in the height section, however I am wondering if this is a good enough exposer. I am not certain how interested a 5'10 woman could be for someone my size, and I assume in these cases that she may not have noticed my height? If I happen to get along with a woman online my height or taller, should I assume shes looked at my height in the height section? I feel like brining it up in conversation would be strange and unwarranted ( and may bring her height into attention, which I dont want) , but I also dont want to meet someone and they be surprised. So glad your date went well! See? She didn't mind and effectively it sounds like you are the one who will be rejecting her, ironically due to lack of chemistry on your end. So it should tell you that once you are in the door (meaning they have no real objection or are willing to be open to you height/size or possibly find it attractive or other parts of you attractive to the point that size is of no consideration), girls will be assessing you on other things. In this case, it looks like you did a good job on those "other things" and size wasn't a roadblock at all. This is evidence for you. I feel like even though we are all pretty much telling you not to worry about it, it's going to take a lot of convincing and hard evidence for you to really believe it. I'm going to guess that a girl who is 5'10" AND CARES THAT YOU BE BIGGER probably does look at your height on there. The ones that are tall but still like you or swipe right it's because they don't mind and see other things they are interested in as well. Presume that she has seen it and made a choice that she likes. My close girlfriend who is really tall and DOES CARE looks at height almost first and she won't like/swipe on someone who is shorter than her (just her preference). So the point is that if it matters to someone, they are checking for it. I agree with the other girls--do NOT bring it up. That's your insecurity talking or wanting to make sure everything is checked off and making a much bigger focus on it than need be--and you are correct, making it awkward when it needn't be. There are a ton of reasons why a girl may or may not have chemistry with you. Height/size is probably the least of your worries when like an occupation or age, you can list it and people will filter out what they are not into. If you can being to "let go" of the focus on this and build on the positives, I think it will be great for you. But you gotta let go. Good luck 1
Dash23 Posted December 24, 2020 Posted December 24, 2020 Agreed with @amygirl908 & @Versacehottie. Don't bring it up, especially considering you already have it listed in your profile, it'll come off like your double/triple checking and it'll scream insecure. If they didn't read it and they aren't open to it, that's on them. And the girls above are right, women tend to read profiles much better than guys do, so rest assured, they will know. As I noted above in my last response, you and I are the same height and I'm okay with it since everyone has their preferences and it's all good. I have actually had nothing written in my profiles so whenever I get matches, the height convo may or may not come up. It's cheeky of me I know, but I actually don't put my height now because I've chatted with a few matches in the past who swore they would never date a shorter guy but then they changed their tune after giving it a shot anyhow and we ended up getting along in person. Needless to say, if I had my height posted then those particular matches would have probably swiped left from the get go. If they really care, they typically ask me right away and unmatch me which is cool. The only reason I do this is because I tend to date a lot and it's often casual and depending on a persons perspective if they are also open to casual, they are sometimes more flexible with what they are open to. So since it's often casual then I have brought it up the height thing a few times before meeting, while mentioning that I've dated taller and it's never been an issue for me. It just saves us the hassle of meeting up if they're totally against it. But as the girls mentioned above, I also noticed a few girls ghosted me after that convo and it may have been because they thought I was insecure about the height difference. And in the end, that's why I don't recommend doing what I do (especially if you're looking for a quality partner and just want to cut the BS! Having your height listed as you do is efficient since you'll always know the matches you get don't care about your height. I'm just a cheeky idiot who likes chopping trees from time to time because he loves tall women...but I waste too much time doing so with how I go about it LOL! Keep doing what you're doing, you're going to do great!
Lorenza Posted December 24, 2020 Posted December 24, 2020 I'm fine with someone shorter than me (I'm a 5'8 and 140 lbs), but skinnier is hard to be attracted to. I'm a mesomorph and have a strong build, develop muscle easily, so I guess I would feel quite manly paired with someone tiny. Not that I need to feel protected by a larger man, it's just an attraction thing. So a short guy who works out is fine by me!
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