cleverusername Posted January 22, 2021 Posted January 22, 2021 Two threads and 40 pages later and still no progress..... 4
Author peach302 Posted January 22, 2021 Author Posted January 22, 2021 6 minutes ago, Trail Blazer said: One can have self-respect whilst showing care and interest in others. They aren't mutually exclusive concepts. I know but that's just me
Author peach302 Posted January 22, 2021 Author Posted January 22, 2021 (edited) 3 minutes ago, cleverusername said: Two threads and 40 pages later and still no progress..... . Im waiting to call alright. In a couple of weeks time.... This will be over or it will continue... all depends on thread guy. Edited January 22, 2021 by peach302
cleverusername Posted January 22, 2021 Posted January 22, 2021 1 minute ago, peach302 said: . Im waiting to call alright. In a couple of weeks time.... This will be over or it will continue... all depends on thread guy. What does two weeks do? Where did you get this magical 2 week number at? 1
Author peach302 Posted January 22, 2021 Author Posted January 22, 2021 Just now, cleverusername said: What does two weeks do? Where did you get this magical 2 week number at? 2 weeks before i call. As its not too soon (that will irritate him) and not too late (too late for anything to be solved). Like an in between time.
poppyfields Posted January 22, 2021 Posted January 22, 2021 2 minutes ago, peach302 said: I know but that's just me That's called false pride peach. False pride gets you nowhere. Never be afraid or "too proud" to tell or show someone how much you care. It's nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about. There is also something called "one-upmanship" which is the practice of gaining a feeling of superiority over another person, getting the last word. Which is about ego. Get rid of these notions, they don't belong in a healthy mutually-rewarding relationship, assuming that is what you want. 1 1
cleverusername Posted January 22, 2021 Posted January 22, 2021 7 minutes ago, peach302 said: 2 weeks before i call. As its not too soon (that will irritate him) and not too late (too late for anything to be solved). Like an in between time. Two weeks does nothing. As a man, the longer you wait the less I care about you and further I move on. Two weeks is way to long. More like 2 days at most. He’s probably already getting ready to ask another woman out. Call tomorrow or it will definitely be a “no”. 1
Author peach302 Posted January 22, 2021 Author Posted January 22, 2021 6 minutes ago, cleverusername said: Two weeks does nothing. As a man, the longer you wait the less I care about you and further I move on. Two weeks is way to long. More like 2 days at most. He’s probably already getting ready to ask another woman out. Call tomorrow or it will definitely be a “no”. So absence doesn't make the heart grow fonder then . Maybe you're right. But its already been over a week or more. Cant remember
winny Posted January 22, 2021 Posted January 22, 2021 33 minutes ago, peach302 said: I know but that's just me Thats not self respect.. its fear.. lack of courage to be vulnerable
Trail Blazer Posted January 22, 2021 Posted January 22, 2021 34 minutes ago, peach302 said: So absence doesn't make the heart grow fonder then . Maybe you're right. But its already been over a week or more. Cant remember The person has to actually like you for the absence to cause their heart to grow fonder. 3
Alpacalia Posted January 22, 2021 Posted January 22, 2021 Oh Peach, I am hoping for the best for you! 1
Author peach302 Posted January 22, 2021 Author Posted January 22, 2021 5 minutes ago, Trail Blazer said: The person has to actually like you for the absence to cause their heart to grow fonder. Thanks for assuming he doesn't
Author peach302 Posted January 22, 2021 Author Posted January 22, 2021 1 minute ago, Alpaca said: Oh Peach, I am hoping for the best for you! Thanks alpaca
Author peach302 Posted January 22, 2021 Author Posted January 22, 2021 33 minutes ago, winny said: Thats not self respect.. its fear.. lack of courage to be vulnerable I don't think im scared though. . He might be. Never lets his guard down.
Trail Blazer Posted January 22, 2021 Posted January 22, 2021 2 minutes ago, peach302 said: Thanks for assuming he doesn't Do you live in some opppsite universe where no means yes and yes means no? Because, as far as I can tell, the guy said he was no longer interested in taking things further. Tell me where I've got it so wrong? 2
Author peach302 Posted January 22, 2021 Author Posted January 22, 2021 Just now, Trail Blazer said: Do you live in some opppsite universe where no means yes and yes means no? Because, as far as I can tell, the guy said he was no longer interested in taking things further. Tell me where I've got it so wrong? like i said. Context. Not black and white. People reject those they like all the time ...for any number of reasons. Its not like I've given my all to him and smothered him with love and he said no thanks. I contacted him after eight months of zero contact...after he asked me out!
Trail Blazer Posted January 22, 2021 Posted January 22, 2021 2 minutes ago, peach302 said: like i said. Context. Not black and white. People reject those they like all the time ...for any number of reasons. Its not like I've given my all to him and smothered him with love and he said no thanks. I contacted him after eight months of zero contact...after he asked me out! Dysfunctional people, or immature people who play stupid games do so... for dysfunctional reasons. In my world I reject those I don't like and those I do, I make it known to them. If they don't reciprocate that sentiment, I move on and never look back.
poppyfields Posted January 22, 2021 Posted January 22, 2021 (edited) 14 minutes ago, Trail Blazer said: Do you live in some opppsite universe where no means yes and yes means no? Because, as far as I can tell, the guy said he was no longer interested in taking things further. Tell me where I've got it so wrong? TB, peach essentially rejected him time and time again. She was elusive and evasive, refused to send updated pics or videochat. From his perspective, I could see how he felt jerked around. She ghosted him! Six or eight months later, however long it was, she decides to reach out, what would have been your reaction? Would you have resumed interacting same ole same ole? After being treated so shabbily and being dismissed? So they chatted a bit, he was probably trying it on, to see how it felt. He didn't feel comfortable with it (for obvious reasons) so told her he was no longer interested. It's a bit different from a guy flat out rejecting because he's not interested in her. I think he was interested, still may be, but doesn't trust her. So peach wants to call to clear the air, let him know she's changed and he can trust her. That she won't run away again, she's willing to give it a fair shot this time. That's my take anyway, peach correct me if I'm wrong! Edited January 22, 2021 by poppyfields 1
Author peach302 Posted January 22, 2021 Author Posted January 22, 2021 2 minutes ago, Trail Blazer said: Dysfunctional people, or immature people who play stupid games do so... for dysfunctional reasons. In my world I reject those I don't like and those I do, I make it known to them. If they don't reciprocate that sentiment, I move on and never look back. Yeah those types of people and also if you actually read the whole thread... normal people too.if they like someone but the person they like isnt putting in effort and comes in and out of their life..This is the first time he put a stop to it after many months.
Author peach302 Posted January 22, 2021 Author Posted January 22, 2021 2 minutes ago, poppyfields said: TB, peach essentially rejected him time and time again. She was elusive and evasive, refused to send updated pics or videochat. From his perspective, I could see how he felt jerked around. She ghosted him! Six or eight months later, however long it was, she decides to reach out, what would have been your reaction? Would you have resumed interacting same ole same ole? After being treated so shabbily and being dismissed? So they chatted it a bit, he was probably trying it on, to see how it felt. He didn't like so told her he was no longer interested. It's a bit different from a guy flat our rejecting because he's not interested in her. I think he was interested, still may be, but doesn't trust her. So peach wants to call to clear the air, let him know she's changed and he can trust her. That she won't run away again, she's willing to give it a fair shot. That's my take anyway, peach correct me if I'm wrong! Spot on poppy!!! You're completely on the mark!
cleverusername Posted January 22, 2021 Posted January 22, 2021 1 minute ago, peach302 said: Yeah those types of people and also if you actually read the whole thread... normal people too.if they like someone but the person they like isnt putting in effort and comes in and out of their life..This is the first time he put a stop to it after many months. This is the first time he put a stop to it after many months because he didn’t hear from you for half a year LOL. Those were the many months... 1
Author peach302 Posted January 22, 2021 Author Posted January 22, 2021 1 minute ago, cleverusername said: This is the first time he put a stop to it after many months because he didn’t hear from you for half a year LOL. Those were the many months... I don't know how this will go. And plenty of people are not positive on here but i shall see.
Trail Blazer Posted January 22, 2021 Posted January 22, 2021 6 minutes ago, poppyfields said: TB, peach essentially rejected him time and time again. She was elusive and evasive, refused to send updated pics or videochat. From his perspective, I could see how he felt jerked around. She ghosted him! Six or eight months later, however long it was, she decides to reach out, what would have been your reaction? Would you have resumed interacting same ole same ole? After being treated so shabbily and being dismissed? So they chatted a bit, he was probably trying it on, to see how it felt. He didn't feel comfortable with it (for obvious reasons) so told her he was no longer interested. It's a bit different from a guy flat out rejecting because he's not interested in her. I think he was interested, still may be, but doesn't trust her. So peach wants to call to clear the air, let him know she's changed and he can trust her. That she won't run away again, she's willing to give it a fair shot this time. That's my take anyway, peach correct me if I'm wrong! I wouldn't ever find myself in such a situation. I don't waste my time with women who jerk me around. Life is too short and there's many other fish in the sea.
Trail Blazer Posted January 22, 2021 Posted January 22, 2021 9 minutes ago, peach302 said: Yeah those types of people and also if you actually read the whole thread... normal people too.if they like someone but the person they like isnt putting in effort and comes in and out of their life..This is the first time he put a stop to it after many months. So, what's changed on your part? Why should he buy into your message that you've changed?
Author peach302 Posted January 22, 2021 Author Posted January 22, 2021 (edited) 17 minutes ago, poppyfields said: TB, peach essentially rejected him time and time again. She was elusive and evasive, refused to send updated pics or videochat. From his perspective, I could see how he felt jerked around. She ghosted him! Six or eight months later, however long it was, she decides to reach out, what would have been your reaction? Would you have resumed interacting same ole same ole? After being treated so shabbily and being dismissed? So they chatted a bit, he was probably trying it on, to see how it felt. He didn't feel comfortable with it (for obvious reasons) so told her he was no longer interested. It's a bit different from a guy flat out rejecting because he's not interested in her. I think he was interested, still may be, but doesn't trust her. So peach wants to call to clear the air, let him know she's changed and he can trust her. That she won't run away again, she's willing to give it a fair shot this time. That's my take anyway, peach correct me if I'm wrong! Not to mention the part where i said how many guys i rejected before i reached out to him again Lol. Talk about spoiling it for myself. I was trying to show i was getting attention from others but didnt want it ...without thinking it sounded like i spoke to many guys on the app and rejected them all then went back to him. Which sounds sooooo bad. And then he kept asking why not them and why me continuously . And just before he decided and told me he doesn't want to take it further ..i told him people want to get to know me (but the feeling isnt mutual)...in response to him asking if i was speaking to anyone else at the moment. Which is basically the same as me matching people/speaking to people on the app still and then deciding they're not for me. Edited January 22, 2021 by peach302
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