Versacehottie Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 14 hours ago, poppyfields said: Oh I recall that thread V! Good memory. I agree reading other threads are helpful, not sure about that thread though. I recall it was pretty confusing, and I also recall being quite active on it and getting pretty wound up! And being quite confused myself. Situations are similar. lol, same-same if you get my drift.. 13 + 22. It's confusing in the same way this one is confusing...remarkably. 1
Wiseman2 Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 4 hours ago, trident_2020 said: I'm starting to think you're messing with me You're the new text buddy. 5 1
trident_2020 Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 7 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said: You're the new text buddy. Yeah well you know what? I've decided I don't want to take things any further. 2 1
ExpatInItaly Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 3 hours ago, Versacehottie said: lol, same-same if you get my drift.. 13 + 22. It's confusing in the same way this one is confusing...remarkably. Yes indeed. This has been going on for ages, around and around in the same circles. I personally will bow out here because I don't really buy that it's a real thread at this point. Waste of everyone's time. 2 1
Wiseman2 Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 (edited) 3 minutes ago, trident_2020 said: Yeah well you know what? I've decided I don't want to take things any further. Sorry to hear that, hope you can heal. Edited January 10, 2021 by Wiseman2 1 1
Annonymous1234 Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 (edited) 27 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said: A bit of a side issue - but I don't get the analogy where the subject of the OP's attentions in this thread, and the guy in the similar thread, both describe themselves as feeling like a 'sandwich'. I've never heard that before. What does it mean in terms of dating? Is it US lingo? (I'm not from the US). Edited January 10, 2021 by Selkie1111
poppyfields Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 (edited) 16 hours ago, peach302 said: Well you made it sound like its not something that is owed. And that type of mentality is wrong. Sorry. What's owed, an explanation for why he doesn't want to continue? Not sure "owed" is the right word peach. Appreciated, yes! But not owed. What makes you think you are owed? Are people not entitled to contain their own personal thoughts and reasons within themselves? I go back and forth on this. How I feel currently with respect to on-line is straight ghosting is a bit weak when interacting for awhile (weeks/months), but what HE did? He very plainly told you he did not wish to take it further, which shut the door and saved you days, weeks, months wondering if you would ever hear from him again. If a man told me that, while an explanation would be lovely, I would be silently thanking him and removing from my radar, immediately and permanently. Bottom line peach, there could be so many different reasons, even in a straight ghosting situation, there could be various reasons, again things are never so black and white. All that is important is that for whatever reasons, he did not wish to continue the interaction. Please try and accept and let it go. Try to not fall into an obsession which is easy to do. There are SO many other men out there, like tons. Get back on the apps, and start chatting. Eventually one will stand out, who will be happy with messaging and playing the long game until you can meet. One with whom there won't be so much DRAMA! Lol Don't you think? Edited January 10, 2021 by poppyfields 1
poppyfields Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 40 minutes ago, Selkie1111 said: A bit of a side issue - but I don't get the analogy where the subject of the OP's attentions in this thread, and the guy in the similar thread, both describe themselves as feeling like a 'sandwich'. I've never heard that before. What does it mean in terms of dating? Is it US lingo? (I'm not from the US). I'm from the US and never heard it before. Interesting it was mentioned in both threads. Just one of those things that makes you go hmmm I guess. 3
Author peach302 Posted January 10, 2021 Author Posted January 10, 2021 52 minutes ago, Selkie1111 said: A bit of a side issue - but I don't get the analogy where the subject of the OP's attentions in this thread, and the guy in the similar thread, both describe themselves as feeling like a 'sandwich'. I've never heard that before. What does it mean in terms of dating? Is it US lingo? (I'm not from the US). It describes someone feeling like they're neither here nor there i guess or like an in betweener . Im guessing I've never heard it before 1
Author peach302 Posted January 10, 2021 Author Posted January 10, 2021 (edited) 46 minutes ago, poppyfields said: What's owed, an explanation for why he doesn't want to continue? Not sure "owed" is the right word peach. Appreciated, yes! But not owed. What makes you think you are owed? Are people not entitled to contain their own personal thoughts and reasons within themselves? I go back and forth on this. How I feel currently with respect to on-line is straight ghosting is a bit weak when interacting for awhile (weeks/months), but what HE did? He very plainly told you he did not wish to take it further, which shut the door and saved you days, weeks, months wondering if you would ever hear from him again. If a man told me that, while an explanation would be lovely, I would be silently thanking him and removing from my radar, immediately and permanently. Bottom line peach, there could be so many different reasons, even in a straight ghosting situation, there could be various reasons, again things are never so black and white. All that is important is that for whatever reasons, he did not wish to continue the interaction. Please try and accept and let it go. Try to not fall into an obsession which is easy to do. There are SO many other men out there, like tons. Get back on the apps, and start chatting. Eventually one will stand out, who will be happy with messaging and playing the long game until you can meet. One with whom there won't be so much DRAMA! Lol Don't you think? I dont disagree. Yeah people are allowed to keep their thoughts to themselves but after what i did the initiating and expressing myself.. i would have preferred a reason yes. I've seen women on reality shows being rejected and basically start begging for the guy back with gifts and declarations of love n all sorts. And for some strange reason it worked to get the guy back lol That wont be me though surely u can tell from this thread already the kind of person i am. Its my aloofness that got me to this position in the first place . Edited January 10, 2021 by peach302
Versacehottie Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 29 minutes ago, poppyfields said: I'm from the US and never heard it before. Interesting it was mentioned in both threads. Just one of those things that makes you go hmmm I guess. lol, well of course it is....hmmmm and some math will lead you to the same conclusion about the threads 1
poppyfields Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 (edited) 19 minutes ago, peach302 said: I've seen women on reality shows being rejected and basically start begging for the guy back with gifts and declarations of love n all sorts. And for some strange reason it worked to get the guy back lol Dont believe what you see on reality shows; despite it being called "reality", it's far from! Much of it is staged, hype. High drama designed to entice viewers into watching to achieve highest ratings. Which all adds up to $$$ for the network and their execs. Edited January 10, 2021 by poppyfields
Author peach302 Posted January 10, 2021 Author Posted January 10, 2021 13 minutes ago, poppyfields said: Dont believe what you see on reality shows; despite it being called "reality", it's far from! Much of it is staged, hype. High drama designed to entice viewers into watching to achieve highest ratings. Which all adds up to $$$ for the network and their execs. Yes true but some is also actually based on reality lol . But overall from what I've seen women get highly emotional over stuff like this.. i mean i wouldn't be half susprised if he expected me to go chasing him now.
poppyfields Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 28 minutes ago, peach302 said: i mean i wouldn't be half susprised if he expected me to go chasing him now. How, didn't he block you? I dunno, maybe, I mean you never know. Do you think that's his game? Rejecting you so you will chase? Never heard of that. I've heard of guys push/pulling back to get a woman chasing but not what he did. Shutting the door. But again, you never know! Nothing surprises me anymore. 1
basil67 Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 (edited) 34 minutes ago, peach302 said: Yes true but some is also actually based on reality lol . But overall from what I've seen women get highly emotional over stuff like this.. i mean i wouldn't be half susprised if he expected me to go chasing him now. No it's not based on reality. Have you ever watched documentaries about their production? FAKE. Fake. Fake. Fake. And no, he doesn't want you to chase him - there was nothing in his words which expressed sorrow that he never met you. Nor did he express anything about missing you in the six months you were AWOL. Edited January 10, 2021 by basil67 2 1
Author peach302 Posted January 10, 2021 Author Posted January 10, 2021 Yes 38 minutes ago, basil67 said: No it's not based on reality. Have you ever watched documentaries about their production? FAKE. Fake. Fake. Fake. And no, he doesn't want you to chase him - there was nothing in his words which expressed sorrow that he never met you. Nor did he express anything about missing you in the six months you were AWOL. Yes he did actually ..u know when he kept mentioning how i disappeared n had a go at me for doing so? Don't know if i put tht on here. Theres no point debating it. Also men dont tend to express sorrow easily especially someone like him. I know tht for a fact. Hes the typical manly don't express any emotion type But yeah again theres no point debating that here it was just an idea
poppyfields Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 I wouldnt be surprised if he popped up later after covid is over - months, years! Stranger things have happened. 1
Author peach302 Posted January 10, 2021 Author Posted January 10, 2021 1 minute ago, poppyfields said: I wouldnt be surprised if he popped up later after covid is over - months, years! Stranger things have happened. To be honest he's way to egotistical to come back lol. I know people say my insight is lacking but i learnt this much about him.
Author peach302 Posted January 10, 2021 Author Posted January 10, 2021 1 hour ago, poppyfields said: How, didn't he block you? I dunno, maybe, I mean you never know. Do you think that's his game? Rejecting you so you will chase? Never heard of that. I've heard of guys push/pulling back to get a woman chasing but not what he did. Shutting the door. But again, you never know! Nothing surprises me anymore. Hes played games before i think sometimes its hard to tell a game player but hes tried the trying to make me jealous game by talking about other girls...and also negging aswell ... And he unmatched me on the app. But he must know i still have his number since i told him i was going to call him and when he said calling is best etc. Actually poppy you'd be surprised...i knew of a couple of guys who would keep blocking me and saying bye..n i knew they were doing it to provoke a reaction. Some young guys do this ..then they came back. And would do it again n again..a toxic cycle. As for this guy who knows..im sure he knows at the very least i would have some sort of reaction to it. Not necessarily crying my eyes out but u know? Maybe him cutting me out was also a way of him preventing his own future hurt. As im a source of pain for him .. i could tell he was frustrated the whole way through our messages ..the undertones.
poppyfields Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 (edited) Well, we can all get a bit obsessive sometimes I suppose, it means something's happening. Edited January 10, 2021 by poppyfields 1
Miss Spider Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 (edited) He believed he was being catfished. His doubt was too strong to even maintain interest in the chat and he didn’t want to talk to you. Again, whether or not you are fishing or purposely being vague about your appearance is besides the point. Ultimately, he had his doubts and you wouldn’t/didn’t want to prove them wrong. Which is OK, but I do believe you are severely limiting your options by only showing one picture and two blurry private pics on a dating app. Just my opinion Eventually, most people get tired of the internet fantasy. With most people, you probably won’t make it very far(like past that chatting phase)I think some of them are lonely and willing to take it really far(years)and invest a lot of emotions, but most people don’t. I don’t get the impression that he did. I see from the messages he was a little amused, but not really invested. And that’s completely normal. I watched that doco “catfish”. I know the validity of that documentary is disputed, but the guy in that documentary seemed very invested. SPOILER ALERT He was talking to this woman on the phone and text for a long time. He fell for her, but when she backed out of meeting, doubts set in. His interest became more about solving the mystery and he tracked her down/ She turned out to be a crazy, lonely middle aged lady, married with disabled step children. Edited January 10, 2021 by Shortskirtslonglashes 2
Author peach302 Posted January 10, 2021 Author Posted January 10, 2021 3 minutes ago, Shortskirtslonglashes said: He believed he was being catfished. His doubt was too strong to even maintain interest in the chat and he didn’t want to talk to you. Again, whether or not you are fishing or purposely being vague about your appearance is beside the point. He had his doubts and you wouldn’t/didn’t want to prove them wrong Eventually, most people get tired of the Internet fantasy. With people with options, you probably won’t make it very far(like past a chat). I think some of them are willing to take it really far(years)and invest a lot of emotions, but most people don’t. I don’t get the inclination that he did at all. I see from the messages he was a little amused/interested but no a lot of investment. And that’s completely normal. I watched that doco “catfish”. I know the validity of that documentary is disputed, but the guy in that documentary seemed very invested. SPOILER ALERT He was talking to this woman on the phone and text for a long time. He fell for her, but when she backed out of meeting, doubts set in. His interest became more about solving the mystery and he tracked her down/ She turned out to be a crazy, lonely middle aged lady lady, married with disabled step children. I guess so. Its unfortunate as obviously im not a catfish and he's missed out on someone who's genuine. 1
poppyfields Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 (edited) 9 minutes ago, Shortskirtslonglashes said: He believed he was being catfished. His doubt was too strong to even maintain interest in the chat and he didn’t want to talk to you. Again, whether or not you are fishing or purposely being vague about your appearance is beside the point. He had his doubts and you wouldn’t/didn’t want to prove them wrong Eventually, most people get tired of the Internet fantasy. With people with options, you probably won’t make it very far(like past a chat). I think some of them are willing to take it really far(years)and invest a lot of emotions, but most people don’t. I don’t get the inclination that he did at all. I see from the messages he was a little amused/interested but no a lot of investment. And that’s completely normal. I watched that doco “catfish”. I know the validity of that documentary is disputed, but the guy in that documentary seemed very invested. SPOILER ALERT He was talking to this woman on the phone and text for a long time. He fell for her, but when she backed out of meeting, doubts set in. His interest became more about solving the mystery and he tracked her down/ She turned out to be a crazy, lonely middle aged lady lady, married with disabled step children. I watched the documentary, there is also a television series, going into its 8th season. I'm fairly certain these are true incidents, perhaps a bit hyped up for dramatic purposes (higher ratings) but yeah one can never be too sure anymore when interacting on line. Best to do some due diligence. Edited January 10, 2021 by poppyfields 1 1
poppyfields Posted January 10, 2021 Posted January 10, 2021 2 minutes ago, poppyfields said: I watched the documentary, there is also a television series, going into its 8th season. I'm fairly certain these are true incidents, perhaps a bit hyped up for dramatic purposes (higher ratings) but yeah one can never be too sure anymore when interacting on line. Best to do some due diligence. Peach, maybe calling on phone would have helped. For next time. 1
Author peach302 Posted January 10, 2021 Author Posted January 10, 2021 (edited) 2 minutes ago, poppyfields said: Peach, maybe calling on phone would have helped. For next time. Yeah definitely. Because i could have erased or tried to erase some doubts. With texting he even said himself its disingenuous ...its easier to hide stuff. I still got his number...im glad i didnt delete it in a rage which happens sometimes Edited January 10, 2021 by peach302
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