HadMeOverABarrel Posted November 11, 2020 Posted November 11, 2020 (edited) 15 hours ago, Shortskirtslonglashes said: Why are you even entertaining this if you are looking for something serious, Op? Also, why are you even entertaining this if you are NOT looking for something serious, Op? j/k This guy wouldn't be fun even if fun was all you're after. Fwiw, he was testing your boundaries (by stating his expectations) to see how much he could extract from you with the least amount of effort from him. Probably for him it's a numbers game. I'm imagining his thought process is something like: 1. Am I attracted enough to sleep with her? 2. If yes, does she have such low self esteem that she will jump through all my hoops with little to no effort from me? 3. If yes, institute "relationship." (I can't wait to get out of mom's basement and have another woman take care of me instead!) Good for you for closing the door at point 2. Sadly, some other lady will fall for this schlep. At least it won't be you! Edited November 11, 2020 by HadMeOverABarrel Winky face
Author girlnextdoor2020 Posted November 11, 2020 Author Posted November 11, 2020 49 minutes ago, HadMeOverABarrel said: Also, why are you even entertaining this if you are NOT looking for something serious, Op? j/k This guy wouldn't be fun even if fun was all you're after. Fwiw, he was testing your boundaries (by stating his expectations) to see how much he could extract from you with the least amount of effort from him. Probably for him it's a numbers game. I'm imagining his thought process is something like: 1. Am I attracted enough to sleep with her? 2. If yes, does she have such low self esteem that she will jump through all my hoops with little to no effort from me? 3. If yes, institute "relationship." (I can't wait to get out of mom's basement and have another woman take care of me instead!) Good for you for closing the door at point 2. Sadly, some other lady will fall for this schlep. At least it won't be you! Exactly. Even if I just wanted a bit of fun, this guy is not fun at all. Because he is manipulative and a player and I can see right through it. Yes fortunately I do have self esteem and look at guys without rose tinted glasses like so many women do. I'm sure some other woman will fall for it, since he was married twice, had a child from another woman (his children ages are 3, 10 and 21)! He also said that at the beginning of this year he was in a relationship with someone and they were planning in buying a house together but then broke up. Also said that his last relationship was a short one that ended 3 weeks ago... so yes I'm pretty sure some other woman will fall for it and will have his baby number 4. I'm out. 1
Wiseman2 Posted November 11, 2020 Posted November 11, 2020 (edited) Screening is your friend. Make a hard list of deal breakers and red flags. (Such as the many this guy had) . Don't waste time on anyone who has this many red flags. Simply delete and block then move on. Don't deviate this much from your searching and screening criteria. It avoids burn out when you rule out people swiftly and clearly. For example why even continue a conversation with someone who has multiple divorces? OLD is not about giving everyone a chance, it's about narrowing down and selecting people you would like to meet for coffee and taking it from there. Edited November 11, 2020 by Wiseman2 1
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