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I have a crush on my childhood best friend


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Posted

I’ve known the guy for about 15 years (we’re both 25 now), and we currently live in different cities (I’m still in my hometown, but he’s moved across the country). We’ve always kept in contact, and met up with each other when it was possible.

Both of us dated other people, and we are always good friends with each other, never crossing the line, and just so it happens, we’re both currently single right now. 

Recently, we’ve been texting constantly (much more frequently than before) and even staying up at night to chat with each other, and I’m developing a crush on him. He’s always been a nice, caring guy, and since I’ve known him forever, it’s so easy to be with him. And he’s been telling me that he’s been thinking about moving back to our hometown lately due to his family, but he hasn’t decided on anything yet.

My previous relationship ended badly, so I haven't dated for a while, and I think I’m ready to date again, but kind of want to proceed with caution. I’m just uncertain how to proceed from here. I don’t know how he feels about me, and he showed no sign of being attracted to me. And he isn’t certain he’ll move back, so I don’t know if I should wait for him? Should I wait and see if he moves back (because I’m uncertain about long-distance, but maybe he’s worth the trouble of LDR?) or just stop myself from falling headlong into this? Or is there a way to subtly ask about how he feels about me, because I absolutely don’t want to ruin our friendship, or make things awkward.

Any advice would be appreciated, thanks!

Posted

Sounds like you are lonely and wanted someone to talk to.

It's not viable as a romance for many reasons you mentioned.

Think of him as an old friend.

If you are ready to date, get a good profile and pics on some quality (paid) dating apps and start talking to and meeting local available single men.

Posted

The big problem with that is, he may only think of you as a friend. So you may be stuck in the friendszone.

Posted

You're lonely & nostalgic.  He is comfortable & safe.   Don't try to start an LDR from across the country during a pandemic.  If he comes home permanently, you can see if there is potential.  Now it's just a time waster.  Don't even mention anything at this point.  Instead enjoy reminiscing with him but go find a local guy.  

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Posted

I feel like if he was attracted to you too, you'd be picking up on it. 😟

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