lana-banana Posted September 12, 2020 Posted September 12, 2020 This man is 100% a keeper. He did those things because he's a decent man and he loves you very much, and he isn't embarrassed or disgusted by your medical condition - he's a mature adult. Maybe buy a nice thank-you card (the fancy kind that are like $8, with sequins or designs or whatever) and write a note saying how much you appreciate it, but leave it at that, because he doesn't want you making a big deal of it either. Again: this guy is a keeper. It's so great that you've found each other. A dear friend once woke up in the middle of the night with severe, intense food-poisoning diarrhea on his third date with a woman. The woman woke up, took a look at the soiled sheets, just said "okay, let's get these into the wash" and did laundry while he showered. They're married now. 2
Dork Vader Posted September 12, 2020 Posted September 12, 2020 On 9/11/2020 at 2:19 PM, Kirsty-Nicole said: I've been dating my boyfriend for 10 months and we spend 4 nights a week at each others places. With covid. It works perfect for us as we've created a "support bubble" Last night was the first night I was staying at his. I am a coeliac. I cooked for us because I promised him a nice meal as we've both been stressed with work. I must have missed a dish that had gluten. in it and I felt an attack coming on. I took some imodium, to slow the impending situation. I didn't tell my boyfriend as I knew he'd worry. We went to sleep and about 3am, I woke up and I was mid lets say attack evacuation (I'm too embarrassed to say what it actually is). My boyfriend wakes up. goes "Attack?" I'm crying and I say yes. He gets me out of my clothes and gets me to the toilet. to finish up. and he starts me a bath (even putting bubble bath in the water). I remember he kept reassuring me that its ok and not to worry. When I get in to the bath he tells me to stay in it until he gets back. He went to the supermarket bought me some new pjs (because mine were soiled), the milk I have to calm my symptoms down, some fruit and some juice as well as some more immodium. I felt really bad he had to see, deal with it and. He had stripped the bed, remade it and kept telling me not to worry and asking if I'm alright. I get in to bed and he goes downstairs and starts the washing machine. He brings me a glass of juice and tells me if I need anything to wake him. I get up this morning and hes left a duvet on the sofa and a note to say to work from home and to call if I need anything as he has had to go to see clients. I'm very embarrassed to raise the situation with him, I don't want him thinking its normal. (its rare it gets this bad) and I feel bad he had to clean up and is now looking after me. Do I just carry on like it didn't happen or do I talk to him about it? Would you get him something to say thank you? Nothing to be embarrassed about! We're all human and we all do human things and have our moments. You know what I took from all of this? You have a keeper! He sounds like an amazing guy. He was there for you and did everything you could hope for and more! 2
Mrin Posted September 12, 2020 Posted September 12, 2020 26 minutes ago, Dork Vader said: Nothing to be embarrassed about! We're all human and we all do human things and have our moments. You know what I took from all of this? You have a keeper! He sounds like an amazing guy. He was there for you and did everything you could hope for and more! This. Just keep rereading this. And, as a dude, there is something awesome about taking care of your woman. Makes you feel like Superman. 2
SincereOnlineGuy Posted September 13, 2020 Posted September 13, 2020 On 9/11/2020 at 2:19 PM, Kirsty-Nicole said: I've been dating my boyfriend for 10 months and we spend 4 nights a week at each others places. With covid. It works perfect for us as we've created a "support bubble" Last night was the first night I was staying at his. I am a coeliac. I cooked for us because I promised him a nice meal as we've both been stressed with work. I must have missed a dish that had gluten. in it and I felt an attack coming on. I took some imodium, to slow the impending situation. I didn't tell my boyfriend as I knew he'd worry. We went to sleep and about 3am, I woke up and I was mid lets say attack evacuation (I'm too embarrassed to say what it actually is). My boyfriend wakes up. goes "Attack?" I'm crying and I say yes. He gets me out of my clothes and gets me to the toilet. to finish up. and he starts me a bath (even putting bubble bath in the water). I remember he kept reassuring me that its ok and not to worry. When I get in to the bath he tells me to stay in it until he gets back. He went to the supermarket bought me some new pjs (because mine were soiled), the milk I have to calm my symptoms down, some fruit and some juice as well as some more immodium. I felt really bad he had to see, deal with it and. He had stripped the bed, remade it and kept telling me not to worry and asking if I'm alright. I get in to bed and he goes downstairs and starts the washing machine. He brings me a glass of juice and tells me if I need anything to wake him. I get up this morning and hes left a duvet on the sofa and a note to say to work from home and to call if I need anything as he has had to go to see clients. I'm very embarrassed to raise the situation with him, I don't want him thinking its normal. (its rare it gets this bad) and I feel bad he had to clean up and is now looking after me. Do I just carry on like it didn't happen or do I talk to him about it? Would you get him something to say thank you? It feels wrong to recognize a bright side in the story you tell...but there is one: Your boyfriend has witnessed (what I am guessing is the effect of the very logical cause ... and he was on auto-pilot like the pro, and the solid individual he is) YOU sorta need to 'complete' the picture by standing confident with regard to your entire being... flaws and all... and (GIVE him the gesture of both showing your vulnerability and being comfortable having done so in front of him. ) It's an ongoing process... and you will get better at getting the right mindset.
Author Kirsty-Nicole Posted September 13, 2020 Author Posted September 13, 2020 He makes me feel so comfy. I am still bad after the attack (Going out yesterday took it out of me but I did insist!) and this morning I wake up to breakfast in bed. A delicious gluten free breakfast. I know I need to relax about the situation but I really have realised how much I love him until this happened. I also realised how much he must love me. 2
Fox Sake Posted September 13, 2020 Posted September 13, 2020 In the words of someone great - sh*t happens! This guy clearly loves you and supports you. You’ve nothing to embarrassed about really. Be thankful you found someone who unconditionally shows you love and support . It’s a dying breed these days. You scored!
Angelle Posted September 13, 2020 Posted September 13, 2020 14 hours ago, lana-banana said: This man is 100% a keeper. He did those things because he's a decent man and he loves you very much, and he isn't embarrassed or disgusted by your medical condition - he's a mature adult. Maybe buy a nice thank-you card (the fancy kind that are like $8, with sequins or designs or whatever) and write a note saying how much you appreciate it, but leave it at that, because he doesn't want you making a big deal of it either. Again: this guy is a keeper. It's so great that you've found each other. A dear friend once woke up in the middle of the night with severe, intense food-poisoning diarrhea on his third date with a woman. The woman woke up, took a look at the soiled sheets, just said "okay, let's get these into the wash" and did laundry while he showered. They're married now. I know a woman, who used to write a blog about her dating life. This was about a decade ago. She met this guy at a bar, went home with him, got sick in his bathtub at some point - he just bought a new bath mat, and didn't make her feel bad at all. I think they've been married for six years now. 1
Author Kirsty-Nicole Posted September 13, 2020 Author Posted September 13, 2020 5 minutes ago, Angelle said: I know a woman, who used to write a blog about her dating life. This was about a decade ago. She met this guy at a bar, went home with him, got sick in his bathtub at some point - he just bought a new bath mat, and didn't make her feel bad at all. I think they've been married for six years now. He hasn't made me feel bad one bit. I've had ex's that had made me feel really bad for having this condition (Like I picked to have it), one even fed me gluten to control me! When we had plans and I had an attack exs would moan and make me feel bad. We had plans for today and we are watching Netflix instead. One positive that has come about this my boyfriend asked if I wanted to move in on a more permanent basis. I said yes. Apart from home with my mum and dad this is the only other place I feel safe.
OnlyHonesty Posted September 13, 2020 Posted September 13, 2020 I see a lot of people saying that the guy is a keeper, or that you should marry him. But his actions in an isolated moment do not tell you much at all. The question is whether his actions are consistent, is he always this way in other areas of the relationship. I know a woman that suffered a health problem which meant she could not look after herself temporarily and her bf jumped into action. He drove her to hospital, comforted her, cooked her meals, and was there for her every single step of the way........they are in the process of splitting up. 1
Author Kirsty-Nicole Posted September 13, 2020 Author Posted September 13, 2020 3 minutes ago, OnlyHonesty said: I see a lot of people saying that the guy is a keeper, or that you should marry him. But his actions in an isolated moment do not tell you much at all. The question is whether his actions are consistent, is he always this way in other areas of the relationship. I know a woman that suffered a health problem which meant she could not look after herself temporarily and her bf jumped into action. He drove her to hospital, comforted her, cooked her meals, and was there for her every single step of the way........they are in the process of splitting up. He is always looking after me, even when he isn't there. He got me a medical bracelet when we had a heart to heart very early on. He treats me like a queen. He treats me with respect and love. He really is the best boyfriend ever.
HadMeOverABarrel Posted September 15, 2020 Posted September 15, 2020 On 9/12/2020 at 12:19 PM, Kirsty-Nicole said: He replied he can easily get replacements from Amazon or Dunelm and last time he checked they don't stock replacements of me. Super charming thing to say! I think your guy possibly is a Disney prince come to life. You're a lucky girl!
Trail Blazer Posted September 15, 2020 Posted September 15, 2020 He's a good dude. Don't take him for granted. There'd be many women ready to take your place.
Ruby Slippers Posted September 15, 2020 Posted September 15, 2020 On 9/13/2020 at 11:30 AM, OnlyHonesty said: I see a lot of people saying that the guy is a keeper, or that you should marry him. But his actions in an isolated moment do not tell you much at all. The question is whether his actions are consistent, is he always this way in other areas of the relationship. I totally agree with you that just one positive event does not a keeper make. But it's looking good that's she been with him for 10 months and he consistently treats her with an exceptional degree of caring and respect. It's no guarantee that an ugly side won't come out years down the line, but it's looking pretty good for them so far.
Fletch Lives Posted September 15, 2020 Posted September 15, 2020 There is something called pity love / damsel in distress, where a person's interest level is raised when someone has a problem.........I'm betting you actually raised his love level toward you by getting sick. Way to go girl, you are really workin' it! lol! (I'll bet you did not see it like this!) Some dating disasters can be a blessing in disguise!
Author Kirsty-Nicole Posted September 15, 2020 Author Posted September 15, 2020 He is always lovely towards me, Times when others would have blown their tops at some of the things I've done (I broke his car. where it needed to go in to the garage) and his ugly side? Gave me an extra big cuddle and told me not to worry. Had my mum and dad visit today today. My dad did made a joke when I explained everything that I'm getting him used to kids and my mum thought I was pregnant. I just said "I'm a little bloated" My boyfriends made me feel comfy about it, that its ok to get ill.
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