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Is it legal for a former adult teacher to seek out a relationship with a 17-year old former pupil in the UK?

fred123

By fred123
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Fox Sake Established Member

Fox Sake

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Legal? Yes in the U.K.  

Morally acceptable? No  

she’s 17. She’s a child still and that’s pretty predatory behaviour if you’re 30  

 

However- the age gap is more than acceptable but not at her age. If you want someone 13 years younger than you then wait until you’re older and don’t date teenagers in your 30’s 

 

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Velvet teddy Established Member

Velvet teddy

Posted
Posted (edited)
On 9/5/2020 at 11:30 AM, fred123 said:

30

I have male friends in their early 30s who talk about young teens 17/18year olds...i just find it wrong. Not only that but what would you find in common with a female in that age group. 

No offence but you shouldn't be teaching at all, if you can't maintain a certain level of professionalism and decency. 

As for this girl. Let her be. 

Edited by Velvet teddy
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balletomane Established Member

balletomane

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3 hours ago, Fox Sake said:

Legal? Yes in the U.K.  

Morally acceptable? No  

she’s 17. She’s a child still and that’s pretty predatory behaviour if you’re 30.

 

Depending on how he got in touch with her, it could be a breach of the UK's data protection legislation. If he used his position as a teacher to get hold of her contact details without her permission (e.g. from school records) then he's on shaky ground. If he looked her up on social media, then he's well into creep territory and potential employers wouldn't like it, but it's not technically against the law. I agree it's predatory, and I'm concerned that OP seems more worried about the legalities of the situation than the ethics of pursuing a minor he used to teach.

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Noproblem Established Member

Noproblem

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Posted

Don't ruin your beautiful image .. The beautiful image that she painted about you, a nice teacher who cares. She is 17 and such images stays forever.

if she was 22 and you were 30, I would say , yeah there is an age gap, but it's not a big deal

but 30 and 17

teenager and adult?

no!

JRabbit Established Member

JRabbit

Posted
Posted

OMG, please remove yourself as a teacher if you find teenagers attractive. Wrong on so many levels.

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elaine567 Established Member

elaine567

Posted
Posted
On 9/6/2020 at 6:02 PM, Noproblem said:

Don't ruin your beautiful image .. The beautiful image that she painted about you, a nice teacher who cares. She is 17 and such images stays forever

I agree and I would be so disappointed and creeped out if I  thought the male teachers I liked at school only helped me and were  nice to me because they were lusting after my boobs and a$$ and were thinking they could use me for fun/sex... 

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CaliforniaGirl Established Member

CaliforniaGirl

Posted
Posted

(If you're in the U.S.) if you were very close in age it would be less punishable but she's not 18 yet. 

I think (not sure) that you can date a former pupil if she is not at your school, or if you're not, once she's of the age of majority. Professions such as a psychiatrist and his patient have a required waiting period, 7 years or something.

1. Why don't you look this up to be certain of the law in your area?

2. Wait until she's 18, if you must go there. You're 30. Yeah, bad things could happen, if her parents want them to. And you could be blacklisted from teaching, even if informally.

CaliforniaGirl Established Member

CaliforniaGirl

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, elaine567 said:

I agree and I would be so disappointed and creeped out if I  thought the male teachers I liked at school only helped me and were  nice to me because they were lusting after my boobs and a$$ and were thinking they could use me for fun/sex... 

Yeah...Once or twice I had crushes on my teachers but thinking about actual physical stuff and not just sitting there sighing happily as they talked JUST TO ME (ooh!) was...gross...

It must not be gross to everyone as there's a tradition of the college professor and the student.

But...17?

Eeew, come on now. I don't care if she seems into it or not (authority and daddy issues?) - DON'T...that's still technically a child, and her brain has not fully developed to being able to make such discernments. 17-year-olds flame away, it's a fact.

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CaliforniaGirl Established Member

CaliforniaGirl

Posted
Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, JRabbit said:

OMG, please remove yourself as a teacher if you find teenagers attractive. Wrong on so many levels.

Honestly (sorry to serial post)...don't nobody want that sort of legal drama...so to speak. NO school is going to want to hire a teacher, former or not, who is 30 and hoping to soon have sex with a 17-year-old former student. Lawsuit city - if he ends up trying it at a school he IS teaching at - and school reputation right into the toilet. Who's going to want to send a student to a school that didn't see this weirdness slip right under their radar? 

Edited by CaliforniaGirl
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SincereOnlineGuy Established Member

SincereOnlineGuy

Posted
Posted
5 hours ago, JRabbit said:

OMG, please remove yourself as a teacher if you find teenagers attractive. Wrong on so many levels.

ROFL 

 

yeah,  we can't let word get back to the teenagers that they could possibly be attractive.

 

"Teen"   and  "Seventeen"   magazine sales would be greatly reduced... and everyone knows that  "Cosmo"   circulation would suffer a similar hit a few years down the road.

SincereOnlineGuy Established Member

SincereOnlineGuy

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, CaliforniaGirl said:

 NO school is going to want to hire a teacher, former or not, who is 30 and hoping to soon have sex with a 17-year-old former student. Lawsuit city - if he ends up trying it at a school he IS teaching at - and school reputation right into the toilet. Who's going to want to send a student to a school that didn't see this weirdness slip right under their radar? 

 

Just had to look-up the status of the 17yo girl who was a great ahead of me... and my English  teacher who is still 15 years older than her.

Still married decades later.  (or at least, sharing the same last name and living at the same house)

 

Although, now that I think back...   I heard from another teacher, about him...

"there was an incident   on a Friday (a few years later, and involving a different female student)  and he resigned  on the following Tuesday".

 

Ugh!

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CaliforniaGirl Established Member

CaliforniaGirl

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, SincereOnlineGuy said:

ROFL 

 

yeah,  we can't let word get back to the teenagers that they could possibly be attractive.

 

"Teen"   and  "Seventeen"   magazine sales would be greatly reduced... and everyone knows that  "Cosmo"   circulation would suffer a similar hit a few years down the road.

Teen and Seventeen focus on teens going out with their classmates and Cosmo is definitely not aimed at schoolgirls.

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SincereOnlineGuy Established Member

SincereOnlineGuy

Posted
Posted
21 hours ago, CaliforniaGirl said:

Teen and Seventeen focus on teens going out with their classmates and Cosmo is definitely not aimed at schoolgirls.

 

OK, how does that relate to what I wrote ???

CaliforniaGirl Established Member

CaliforniaGirl

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, SincereOnlineGuy said:

 

OK, how does that relate to what I wrote ???

It relates to what you wrote because you said (?? sarcastically) that teenagers are attractive, and then you listed those magazines.

I pointed out that each is age-appropriate (the freshman girl being interested in the sophomore boy, for example).

This thread is about a  30-year-old wanting a 17-year-old...which has zip in common with those age-appropriate magazines. 

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