Amanda141 Posted August 29, 2020 Posted August 29, 2020 Hello guys. I am feeling a little sad today, as my summer is ending tomorrow. I am an Italian girl (23 years old) living in the UK, but I spent July and August in Spain, as I had found a summer job there. When I first came here, I didn't know anyone, so I downloaded Tinder. I didn't really have any expectations, and the first days were rather disappointing: all the guys writing the same things, just wanting to have sex immediately without even wanting to know anything about me. I was on the verge of giving up, when one day I matched with a guy whom I immediately felt was different. Since from the very first messages we discovered to have many things in common and to share the same values. He kept asking me questions about my life, why I ended up in Spain, my plans for the future and son on. We met after three days of texting and we hit it off: as soon as I saw him I knew that something nice could start. At the end of the date we shared a passionate kiss... I was smitten! We met two days later, where he gave me a tour of the city, had dinner together and then ended up romantically kissing at the beach... I felt just like in a movie, like Grease. On our fourth date we had sex, as we both wanted it so much, and it was the best of my life. During this month together we did so many things, we went swimming in the sea, had dinner together, rented a motorbike to ride around the city, he helped me improve my Spanish... and talked every single day. He is very sensitive, one-of-a-kind and very charming... I was immediately head over heels for him. Yesterday we met one last time to say goodbye. In September I am going back to Manchester to work, and with all of this coronavirus situation we both know it's very hard to continue the relationship. We agreed to remain friends and who knows, maybe in the future when everything will be better we could meet again. This was my very first summer fling, and knowing that it had an "expire date", I enjoyed everything even more... right now I am a bit sad, yesterday when I had to say goodbye I couldn't stop crying (also him), but at the moment I know that a long-distance relationship is realistically not possible, first because in general I don't like them, second because of the virus, and third because we have known each other just a month, which is not a lot. However, I will always hold these wonderful memories in my heart What about you guys? Have you ever had a summer fling? How was it?
Wiseman2 Posted August 29, 2020 Posted August 29, 2020 It's bittersweet, but you'll savor the memories you made. 2
CaliforniaGirl Posted August 29, 2020 Posted August 29, 2020 1 minute ago, Wiseman2 said: It's bittersweet, but you'll savor the memories you made. ^ Yes. I definitely had summer flings, but back when I was in school. People would all gather while school was out, maybe you'd meet someone who was on vacation. Or you were. You both knew it couldn't possibly go permanent but it was wonderful anyway...sweet memories... I'm so sorry you're sad. IMO that isn't weird at all. In the years after this one you'll look back on this and smile to yourself, remembering that awesome feeling that really was mostly intense *because* you knew you both had very little time 1
smackie9 Posted August 29, 2020 Posted August 29, 2020 Sure I had many in my teenage years. But nothing heart felt like yours. It was just for fun and fun is what I had.
Ami1uwant Posted August 29, 2020 Posted August 29, 2020 It happens. It was more common pre social media/ cell phone/ email days where keeping in touch was much harder 1
Mystery4u Posted August 29, 2020 Posted August 29, 2020 Had plenty. I have to say im very confused why you both don't even seem to want to give a relationship a try after having such a great time together. If you both like each other as much as you say then stop making excuses and at least try to make it work. Nothing you have posted stops you from trying to be together.
CaliforniaGirl Posted August 29, 2020 Posted August 29, 2020 39 minutes ago, Mystery4u said: Had plenty. I have to say im very confused why you both don't even seem to want to give a relationship a try after having such a great time together. If you both like each other as much as you say then stop making excuses and at least try to make it work. Nothing you have posted stops you from trying to be together. Yes it does. She's going back to England.
Mystery4u Posted August 29, 2020 Posted August 29, 2020 3 hours ago, CaliforniaGirl said: Yes it does. She's going back to England. And? Didn't realise being in a relationship with someone in a different country to you was a crime or impossible
CaliforniaGirl Posted August 29, 2020 Posted August 29, 2020 (edited) 10 minutes ago, Mystery4u said: And? Didn't realise being in a relationship with someone in a different country to you was a crime or impossible It's not a crime. It isn't impossible. It is VERY difficult. Yes. There are reasons she may not want to try for an LDR that will mostly be talking. You said nothing stops them from "trying." Yes. Something does. Edited August 29, 2020 by CaliforniaGirl 3
Author Amanda141 Posted August 30, 2020 Author Posted August 30, 2020 Yes, I agree with @CaliforniaGirl. Long distance relationships are never easy, let alone now during this pandemic At this point, with things chaning every day, I am not even sure if I will be able to come back to Italy (my hometown) for the Christmas holidays... This summer fling may have lasted only about a month, but I will treasure the memories in my heart forever. "He who kisses joy as it flies by will live in eternity's sunrise." 1
Giovane Posted August 30, 2020 Posted August 30, 2020 (edited) Have I ever had a summer fling? Yes, I have, and we both felt like crying when I left. But as it turned out, we were both serious enough about it to manage to see each other regularly. It became a LDR (spanning two continents) that lasted 6 years. So my advice to you is, if you feel serious about that guy, don't give up just yet. Give it a shot! Edited August 30, 2020 by Giovane
Watercolors Posted August 30, 2020 Posted August 30, 2020 I've had several summer flings in my early days. Ah, to be young again. None of mine ever turned into anything long-term. But they were sure fun and memorable. If you and he are serious about continuing on, you'll take the necessary steps: 1. Call each other on the phone (none of this texting nonsense) 2) video call each other (how fun is that) and 3) when you have the time off and can afford it, go visit each other.
poppyfields Posted August 30, 2020 Posted August 30, 2020 (edited) Yes I had a fling similar to yours while traveling through Europe in my early 20s. I would say the reason why it was so romantic and passionate was precisely because it had an expiration date. Treasure the memory, it sounds beautiful.. Edited August 30, 2020 by poppyfields 2
Mystery4u Posted August 30, 2020 Posted August 30, 2020 8 hours ago, amanda141 said: Yes, I agree with @CaliforniaGirl. Long distance relationships are never easy, let alone now during this pandemic At this point, with things chaning every day, I am not even sure if I will be able to come back to Italy (my hometown) for the Christmas holidays... This summer fling may have lasted only about a month, but I will treasure the memories in my heart forever. "He who kisses joy as it flies by will live in eternity's sunrise." That's a very negative and pessimistic view. I guess your feelings for each other are not that strong after all. I started a relationship with someone on the other side of the world in March, when I was in her country. Yea we haven't seen each other since then, but there is no way I would let distance or the current situation stop us from what we both want, which is to be together for ever. I am a BOSS though who makes impossible dreams become reality.
Author Amanda141 Posted August 30, 2020 Author Posted August 30, 2020 @Mystery4u That's a great story to hear! I am very happy for you and I wish you and your girlfriend the best However, I know myself: I am 23, about to start my very first job in a foreign country, so what I would love right now would be seeing my partner regularly, not just having to videocall and being physically distant, since I am already far away from my family and friends. I know that I would suffer more. This is a subjective matter: for me LDR are not an option right now, but I know that many people (like you for example) are fine with them, so it depends 3
basil67 Posted August 30, 2020 Posted August 30, 2020 1 hour ago, Mystery4u said: That's a very negative and pessimistic view. I guess your feelings for each other are not that strong after all. That's a very judgemental view. I think what you meant to say is that you understand that different people have different needs and that's OK. @amanda141 I had a hot holiday fling in the '80s and still remember it fondly. I think there's something about the summer vibes which makes it extra special at the time. 3
Author Amanda141 Posted August 31, 2020 Author Posted August 31, 2020 @basil67 yes, I agree! In summer everything feels different 2
poppyfields Posted August 31, 2020 Posted August 31, 2020 13 minutes ago, amanda141 said: @basil67 yes, I agree! In summer everything feels different I think when traveling in a different country, everything feels different too! Winter flings are just as exciting, when away from your home turf. Cherish the memory... 2
CaliforniaGirl Posted September 1, 2020 Posted September 1, 2020 (edited) On 8/30/2020 at 1:55 PM, Mystery4u said: That's a very negative and pessimistic view. I guess your feelings for each other are not that strong after all. I started a relationship with someone on the other side of the world in March, when I was in her country. Yea we haven't seen each other since then, but there is no way I would let distance or the current situation stop us from what we both want, which is to be together for ever. I am a BOSS though who makes impossible dreams become reality. Okay. Not everyone feels this way. Many people want to be there with their partners, doing things together. Touching one another. So LDRs are not for everybody. She may be boss at making her own dreams come true, who knows. We do know that an LDR that's in two different countries is not one of her dreams. I don't blame her. But everyone is different. Edited September 1, 2020 by CaliforniaGirl 3
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