Wiseman2 Posted August 23, 2020 Posted August 23, 2020 Take this the right way. Get to a dentist for an exam and cleaning. Some people have bad breath from dental or other health problems but of course can't sense it themselves. Make sure your diet is not full of rank foods and that your oral hygiene is good. Whether he ends up kissing you or not, you'll be that much healthier. BTW it's amazing how many people have garlic, onion, coffee, etc breath. 1
Eternal Sunshine Posted August 23, 2020 Posted August 23, 2020 Few years back, I was dating a guy and we went to his house to have sex. He didn't kiss me at all but just started to kiss my neck and take my clothes off. I stopped him and attempted to kiss him. He just said "no kissing please". I felt so insulted that I told him "I am not a prostitute" and got my things and left. He later texted me to apologize and to say that he has a germ phobia but will try next time. I decided not to see him again. But yeah, even with FWBs there is extensive kissing involved in my experience. 3
poppyfields Posted August 23, 2020 Posted August 23, 2020 (edited) I was gonna suggest germ phobia as well, but damn, guy has no issue performing oral so that excuse doesn't quite cut it. Not sure if it's bad oral hygiene, OP doesn't seem like the type to ignore that or not be aware of it. Course one never knows, it's possible. This might boil down to he thinks you're a bad kisser, not his style, he tried, did not enjoy. Course it takes two, I'm curious, when you did kiss, did you enjoy it? Did you find it as awkward and distasteful as he did? Edited August 23, 2020 by poppyfields 1
Author HopefullyLove Posted August 23, 2020 Author Posted August 23, 2020 1 hour ago, poppyfields said: I was gonna suggest germ phobia as well, but damn, guy has no issue performing oral so that excuse doesn't quite cut it. Not sure if it's bad oral hygiene, OP doesn't seem like the type to ignore that or not be aware of it. Course one never knows, it's possible. This might boil down to he thinks you're a bad kisser, not his style, he tried, did not enjoy. Course it takes two, I'm curious, when you did kiss, did you enjoy it? Did you find it as awkward and distasteful as he did? Well his kissing style was tongue and really fast and mine was more slow lol. I like to work my way up tongue. I don’t see how that would just make someone not want to kiss again, I never kissed him...we have to learn each other. That’s how I think you get to learn by actually doing right? What do you all think? I do brush and floss so I can assure you my breath isn’t bad lol. I was with my same partner for almost two decades so I get we are all different but how can we learn each other if we just give up? Now that you mention, he did mention our kissing was awkward but damn, how can it become “natural” if we don’t do it? 1
kismetkismet Posted August 23, 2020 Posted August 23, 2020 (edited) Is it possible that he sensed that YOU don't like kissing - hence the question asking whether or not you do? If he's an aggressive kisser, he may have felt like you were 'fending him off' a bit (I have quite literally jerked my head away from aggressive tongue kissers so I don't blame you lol). Either way, you're exactly right that the only way to get on the same kissing page is practice! Edited August 23, 2020 by kismetkismet 1
Author HopefullyLove Posted August 23, 2020 Author Posted August 23, 2020 3 hours ago, kismetkismet said: Is it possible that he sensed that YOU don't like kissing - hence the question asking whether or not you do? If he's an aggressive kisser, he may have felt like you were 'fending him off' a bit (I have quite literally jerked my head away from aggressive tongue kissers so I don't blame you lol). Either way, you're exactly right that the only way to get on the same kissing page is practice! He just mentioned it was awkward....we were both nervous so....I think for me I have to spend more in person time with him outside of physical intimacy, I don't think the phone is a substitute for that so I have learned to move differently.
WesHightower Posted September 7, 2020 Posted September 7, 2020 I’ve been on both sides of this. I had a girlfriend who I was super attracted to sexually but I just didn’t have the desire to kiss her, to the point where during intimacy she would sort of protest ‘kiss me!’. I was fairly young at the time and really couldn’t understand why I did t want to kiss her. I don’t want to go as far as to say it grossed me out but it’s sort of along those lines. She was very troubled, had been in quite a few bad relationships and was very moody. Eventually I figured out that I was with her more out of a sort of pity rather than love for her, and this wasn’t fair for either of us. I guess the lack of desire to kiss her was my brain telling me that I really shouldn’t be with her. Like I said though, I was young and had a lot to learn. years later I had a girlfriend who I could have fallen deeply for but I knew she just wasn’t as into me. For me, everything about the relationship was good- I loved having sex with her, we had a similar sense of humor, we laughed and had so much fun together, I would have married her- she was everything I could have wanted except she just wasn’t (and she confirmed toward this toward the end) ‘in love’ with me. And one of the things was that she just wouldn’t kiss me. One time we were standing in a bar sort of bickering -I was in a bad mood and somehow it came up. I said ‘yeah right , you never even kiss me, not really kiss me” I think just sort of out of spite she just laid one on me, a deep long kiss. Omg, it was sooooo. good but it just made me feel worse because it was like knowing how good it could be but knowing you can’t have it. Eventually I moved on. I hated to give her up but she was never going to be in love with me. This was so long ago but I still think of her more than any woman in my past. I always thought that I never let myself really fall for her but maybe I did. It doesn’t hurt to think about her but there was a thrill with her that I miss and I’ve never experienced since. I have been married and divorced once and the beginning of the end was me not really desiring to kiss my wife. For me, kissing someone is more intimate than sex. i think if you are really into someone you can’t help but want to kiss them passionately, it’s like you want to ‘take in’ everything about them. If you don’t, you really have to question if you are really that into them.
CaliforniaGirl Posted September 8, 2020 Posted September 8, 2020 (edited) That's just strange. It wouldn't be my style and if I had to ASK him to kiss me before boning me I'd definitely be walking. There are a lot of weird posts tonight, just saying. , Just no much are people willing to put up with, really? Edited September 8, 2020 by CaliforniaGirl
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