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Feeling disconnected to my boyfriend


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Posted
2 hours ago, d0nnivain said:

Since he has expressed a desire to make this work, ask him what that looks like to him.  Do NOT have this conversation through text.  Have it in person. If you try to deal with an emotional minefield like this via text you are guaranteed to fail.  

Yes. He ended up calling me, saying he wants to work himself in order to be better for me. I asked him what being better for me looked like and he said communicate better to me. I respect that but I’m still feeling hurt. I just need alone time for a while

Posted

OK but you probably need to be specific with him out how you want his better communication to look.  I had to do this with my husband.  You have to spell it out. 

I explained  that I wanted a few things: 

1.  Kisses hello & good bye; ILYs when we part. 

2.  Cards on birthdays & holidays

3.  Trusting me to listen & be there when he has a problem; no more going it alone 

4.  Listening when I'm upset & not necessarily trying to fix it; hugging me when I'm crying  

Don't just give some vague response. Make it concrete. 

Posted
1 hour ago, Taz1985 said:

Yes. He ended up calling me, saying he wants to work himself in order to be better for me. I asked him what being better for me looked like and he said communicate better to me. I respect that but I’m still feeling hurt. I just need alone time for a while

If he has to fix himself and make changes (which will be temporary of course) in order to get along, then you two are simply not compatible.

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