cloy247 Posted July 16, 2020 Posted July 16, 2020 (edited) My fwb and I started out as friends and he told me he liked me late last year but neither of us were ready for a relationship. We hooked up earlier this year which made me realise that I liked him more than I was letting on. Even then, we never tried to define the relationship because I thought being fwbs was something we were both happy with at that time. However, because of the pandemic and a family emergency, I had to fly home. Honestly, I was kinda sad and thought things would be over because of the long distance but we stayed in contact (discussing school work amongst other things). Amazingly, we still text and call occasionally and he even tells me he misses me. I have no idea if he actually means it though but I'm quite sure I still have feelings for him even it's been 4 months since I left. We're not dating so I have no right to stop him from meeting other girls but of course I don't want him to. I don't even know when I'm gonna see him because of closed borders and unsettled issues at home. Should I ask him to wait for me and how should I do it if I'm not exactly a direct person? Or should I forget about him and move on? Edited July 16, 2020 by cloy247
Velvet teddy Posted July 16, 2020 Posted July 16, 2020 4 minutes ago, cloy247 said: My fwb and I started out as friends and he told me he liked me late last year but neither of us were ready for a relationship. We hooked up earlier this year which made me realise that I liked him more than I was letting on. Even then, we never tried to define the relationship because I thought being fwbs was something we were both happy with at that time. However, because of the pandemic and a family emergency, I had to fly home. Honestly, I was kinda sad and thought things would be over because of the long distance but we stayed in contact (discussing school work amongst other things). Amazingly, we still text and call occasionally and he even tells me he misses me. I have no idea if he actually means it though but I'm quite sure I still have feelings for him even it's been 4 months since I left. We're not dating so I have no right to stop him from meeting other girls but of course I don't want him to. I don't even know when I'm gonna see him because of closed borders and unsettled issues at home. Should I ask him to wait for me and how should I do it if I'm not exactly a direct person? Or should I forget about him and move on? If you like him tell him. I don't think you should tell him to wait for you though. Give him the info he needs and let him decide if he will wait or move on. 1
Author cloy247 Posted July 16, 2020 Author Posted July 16, 2020 yeah I meant like if I should ask him how he feelings about waiting for me till I get to be back
Ami1uwant Posted July 16, 2020 Posted July 16, 2020 33 minutes ago, cloy247 said: yeah I meant like if I should ask him how he feelings about waiting for me till I get to be back Yep....
Realitysux Posted July 16, 2020 Posted July 16, 2020 (edited) Forget him An ldr would be ideal for me since I don't want to be with someone a large amount of time during the week and I don't want to be in constant contact with anyone but that means a two hour drive or something. I'm not putting money towards flights to see a man. If a relationship starts off as a fwb then move on. Men know within a few days if they want more from you or not. I've had fwb and they don't last long before i am getting called daily to hang out. I'm not being high on myself, i am telling you that a fwb means he's not into you. Edited July 16, 2020 by Realitysux
d0nnivain Posted July 16, 2020 Posted July 16, 2020 Why can't you leave things as they are, building but not putting words around it? I would have the discussion when you see each other again. If you really can't wait, at least have this discussion via video. I don't know how he feels but I guarantee this, if you try to change things via text, it will fail.
Realitysux Posted July 16, 2020 Posted July 16, 2020 Depending on where he's at in life. It might be unfair to ask someone to wait for you.
d0nnivain Posted July 16, 2020 Posted July 16, 2020 3 hours ago, cloy247 said: yeah I meant like if I should ask him how he feelings about waiting for me till I get to be back I'd wait to ask until you two can be together. A deep emotional conversation like this you need all the non-verbal cues that are present in a face to face conversation. If you feel this is burning inside you, at least have a video chat. Whatever you do, do not even attempt to have this discussion via text. I promise if you attempt to text or What'sApp about this, it will blow up in your face & destroy everything .
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