Asking a girl her ring size or for input into an engagement ring....

[fluidian]

I’m wondering what experiences people have had involving their significant other in sizing and / or selecting an engagement ring prior to a proposal. 
 

Is asking them their ring size or for input into what they like a good or bad  idea?
 

if you pulled them into the process prior to a proposal (or were pulled in yourself), I’d love to hear about whether or not you felt it worked well or ruined the experience.  
 

Thanks!

[Art_Critic]

IMO...You don't ask her size, you buy the ring and then she takes it and has it sized to fit her finger where you bought it, a jeweler will change the size to fit any finger.

[major_merrick]

My husband had me involved for sizing.  And because I'm not really into jewelry and needed something that was practically indestructible. 

One way to go if you're wanting to do it in a more discreet way, is to get matching "promise" rings.  You can do that together as a way of saying "I'm not leaving" or "we're exclusive" but without the intensity of engagement.  My husband did that with his first wife when they were going to be separated for a few months.  Then he was able to buy the engagement ring and have it ready when he returned. 

If you go the way of having the ring sized later, I suspect getting a ring that's too small is easier than getting one that's too big.  Jewelers have a cone-shaped device that expands rings, whereas making one smaller will involve cutting and re-attaching.  I think....again, not a jewelry person. 

[Crazelnut]

Swipe one of her rings she doesn't wear all the time and take it to a jeweler to size it. Return her ring and go buy an engagement ring in the correct size.

[d0nnivain]

You don't even have to swipe it & take it out of the house if you think she will notice.  Take it out of the jewelry box & trace it on a piece of paper -- inside circle & outside circumference.  Take the tracing to a jeweler.  

You may want to get her input about shape of diamond & color of metal.  

[Els]

 Umm, H straight-up just measured my finger one day... I have no other rings, so he couldn't use the "measure the other ring" method, but you could if your partner does have them. It did not affect the experience for me.

I once heard of someone taking a picture with a close-up of her hands holding a champagne flute, and giving it to the jeweler to estimate.

14 hours ago, Art_Critic said:

IMO...You don't ask her size, you buy the ring and then she takes it and has it sized to fit her finger where you bought it, a jeweler will change the size to fit any finger.

IMO this isn't a good idea if he doesn't even have a rough estimate. Some styles of ring and materials are easier to change the size of than others, and in some cases you wouldn't be able to easily increase or decrease more than 2-3 ring sizes.

Edited July 13, 2020 by Elswyth