JolliX Posted July 12, 2020 Posted July 12, 2020 With my recent breakup, something was brought to my attention. During the breakup conversation she stated that she didn't understand how I could have such facade of confidence. I didn't understand what she was talking about so she explained that when we met I was confident about so many things and now She felt that most things I just put up a facade of confidence but didn't seem to actually have any. This was said to me by another ex about 10 years ago, and I dismissed it as an incorrect perception on her part. But thinking about it, I am less confident now than I was going into the relationship, and the same is very likely true 10 years ago. I don't understand how I can lose so much confidence while being in a relationship, to the point that it has been impacting me for months, and I have become pessimistic (I normally float on the optimistic side of things, but do consider down sides, etc.). It is impacting me so much right now. Before the relationship I was pretty happy with my life. My job was the only thing I wasn't satisfied with, and it isn't because it isn't a good job, it pays alright and has great hours, I just want something with room to move up in both promotion and pay. Now I not only feel the weight of having a major life change (not having the ex in my life), but I feel despair that I'm not able to do what I would normally consider simple things. How can I be so happy and confident when I'm single and lose all that confidence when in a relationship? I'm at loss.
chillii Posted July 12, 2020 Posted July 12, 2020 Things are happening during the relationship that are for some reason bringing you undone. Something you'd really have to look at and think about yourself to figure out . Or translate it to your thread hare and maybe people can help you figure it out,. But seems it's happened in both , then it's about you .
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