What's with these guys and casual last minute meet-ups?

[girlnextdoor2020]

28 minutes ago, elaine567 said:

Were they mothers of small children like the OP is?
These guys knew she was as single mother yet they assumed she could drop everything for them...

I might be bitter and cynical about dating at the moment, and maybe I need to take some time off, agree with that.

But that does't mean I am not right when I see bulls***. I think I need some time off because I feel burned out too, and I need to date and let these things go easily instead of they getting to me so much.

I still think these guys were as***oles and I dodged a bullet, because yes, they knew I am a single mom so they shouldn't expect for me to be available just like that when it's convenient to them, but the way I get so mad about it just shows I need to step away from dating and take some time off.

I've had a very bad break-up nearly a year ago and I'm still not over it yet.

[Phallacy]

^^^
What Ruby said.

Learn not to be codependent.

It’s obvious you are still reeling after your breakup.

Most guys will not like dealing the aka b!tch shield. 

Paying the price for your last breakup isn’t cool either

Edited July 12, 2020 by Phallacy

[girlnextdoor2020]

Just now, Phallacy said:

^^^
What Ruby said.

Learn not to be codependent 

I'm not co-dependent at all. As I've said, I've had a bad break-up a year ago and I'm still not over it.

[poppyfields]

44 minutes ago, elaine567 said:

Were they mothers of small children like the OP is?
These guys knew she was as single mother yet they assumed she could drop everything for them...

I don't see where they "assumed" anything.

They wanted to meet her, and simply asked if she were free to meet.  

Honestly, I don't understand all these negative assumptions being made.

Disrespectful, selfish, expected the OP to drop everything -- where are all these negative assumptions coming from?

Serious question.  

The OP doesn't know them nor their motives, neither do any of us.

Including me!  

I guess if we're going to assume, why not assume something positive, like they were interested and looking forward to meeting her, so they asked.

Ok, that wasn't to her liking, fair enough.  Take a pass.

But they did nothing wrong or bad by simply asking to meet without "planning" in advance. 

Many first meets are handled that way, and they turn out to be successful long term relationships.

A bit of flexibility, patience and giving folks the benefit of the doubt goes a long way in being able to connect with others, whether OLD or real life.

 

 

Edited July 12, 2020 by poppyfields

[Versacehottie]

OP, has her own crazy limitations about wanting morning dates.  Um, most guys you would want to date have a job and that's where they are in the morning hopefully; otherwise she'd be on her complaining that he was broke.  All I can say is if someone backs herself into a small corner where she can see no one else's perspective but her own, she should expect a very limited pool of guys to chose from.  And with those guys, perhaps writing them off quickly for smaller offenses is more detrimental to her.  Not only in that she FURTHER reduces possible pool of guys who are potential for her but that it ADDITIONALLY contributes to a bitter mindset. 

I also think OP wants some kind of quick fix because one would have to assume on some level that this is a search for mr right and she is not young (i don't think) and single.where there is more dating going on. She has to be willing to do the work and put in the effort of the SEARCH.  I mean, I think just above she said that a guy she'd been talking to was a disappointment when she met him--said as if he had some obligation to show up as her prince charming rather than just who he is on the first coffee date--to me, that shows she has unrealistic expectations.  She might have to churn through hundreds of guys, meet some, date some for a while, all to find the right one.  If she has a filter, good, use it.  But to complain at same time that the guys are what she expected is a disservice to her being able to filter out bad fits for her.  She can't have it both waysotherwise that just makes her bitter and in a bad mindset.

[Versacehottie]

I would just add since she said they are both dads--that they are single parents as well.  So there goes that argument that she is the only one with s*t going on,.

Edited July 12, 2020 by Versacehottie

[girlnextdoor2020]

14 minutes ago, Versacehottie said:

OP, has her own crazy limitations about wanting morning dates.  Um, most guys you would want to date have a job and that's where they are in the morning hopefully; otherwise she'd be on her complaining that he was broke.  All I can say is if someone backs herself into a small corner where she can see no one else's perspective but her own, she should expect a very limited pool of guys to chose from.  And with those guys, perhaps writing them off quickly for smaller offenses is more detrimental to her.  Not only in that she FURTHER reduces possible pool of guys who are potential for her but that it ADDITIONALLY contributes to a bitter mindset. 

I also think OP wants some kind of quick fix because one would have to assume on some level that this is a search for mr right and she is not young (i don't think) and single.where there is more dating going on. She has to be willing to do the work and put in the effort of the SEARCH.  I mean, I think just above she said that a guy she'd been talking to was a disappointment when she met him--said as if he had some obligation to show up as her prince charming rather than just who he is on the first coffee date--to me, that shows she has unrealistic expectations.  She might have to churn through hundreds of guys, meet some, date some for a while, all to find the right one.  If she has a filter, good, use it.  But to complain at same time that the guys are what she expected is a disservice to her being able to filter out bad fits for her.  She can't have it both waysotherwise that just makes her bitter and in a bad mindset.

The morning thing was because the first guy is on holidays and free all day, and I am free in the mornings because my daughter is at a summer club until lunch time, so I can meet easily in the mornings. I told him that, so he knew it. But he still asked me to meet in the afternoon. 

Anyway, yes I do feel bitter and burned out by dating. I don't agree with you that I need to "churn through hundreds of guys, meet some, date some for a while, all to find the right one". I have done that and nothing good came out of it.

I believe the Universe doesn't need help and I can just meet the right guy at the right time without dating hundreds and draining my energy.

So having said that I am going to take my profiles down from OLD and take a break from dating and meeting guys. There's only one other guy I'm still talking to on WhatsApp (we haven't met in person) that I'll continue talking because he seems nice, but I won't talk to anyone new.

I do feel bitter and cynical because of my break up last year and feel difficult to be positive about men and dating. My ex asked me to marry him, gave me an engagement ring, promised the world to me, and then we had an argument when I was feeling very sick with a bacterial infection, and he basically left me on the spot. He was out the door and I never saw him again. A month later, he was already with a new woman, asked her to marry him 2 months after that and they got married 2 months later. I'm still healing from it, that's why I feel like this now.

I realise I cannot meet someone good and be happy with someone feeling like this. I want to get over it and trust men again, but am finding it really difficult.

Edited July 12, 2020 by girlnextdoor2020

[smackie9]

10 hours ago, enigma32 said:

See, I like that sort of thing! I think some kind of activity is a better way to get to know someone than just sitting down to dinner. Dinners just seem a bit too formal to me and are not conducive to a good first date. My favorite first date is to have a drink and play a game of pool or something. Walks are good too. A lot of nice nature walks around here. All better date ideas than just dinner and they usually cost less. 

Me...meet at a park bench on a nice summer evening with a tall one in a brown paper bag (drinking in LA!)

[smackie9]

8 minutes ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

 A month later, he was already with a new woman, asked her to marry him 2 months after that and they got married 2 months later.

I know a few who have done this. If it's any consolation the marriages only lasted 6 months.

[Versacehottie]

14 minutes ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

The morning thing was because the first guy is on holidays and free all day, and I am free in the mornings because my daughter is at a summer club until lunch time, so I can meet easily in the mornings. I told him that, so he knew it. But he still asked me to meet in the afternoon. 

Anyway, yes I do feel bitter and burned out by dating. I don't agree with you that I need to "churn through hundreds of guys, meet some, date some for a while, all to find the right one". I have done that and nothing good came out of it.

I believe the Universe doesn't need help and I can just meet the right guy at the right time without dating hundreds and draining my energy.

So having said that I am going to take my profiles down from OLD and take a break from dating and meeting guys. There's only one other guy I'm still talking to on WhatsApp (we haven't met in person) that I'll continue talking because he seems nice, but I won't talk to anyone new.

I do feel bitter and cynical because of my break up last year and feel difficult to be positive about men and dating. My ex asked me to marry him, gave me an engagement ring, promised the world to me, and then we had an argument when I was feeling very sick with a bacterial infection, and he basically left me on the spot. He was out the door and I never saw him again. A month later, he was already with a new woman, asked her to marry him 2 months after that and they got married 2 months later. I'm still healing from it, that's why I feel like this now.

I realise I cannot meet someone good and be happy with someone feeling like this.

Glad you are taking a break.  I think you have misinterpreted what i mean with the bolded though.  I mean not that you should churn through tons of guys to find this person but that you cannot expect that when you have a handful on the hook for meeting up with you that it will be any of those guys.  It will likely take much more effort and more people.  

You should lower your expectations for a simple first meet up when you go back to dating--since it could be still disappointing to not find your person or to not have a guy schedule in a way that is convenient for you--even if your mindset is improved by then.  If you lower your expectations on every and any one person, it should help your mindset to be open to meet up with more of them which will help your quest to find the right one.  It would be unlikely to find it right off the bat, even if the guy profess some level of mutual interest over a phone conversation, messaging or the first 5-10 dates, let's say.  Your standards that you have in place should GUIDE you to the right one but it doesn't mean you won't have to sift through the wrong ones--it's not a pass for that & not protection for having to deal with them at the most basic level.  It's just a tool so you can weed them out.  If it exists, you should be grateful for it, not curse the fact that it is WORKING.

Edited July 12, 2020 by Versacehottie

[poppyfields]

16 minutes ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

The morning thing was because the first guy is on holidays and free all day, and I am free in the mornings because my daughter is at a summer club until lunch time, so I can meet easily in the mornings. I told him that, so he knew it. But he still asked me to meet in the afternoon. 

Anyway, yes I do feel bitter and burned out by dating. I don't agree with you that I need to "churn through hundreds of guys, meet some, date some for a while, all to find the right one". I have done that and nothing good came out of it.

I believe the Universe doesn't need help and I can just meet the right guy at the right time without dating hundreds and draining my energy.

So having said that I am going to take my profiles down from OLD and take a break from dating and meeting guys. There's only one other guy I'm still talking to on WhatsApp (we haven't met in person) that I'll continue talking because he seems nice, but I won't talk to anyone new.

I do feel bitter and cynical because of my break up last year and feel difficult to be positive about men and dating. My ex asked me to marry him, gave me an engagement ring, promised the world to me, and then we had an argument when I was feeling very sick with a bacterial infection, and he basically left me on the spot. He was out the door and I never saw him again. A month later, he was already with a new woman, asked her to marry him 2 months after that and they got married 2 months later. I'm still healing from it, that's why I feel like this now.

I realise I cannot meet someone good and be happy with someone feeling like this. I want to get over it and trust men again, but am finding it really difficult.

I'm sorry GND .  About 5 years ago, I had a bad break up too, and after that a series of bad short term relationships.

I decided to take a long break, as I said, did me a world of good!  

Hopefully, it will for you too!  

Best to you and stay safe! 

Edited July 12, 2020 by poppyfields

[Ami1uwant]

3 hours ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

I don't know to be honest.

I divorced my daughter's dad nearly 6 years ago. Had a thing with a guy during a few months last year that ended badly, and went on many dates since and haven't met anyone I clicked with.

I don't even feel excited to date or meet anyone anymore. I feel drained and cynical now.

With this and other posts you sound like someone who nexts someone you meet for small petty reasons and come,aim you can’t fund peop,e but refuse to look in a mirror.

 

the comment above likely shows in texts and conversations you have.

[elaine567]

 

14 minutes ago, Ami1uwant said:

With this and other posts you sound like someone who nexts someone you meet for small petty reasons and come,aim you can’t fund peop,e but refuse to look in a mirror.

NO refusal to look in the mirror at all.

1 hour ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

I've had a very bad break-up nearly a year ago and I'm still not over it yet.

[d0nnivain]

GirlNextDoor 

Because you know you are still bitter & not over your last break up,  I think taking time off from dating is your best bet right now.  You are still too aggravated to see straight & the slightest provocation upsets you disproportionately.  

You are allowed to have standards & being heard is not an over the top requirement in a quality partner.

You tried the whole get over somebody by getting under somebody else, meaning you tried to get back out there.  It's not working for you.   Delete your profiles.  Enjoy the summer with your daughter.  Take some time to heal.  

In time, when you are ready, you can dip your toes back in the dating pool.  

[Ellener]

It sounds like you are on the road to healing @girlnextdoor2020 It can be a long road...I know.

If someone's not making you a priority in their day triggers emotions from the past then online dating is going to be weird and painful, not just a brief annoyance all have experienced.

But with the making/keeping appointments thing I can say I have found it's always been an irritating part of US culture to some extent ( maybe English too now, haven't lived there for years ) and definitely a younger generation thing; my grown up son annoys the crap out of me regularly by being unable to commit to stuff. I just ignore it because I love him anyway, but I think I'll leave a note with my Will or something: bet you wish you'd followed through with more of our plans now!

 

[CaliforniaGirl]

1 hour ago, Ami1uwant said:

With this and other posts you sound like someone who nexts someone you meet for small petty reasons and come,aim you can’t fund peop,e but refuse to look in a mirror.

 

the comment above likely shows in texts and conversations you have.

And yet they agreed to meet her. In the morning, actually.

OP, I'm sorry about your breakup. You're smart to do some introspection and not take it out on other guys. Have your break, get your footing.

[Velvet teddy]

2 hours ago, girlnextdoor2020 said:

The morning thing was because the first guy is on holidays and free all day, and I am free in the mornings because my daughter is at a summer club until lunch time, so I can meet easily in the mornings. I told him that, so he knew it. But he still asked me to meet in the afternoon. 

Anyway, yes I do feel bitter and burned out by dating. I don't agree with you that I need to "churn through hundreds of guys, meet some, date some for a while, all to find the right one". I have done that and nothing good came out of it.

I believe the Universe doesn't need help and I can just meet the right guy at the right time without dating hundreds and draining my energy.

So having said that I am going to take my profiles down from OLD and take a break from dating and meeting guys. There's only one other guy I'm still talking to on WhatsApp (we haven't met in person) that I'll continue talking because he seems nice, but I won't talk to anyone new.

I do feel bitter and cynical because of my break up last year and feel difficult to be positive about men and dating. My ex asked me to marry him, gave me an engagement ring, promised the world to me, and then we had an argument when I was feeling very sick with a bacterial infection, and he basically left me on the spot. He was out the door and I never saw him again. A month later, he was already with a new woman, asked her to marry him 2 months after that and they got married 2 months later. I'm still healing from it, that's why I feel like this now.

I realise I cannot meet someone good and be happy with someone feeling like this. I want to get over it and trust men again, but am finding it really difficult.

That's  terrible OP.

I don't even really blame ya now. 

Hopefully you can move past it and get on with your life. 

[emprosnet7]

I am new to online dating and I have sent messages/requests to ten ladies. I was very interested in one particular lady, the others probing.  

Seven out of ten did not respond at all. I am sure they are getting many requests from guys. The particular lady and one other responded / lied that they are married and the last one accepted my friend's request but I discovered that he was actually a dude, trans.

[CaliforniaGirl]

2 hours ago, Versacehottie said:

I would just add since she said they are both dads--that they are single parents as well.  So there goes that argument that she is the only one with s*t going on,.

So then how about "Hey! I know you asked for a morning but my daughter decided to go with her mom this affernoon. I know you get it about grabbing free time where you can...you wouldn't happen to have a few minutes today, would you? I'd love to finally meet you. If not then I get it, what day might work for you?"

Now that any single parent can understand (even if she can't make it) and it shows at least the very minimum of having heard the person's original request. (And having agreed to it, actually.)

It takes a literally TINY bit of effort to make a person feel heard and understood. Yeah...even a stranger. I get that you don't "owe" such a person anything yet but first impressions speak volumes. Just like people are claiming here that literally just the mention of.wanting a morning meet up would be a deal breaker and mean she must be "a princess." 

If these guys hated morning dates they could have just said no initially. Not sure why a person who thinks morning dates or coffee is undesirable but wouldn't say from the get-go, "Mornings are tough for me. How about drinks on Fri or Sat?" Or "My ex-wife has my kids on evenings X and Y, what's your schedule?"

I disagree with the OP going off on the first guy but she too gets that part was wrong. We've established that. Nobody here so far has agreed that they'd react that way.

These guys agreed to the morning date idea and both just ignored that. If that was because they thought she was an entitled princess (for wanting to have a date without the daughter there, LOL) then they could have solved it easily: they could have said "no, I don't do morning dates" et voilà.

Edited July 12, 2020 by CaliforniaGirl

[Versacehottie]

Sure the guys could have said it that way and it probably would have been better communication with whoever, especially the OP obviously.  It's just the extension of an invite and that's the big picture vs whether they were trying to convey disrespect with the invite so I doubt they thought so hard about it or that OP would take such offense to it.  Like donnivan said the OP's feelings about it were disproportionate.  I don't think a guy should tiptoe around how he is asking for what should be a good thing for both of them.  All she has to do is say no and remind him that it doesn't fit her schedule if she takes great issue with that part.  Maybe she is more greatly offended that they aren't working harder to meet her and make it easy and a smooth ride (for her)?  Depends on her qualifications for smooth.  I hardly think working out two schedules puts things into the not-smooth zone.  This happens in all walks of life over all sorts of things.  A power struggle of ways and just real facts of scheduling..  One or both of the guys could just be so disorganized that he forgot or his sense of morning is different than hers (that happens a lot).

I think a back and forth where she is effectively reminding them "i don't do morning dates" just cause they tried plants a seed of hostility that needn't be there.  "i can't do a morning date" is probably better when asked.  I also would suggest if she has such a huge issue with scheduling and is going to get nitpicky she should or could take the lead.  She left it open ended (which i get that she is more traditional and don't fault her for that) but then wants a total mindreader.  Why not just say, right when they decide on a future coffee date "mornings are best for me, let's do it thursday at 9am, would that work for you".  I think that people who are particular and not easy breezy should advocate to tip things in their favor for all the things they want--ie to date these guys or at least a first date AND in the morning hours---rather than get miffed when things don't magically go like that or be offended at an alternative suggestion. Another way to look at it, is that she would be able to gauge if it was actually disrespect or selfishness etc if she'd stood her ground on her schedule but arranged a date at some time that worked for her.  I'm going to guess one if not both of the guys would have met up at some other date in the future that worked for her schedule.  She just needed to kick the can down the road.  A little patience.

I think the guys agreed to the morning coffee date but it wasn't set so thus the implication that it was open enough that there was no harm in asking--which is IMO how she should have treated it back.  "lol, no harm in asking, but I can't do that right now, i'm busy with my daughter in the afternoons--what morning works for you?".

I think some of us think morning coffee dates are undesirable but nothing indicates that her dates do and neither does she so they should go for that.  At least they were on the same page about the type of date it was going to be

 

Edited July 12, 2020 by Versacehottie

[girlnextdoor2020]

I do like morning dates, especially as first dates, because it takes the pressure off. It doesn't have to be a coffee, it can be a walk or breakfast, or even a bicycle ride, etc. I also like dinner dates but more for second or third dates.

Anyway whilst I agree that my reaction was overreacting, I still didn't like what they did, it gave me bad vibes. But the fact it triggered certain bad emotions in me and I was kinda rude to them and also came here to vent tells me something is not right and I need to take a break from dating and OLD. I already deleted my profiles. 

I think I need to get to a place where I am positive, happy and excited about dating and meeting guys, and if a guy is not a match or does something I didn't like, it doesn't trigger me anything. I just say thank you but no and move on, no overreacting or coming here to vent, etc, I just move on calmly.

Until I get to that point I'm off meeting guys online because I feel drained, bitter and frustrated, and I just attract more of the same, like a vicious cycle.

There's just one guy with whom I am still talking and I get a good vibe from him. He asked me if I wanted to go for a walk next Saturday afternoon and I said yes, so I am going to leave my daughter with my mom that day and go meet him. Easy peasy if we arrange things in advance. So I'm going to meet him because I'm curious about him to be honest, but I am not meeting anyone else through OLD in the near future.

Edited July 12, 2020 by girlnextdoor2020

[CaliforniaGirl]

17 minutes ago, Versacehottie said:

Sure the guys could have said it that way and it probably would have been better communication with whoever, especially the OP obviously.  It's just the extension of an invite and that's the big picture vs whether they were trying to convey disrespect with the invite so I doubt they thought so hard about it or that OP would take such offense to it.  Like donnivan said the OP's feelings about it were disproportionate.  I don't think a guy should tiptoe around how he is asking for what should be a good thing for both of them.  All she has to do is say no and remind him that it doesn't fit her schedule if she takes great issue with that part.  Maybe she is more greatly offended that they aren't working harder to meet her and make it easy and a smooth ride (for her)?  Depends on her qualifications for smooth.  I hardly think working out two schedules puts things into the not-smooth zone.  This happens in all walks of life over all sorts of things.  A power struggle of ways and just real facts of scheduling..  One or both of the guys could just be so disorganized that he forgot or his sense of morning is different than hers (that happens a lot).

I think a back and forth where she is effectively reminding them "i don't do morning dates" just cause they tried plants a seed of hostility that needn't be there.  "i can't do a morning date" is probably better when asked.  I also would suggest if she has such a huge issue with scheduling and is going to get nitpicky she should or could take the lead.  She left it open ended (which i get that she is more traditional and don't fault her for that) but then wants a total mindreader.  Why not just say, right when they decide on a future coffee date "mornings are best for me, let's do it thursday at 9am, would that work for you".  I think that people who are particular and not easy breezy should advocate to tip things in their favor for all the things they want--ie to date these guys or at least a first date AND in the morning hours---rather than get miffed when things don't magically go like that or be offended at an alternative suggestion. Another way to look at it, is that she would be able to gauge if it was actually disrespect or selfishness etc if she'd stood her ground on her schedule but arranged a date at some time that worked for her.  I'm going to guess one if not both of the guys would have met up at some other date in the future that worked for her schedule.  She just needed to kick the can down the road.  A little patience.

I think the guys agreed to the morning coffee date but it wasn't set so thus the implication that it was open enough that there was no harm in asking--which is IMO how she should have treated it back.  "lol, no harm in asking, but I can't do that right now, i'm busy with my daughter in the afternoons--what morning works for you?".

I think some of us think morning coffee dates are undesirable but nothing indicates that her dates do and neither does she so they should go for that.  At least they were on the same page about the type of date it was going to be

 

Sorry (not negating everything else you said) but what's with the continuing "if she's going to be nit-picky about the timing" and similar comments? That's starting to stick out with me because it's been said so many times. The intimation seems to be that she's stuck in a time frame just to be picky or controlling or something. She needs that time because that's when she doesn't have her daughter. Not as some sort of control freak or inflexibility issue.

I doubt these men want to go out on dates with this woman plus her daughter.

"If she's going to need morning dates..." then she should say so. Luckily, she did. From the get-go.

Sorry, but this shame-shame thing is bothering me. (Picky, high-maintenance, princess, inflexible, etc.) She HAS to do it at that general time....so...she says so. Straight off. They COULD say no.

There is no debate about her actual response being wrong (the dressing-down) but then again I don't see one single person saying it was right. Or that any of us would ever yell at a guy for this.

But all the PA little comments about how she's a picky little princess or even, as one poster said, "a B" simply for needing a particular time frame to date are pretty off-base, IMO.

[poppyfields]

I just read the original post again and it said nothing about either of them "agreeing" to the mornings.  If I missed it posted somewhere else in the thread, my apologies.

When asked when free, OP did say "any day this week in the morning."

So GND, I do understand your irritation about them not remembering that or worst case, respecting that.

However, I think if your mindset about dating were different, and more positive, and I understand why it's not right now, you might not have become quite so irritated by it.

Perhaps responding with "I'd love to, but can't do afternoons, mornings work best for me right now."

And then offer an alternative day in the morning.  

I dunno, just a suggestion.  First meets should not be this difficult.

But again, I do understand your side and ideally, what Caligirl proposed they say would have been perfect! 

Might have made all the difference!

 

 

Edited July 12, 2020 by poppyfields

[CaliforniaGirl]

13 minutes ago, poppyfields said:

I just read the original post again and it said nothing about either of them "agreeing" to the mornings.  

When asked when free, OP did say "any day this week in the morning."

So GND, I do understand your irritation about them not remembering that or worst case, respecting that.

However, I think if your mindset about dating were different, and more positive, and I understand why it's not, you might not have become quite so irritated by it.

Perhaps responding with "I'd love to, but can't do afternoons, mornings work best for me right now."

And then offer an alternative day in the morning.  

I dunno, just a suggestion.  First meets should not be this difficult.

But again, I do understand your side and ideally, what Caligirl proposed they say would have been perfect! 

Might have made all the difference. 

 

 

I don't know....she already DID say "in the morning," according to her. I'm not sure I understand how she asked this incorrectly. She needed mornings. So she agreed to meet. If they could do mornings.

They *asked* her when she was free.

Then ignored her answer.

A number of us have already said "I can't" without the yelling, and with a reiteration of the time abe could do it, would have been the right response. That's aside from the issue that she was just ignored, which, yes, IS irritating. 

It happened twice in a row and got under her skin.

Edited July 12, 2020 by CaliforniaGirl

[girlnextdoor2020]

8 minutes ago, CaliforniaGirl said:

I don't know....she already DID say "in the morning," according to her. I'm not sure I understand how she asked this incorrectly. She needed mornings. So she agreed to meet. If they could do mornings.

They *asked* her when she was free.

Then ignored her answer.

 

Yes, exactly. Why ask if they then go and ignore it, right?

If planned in advance I can also do afternoons or evenings, I just need to plan the baby-sitting in advance, that's it. It seems to me that the guys were the ones being the "princess", because they ignored what I said about mornings in response to their questions, and tried for me to do what they want instead, last-minute. That is way more princess behaviour than mine. lol

If I was positive and fine, I would have said to them something like "hey don't you remember I said mornings"? and see how would they react to it, and then decide if I still want to meet them or not based on that. But yes I am drained and fed up of dating, that's why I overreacted. I definitely need a break. 

Edited July 12, 2020 by girlnextdoor2020