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Did I take too long to make a move on bumble?


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Posted (edited)

I matched with a girl on bumble and we started talking and hit it off. We spoke for a day then sparingly for the next two days. I wanted to ask her out on a date but she never got back to me after I asked her about her dog. I really wanted to try to get to know her and am really annoyed that I couldn't ask her out. This happened a little less than a week ago. Are my chances blown with this girl? And what should I do differently next time?

Edited by Gazz23
Posted

If you are still matched what do you have to lose? I know in a way it would be considered a double text since she hasn't responded to  your last one but just reach out and get right to the point about asking for a date.  I think you could even say that the last few days got away from you (like if you were back at work; IMO give a reason even it's vague otherwise she might assume dating other girls and be defensive) but that you really want to see her or meet up. And be confident, positive.  You might think it doesn't come through via black and white messages and words in a text but it definitely does. Good luck

  • Like 2
Posted

See if you can organise a phone call! Open with a tasteless joke (with your better judgment) or just ask her how she has been and if she fancied a chat on the phone. 
 

1 text -

2 phone-

3 video chat-

4 date. 

sometimes you can miss out 3. 

Don’t be one of the people that just text, cos that gets boring real fast for a lot of people. Unless she one of the few that don’t like speaking on the phone! 
let us know how you get on 

Posted (edited)

Give it a shot. If you think you waited too long, next time don't just leave open-ended and sort of boring (sorry) - i.e. texts like asking her about her dog. She's going to roll her eyes at some point and go, "I had no plans today to discuss my dog with some stranger, I was looking for some sort of interest" and sort of wander off. **

After a few texts ask her if she's ever been to (place X..."where" and what type will depend upon your area's social distance rules, I guess). She'll give you a yes or a no. You can then say "Want to go this Friday so we can pick this conversation up in person? My treat." Or...whatever.

** (edit) OTOH...if you were talking about dogs because each of you has one, how about "So hey, do you ever take Fido to Blah-blah dog park? I'm taking Snookums this Sunday, want to meet up?"

Edited by CaliforniaGirl
  • Like 3
Posted

I always thought Bumble was a role reversal dating app, where women were to do the contacting and asking out. IMO it doesn't matter who contacts who, it's about the end game.

Posted

Yeah just ask her out. She might be one of those people who hate small talk, and who want to go out on a date as soon as possible. Maybe she thought it wasn't going anywhere when you asked about her dog, so she didn't reply to that 

  • Like 2
Posted (edited)
2 hours ago, Erik30 said:

Yeah just ask her out. She might be one of those people who hate small talk, and who want to go out on a date as soon as possible. Maybe she thought it wasn't going anywhere when you asked about her dog, so she didn't reply to that 

I Always thought it was the opposite. Women like to talk to a lot and text and men prefer to cut to the chase 

Edited by Roswell91
Posted
On 6/29/2020 at 11:01 AM, Gazz23 said:

I matched with a girl on bumble and we started talking and hit it off. We spoke for a day then sparingly for the next two days. I wanted to ask her out on a date but she never got back to me after I asked her about her dog. I really wanted to try to get to know her and am really annoyed that I couldn't ask her out. This happened a little less than a week ago. Are my chances blown with this girl? And what should I do differently next time?

If youre really interested in her. Ask her out. Dont let an opportunity go by. 

  • Like 1
Posted
1 hour ago, Roswell91 said:

I Always thought it was the opposite. Women like to talk to a lot and text and men prefer to cut to the chase 

That's true but every woman is different. Some want to text a guy at least a week before they go out on a date, and for others just a couple of messages is enough. They might even ask you out, just don't say anything stupid/creepy. That's pretty much my own experience on dating apps 

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Posted
4 hours ago, smackie9 said:

I always thought Bumble was a role reversal dating app, where women were to do the contacting and asking out. IMO it doesn't matter who contacts who, it's about the end game.

Maybe it's supposed to be that way, but tbh when I used it I would choose the guys I want to chat but I'd let them ask me out. lol

 

On 6/30/2020 at 5:42 AM, CaliforniaGirl said:

Give it a shot. If you think you waited too long, next time don't just leave open-ended and sort of boring (sorry) - i.e. texts like asking her about her dog. She's going to roll her eyes at some point and go, "I had no plans today to discuss my dog with some stranger, I was looking for some sort of interest" and sort of wander off.

That definitely wasn't the problem. If she was really interested, he could've asked about anything and she would gladly reply. The problem about online dating is that you have lots of options at the same time, and imo, you OP wasn't her first option. You can try to send her another message and see how it goes, you have nothing to lose really, and well, there's always a chance that she may have missed it. 

  • Like 1
Posted
13 hours ago, smackie9 said:

I always thought Bumble was a role reversal dating app, where women were to do the contacting and asking out. IMO it doesn't matter who contacts who, it's about the end game.

Maybe that was the intention, but in reality it's not working out that way. Most women just send an emoji or "hi" and from then on it's up to the guy. 

The only difference with Bumble is that men can't send the first message, and you're automatically unmatched if a woman doesn't write you within 24 hours. Other than that it's just like any other dating app. I think Bumble is more about "protecting" women from getting unwanted messages and matches.

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