Fallen so low after ex girlfriend broke up with me, but she was bad to me throughout, why do I feel so s***.lost my job living on lowest amount of money and rebuilding my life at 33

[aamoo]

So I met a girl at work last year and we got on a lot , we started seeing each other yet she would always say I wasn’t her type but we really geled, basically she did have some spoilt traits and would flip her s*** everyone and again, she also had a bit of a cocaine issues that she would deny. She was from a wealthy family and I always accepted her wild past the age we are we found each other to Ben what we anted from life right now.looking back she did treat me bad like joke about my appearance and things about me, but i would say I’m a good looking guy but I’m not superfical but I would never take it to heart. Long story short it was always up and down with her and many times I would state if im not what you want then let’s leave it. Yet she would convince me I was ect even . We had good times and I left the country she lived in to literally go back home see family and go back join her and start a new life together. That’s where it turned sour.. she basically sent me a message one night when she was at a party drunk, saying her boss wanted to f***nher and I do my thing she does hers.. she cried and said nothing happened I believed her (well I guess I wanted to believe her to go back to this life I was so happy to have ) couple months done the line I went to join her , worst week of my life she was defo off with me. And we had one argument and she dumped me. Then I found out she was disloyal when I was away. She said at the end I was not worth it and not what she wanted. I had to come back to the UK torn apart it was horrendous. I realised after researching and piecing it together she had issues and had narcissist attributes.i feel like she won and got away with so much and I was disposable. But it all came out of nowhere (well for me it did) worst period of my life. Few months in now and I’ll jobless literally a far cry away from the life I was leading last year. I shouldn’t but I still miss her and regret things although she was in the wrong. Why is this? I’m trying to pick myself up go back to college re train and pick my life up.. but damn at 33 I feel inadequate as a man and feel like iv gone back 10 years...is there hope any similar story’s out there? 

[Maldives]

Wow sorry to hear bro and it sounds like she led you on. And that's not really fair on you. Humans are hard to read and sounds like she was deceptive. The clue for you I guess was that you weren't her type but it's hard to register that if you like someone and they lead you on like she did. Ye I been there bro many a moon ago. I just started uni this was early 90s way back in 92 to be exact. First time id fallen in love and she'd indicated she just wanted to be friends but her signals were a little mixed and that also mixed in with my inexperience didn't help . A few mths later it was over and I found it hard to focus on uni and failed everything bar two subjects. I got kicked out of uni lol but the following yr I got back in but decided to defer and work full time. Slowly 2 to 3 yrs had passed and I'd put my life back together dropping the 20 or so kilos I'd put on as well lol. Then i met my next love only to be dumped again 6 mths later . The only advice i would part with is this, the passage of time will always set things straight but do look after your health whilst going thru this and try not going thru what I went thru putting on weight and stuff it just makes the break up just that much harder ..sorry to hear about the job, what industry were you in? Worse time to happen wth this Covid 19.. mate you will just have to put your head down and bum up and start looking for work. I can relate mate just keep the focus that's what I found is key 

Edited June 22, 2020 by Goodguy05

[d0nnivain]

With the pandemic everyone is feeling uncertain now.  Some parts are curtailing the spread.  

Change is upsetting.  This break up has added to your feelings that our life is out of control. 

You know what you want to do to put your life on an upward trajectory.  You want to go back to school.  What is step one?  Do you know what you want to study?  Have you applied for student loans or figured out how to pay for it?  Can you start even one class now while the world is on pause?  Take one concrete positive step & you will feel better. 

As for your relationship, you claim it was so sudden  Based solely on what you posted, it wasn't.  It was just that you chose to ignore all the red flags.  Odds are there were more warning signs you missed.  Going forward when you see red flags in a relationship pay attention; don't ignore them. 

Hang in there.  Take some baby steps toward moving forward & upward in your life.  

[TeddyBundy1993]

For women men are disposable. Because they have many men ready to circling them on social media, work at their gym and so on. But it doesnt define you at all and this bulls*** has happened with all of us. Its cruel but that's how it goes they meet us date us and then some other shiny bad guy comes and they go over to explore and built new life with them.  

Dont feel so low about your self. Many men are lonely at 30ies. And are struggling with carrier. It's how this world goes on, hope is best for broken hearts and lonely people. 

As time passes you'll know this s*** happened for best. Many of us stay in a toxic relationship fearing to be alone, but its better to be alone than being with a draining person. You need to spend time with people who gonna give you mental strength.  Maybe with family or friends. This phase is not permanent and will pass. A new chapter of your life will start friend. Stay calm and focus and healing, a day by day survival.