How much do girls care about home ownership?

[Ellener]

Be careful what you buy in Texas, global warming and hurricane season has most places vulnerable to flooding:

Nearly every major city in Texas is vulnerable to Gulf Coast hurricanes or sits in “Flash Flood Alley,” one of the most flash flood-prone areas in the nation. More than 200,000 single-family homes in disaster-declared Texas counties were flooded by Hurricane Harvey last year, and many of them were in areas not considered high-risk for floods.

Don’t assume your area won’t flood because it hasn’t in the past: Risk of flooding can change considerably as factors like drought and urban development affect the ground’s surface. Nationwide, 26 percent of flood insurance claims come from properties outside high-risk zones.

Floods are the most common and costly natural disaster in the United States. A single inch of water in an average home can cost more than $26,000 in damage, and floods have struck all 50 states in the past five years.

Homeowners and renters insurance typically do not cover flood damage. Adding flood insurance now can mean the difference between post-disaster recovery and financial devastation.

( FEMA )

[Ruby Slippers]

It depends on the market you're in, of course, but in general, as long as you can afford to save up a good down payment and pay it off in 15 years or less, owning vs. renting is a no-brainer.

I bought my first house a year and a half ago. For a bigger and better house and plot of land, I've spent only slightly more on housing costs (mortgage, property taxes, insurance, home warranty, maintenance) than I did renting.

I think people tend to exaggerate the burden of maintenance cost. If you get a good, thorough inspection upfront, have home owner's insurance, and maintain a decent home warranty for about $650 a year, almost every essential maintenance expense will be covered. I had a pretty expensive plumbing issue last year that the home warranty covered entirely, minus a $70 service charge. 

People do all kinds of non-essential upgrades and additions to their houses, but you don't have to. I have a modest older starter home, and while I might invest in some improvements in the future, even if I never did, I feel much better knowing that I'm investing in something I own rather than throwing money in the wind every month.

The land is the real asset. As they say, they're not making any more of that. 

[Versacehottie]

Hmmm, well the austin market is pretty hot right now. I think a girl who is really into you is going to see it as a positive regardless.  You will be way ahead of the game financially in a few years which will be a bonus to future girls you might date.  

The thing you should do is if you get a single family home in the suburban areas is while you are still single make sure you make real effort to have a late 20s lifestyle, ie make a real effort to go out downtown and date etc (do less suburban things).  I don't know the area but if there are nice condos downtown/the busy, fun area that would be another way to go.  Either way, you would be ahead of the game.  I think if you are boring and sedate in life and stay at home in a suburban, family area or become house poor because of paying your mortgage those could affect your dating life.  I think the money you described as far as income and spending sound about right--as long as your income is stable and that's a big IF at the moment for lots of industries. Good luck

[Ami1uwant]

8 hours ago, GimmeeShelter said:

I’m trying to decide if I should buy a home in the Austin area. I make a little less than $140K a year (including bonus and investments), which I know isn’t great for Austin but that’s another problem. Assuming I can buy a starter home around $400K (and it’s a good investment/right area/etc), should I? I feel like girls in Texas really look down on men in their late 20s like me that don’t a home...

 

Your choice..your life.

 

do you want yo stay in Austin?  Is your position or career safe there if the place you work goes out of business or lays you off?

 

my rule on home ownership.price of house should not be more than 3 times your salary.  In my dating life when I here women bought a house says I want to stay here so you need to come to me.

 

how has your relationships been?

 

 

Edited June 20, 2020 by Ami1uwant

[Gaeta]

1 hour ago, Ruby Slippers said:

I bought my first house a year and a half ago. 

I think people tend to exaggerate the burden of maintenance cost.

Maybe you feel that way because you're a new owner and no tile fell on your head yet.  I have own 3 properties so far. In the past 10 years I had to disburse for a new roof, asphalt, recolking the outside, new fireplace chimney, and a bunch of other less important repair and maintenance. This week I had 3 quotes done on new windows and patio doors. It never ends. And I am not talking about the new bathroom and kitchen, and floors I renovated when I first purchased. 

[Ami1uwant]

2 hours ago, Ellener said:

Be careful what you buy in Texas, global warming and hurricane season has most places vulnerable to flooding:

Nearly every major city in Texas is vulnerable to Gulf Coast hurricanes or sits in “Flash Flood Alley,” one of the most flash flood-prone areas in the nation. More than 200,000 single-family homes in disaster-declared Texas counties were flooded by Hurricane Harvey last year, and many of them were in areas not considered high-risk for floods.

Don’t assume your area won’t flood because it hasn’t in the past: Risk of flooding can change considerably as factors like drought and urban development affect the ground’s surface. Nationwide, 26 percent of flood insurance claims come from properties outside high-risk zones.

Floods are the most common and costly natural disaster in the United States. A single inch of water in an average home can cost more than $26,000 in damage, and floods have struck all 50 states in the past five years.

Homeowners and renters insurance typically do not cover flood damage. Adding flood insurance now can mean the difference between post-disaster recovery and financial devastation.

( FEMA )

The problem in the fema model was they didn’t factor in more concrete and development that came.  Another issue in Houston some flooding was cause by dam release.

[contel3]

7 hours ago, Gaeta said:

Maybe you feel that way because you're a new owner and no tile fell on your head yet.  I have own 3 properties so far. In the past 10 years I had to disburse for a new roof, asphalt, recolking the outside, new fireplace chimney, and a bunch of other less important repair and maintenance. This week I had 3 quotes done on new windows and patio doors. It never ends. And I am not talking about the new bathroom and kitchen, and floors I renovated when I first purchased. 

The work is never ending. It's like once you're done with one thing another breaks. I just spent a whole week on repairs. Unless it was inherited and had sentimental value I would not want to own property.

I would prefer a guy who wasn't tied down to be honest. I wouldn't want to be tied to a specific city and if me and my partner actually decided to buy a home (which I doubt, since I see it as a waste of resources) I would prefer having a say. But then I'm young and my dream is to explore the world. More family minded women might see it differently.

If it's your dream to own a house go for it! I wouldn't do it to have better chances in dating though. 

Edited June 20, 2020 by contel3

[Ellener]

8 hours ago, Ami1uwant said:

The problem in the fema model was they didn’t factor in more concrete and development that came.  Another issue in Houston some flooding was cause by dam release.

Texas always flooded even pre-development. One of the former largest ports in the country, Indianola, no one has heard of it now because repeated storms wiped it out. It's a wildlife sanctuary now.

1 hour ago, contel3 said:

f it's your dream to own a house go for it! I wouldn't do it to have better chances in dating though. 

Exactly.

[Azincourt]

19 hours ago, GimmeeShelter said:

I’m trying to decide if I should buy a home in the Austin area. I make a little less than $140K a year (including bonus and investments), which I know isn’t great for Austin but that’s another problem. Assuming I can buy a starter home around $400K (and it’s a good investment/right area/etc), should I? I feel like girls in Texas really look down on men in their late 20s like me that don’t a home...

Depends on what you're looking for and the age group the women you are seeking to date are part of.

Most of the women I date are in their early 20s.

They either live with roomates or they still live at home because their colleges is like an hour away from their parents home.  I'm in my 30s and I live with a bunch of guys I met back in college. Most women in that age group have no issues with me living with roomates at my age. Whereas most of the women I've met in their 30s aren't thrilled about this arrangement of mine.

Because they're either divorced,  or they're single and they are looking for a serious relationship with the intent of having kids, either long-term co-habitation or marriage, and you need a house of your own for that to happen.

$400k for a house?

Houses around here are 150,000 euros, 5 big, spacious rooms, living-room, 2 bathrooms, great neighborhood, an hour away from the beach, less than 30 minutes from a big public Hospital etc, and I still ain't interested in getting a mortgage and to be tied down for it for 30+ years. 

Hit the gym hard and women won't look down on you, at least many women don't. Those who do are the women you don't want to date in any case.

Edited June 20, 2020 by Azincourt

[Versacehottie]

Good arguments for pros and cons of it.  I also think to add to what I said (which is generally pro), is if you think of the house to be a carrot because it will SPECIFICALLY will draw women to you, I think it's the wrong thing to do.

I don't know that many women are specifically motivated by that.  They'd have to be attracted to you first (physically) and like your personality.  It would probably only factor in if a woman was thinking seriously about you, which is down the line time wise and pertains to a small group of women.  In other words, if you take the whole pie of women, only a smaller slice will be interested in you, and you in return; then factor in that fledgling relationships often don't go far or fail to get off the ground, so that's a smaller slice of people; then factor in that it will probably only really matter once you are a few months in where at least on her end she has decided she wants a serious relationship with you.---that's the point she will probably see it as a really bonus but it won't likely be the reason she decides to date you.  Ruby Slippers is right that it does convey a guy who wants a responsible, stable life and that is attractive but a person might not be considering that until you are a serious couple..  And contel3 is ALSO right if you are too tied to the house and house type duties and pursuits, it can be less attractive to women (that can happen right from the beginning depending on how you manage it, both the real duties and what you say about it to her).

ALSO, it depends what age of women you are interested in pursuing in general.  As a generalization, younger women than you are probably going to see very little draw because of house ownership--in fact it could be a deterrent specifically.  Same age is going to see it as a mixed bag depending on the girl and your devotion to said house and where you each are in your life and how homebody each of you are.  Slightly older will probably see it as a bonus because of where they are in their life.  

Edited June 20, 2020 by Versacehottie

[BaileyB]

Whether you decide to rent or buy a home, do so because It’s in your best interest. 

When I moved out of my parent’s home, I bought my own condo. It was the single best decision I have ever made - I sold it several years later for three times what I paid for it. I was then able to take that money and combine it with the money my partner had invested in his home, and together we are building a beautiful home. 

Rather than home ownership per se, I would say that women are generally looking for a dependable and responsible man. At a certain stage of life, when they are looking for a serious relationship or a life partner, they will often seek a man who is hard working, financially responsible, and stable. Whether you own a home or not likely does not matter as much as these other factors - although, home ownership is often associated with all of those things...

[Ami1uwant]

On home ownership...

 

personally i I wouldn’t do it...here is why..

 

1 with high unemployment now snd folks losing jobs more houses on market and prices drop.

 

2 Covid can change things big time where people don’t have to go to tech areas to work like Austin or Seattle and instead coukd work elsewhere where housing  in cheaper relative to salary.

 

3 what will happen to your career long term.  You want to take a housing lsd?

[carhill]

IME, demographic-driven, in demographics where status and assets rule the security dynamic, a man's domicile defines part of who he is, ostensibly a significant part in some socio-economic subsets. Further, value is perceived in number and location, more isn't always better unless location matches up. Going to the ski cabin over Christmas and to the beach house in summer, etc, etc. Location can matter on those things. Men who don't match up in that way aren't ridiculed or denigrated, they're simply invisible. Not on the hot/egocentric matrix some women use to determine potential dating partners and mates.

Is all that changing in the younger generations? IDK, I've seen some with grandchildren of friends, in that both the girl and guy work and they're fine with renting a place together and living life large instead of saving for what can be a sizable downpayment for a house. I can see some wisdom in that because decades ago, while working diligently and living small to do that kind of saving it really impacted my social life, giving the appearance of relative poverty when in reality the work product was going into savings. That combined with not having a quantifiable job, the reality of self-employment, that a woman could easily gauge salary potential of, really hit the partner matrix opportunities hard. Looking back though, I was lousy at smooth talk and schmoozing and all that social lubrication stuff so young ladies probably avoided me on that factor alone, perceiving it as lack of confidence. Assets are nice, a home is nice but effective selling of oneself is also important. Actions and assets aren't enough. I see that today with some of the grandchildren males, they've got bill collectors chasing them, behind on the rent, drinking like fish and still the girls love them because well they're attractive and smooth talkers; no home can compete with that on its own. Girls like what they like, then reality hits and they either live with it or go like something else. And then we die

[Haydn]

Make sure the sheets are clean and the house is nicely aired. (Keep a slight but movable breeze at all times) Always keep Poo Pourri handy, scatter liberally throughout the house. I suggest `Royal Flush` 

Girl bait. Quids in and no worries.

But.....

[manfrombelow]

On 6/20/2020 at 12:58 AM, Gaeta said:

I think women want to find a life partner to purchase a house together, not get a man with a  house.

You are wrong.

Due to biological programming, women will always prefer a guy who can fulfil the role of a "provider" - which includes (but not limit to) "home ownership".

[d0nnivain]

manfrombelow 

Even women who are looking for providers don't necessarily want that young man to already own a house.  The woman wants to pick it out together & decorate, make it her nest.  She doesn't want to move into his house.  

Again, financial stability is a plus but there are other ways to manifest that then homeownership which can be a costly time consuming burden.  

In my 20s I was more persuaded by nicely decorated apartment (real furniture) with 1 roommate per bedroom, a step up from college where you just crammed as many people as possible in and a decent car.  I would have thought some mid-20s guy who owned his own house was dull & would rather mow the lawn then go to the beach.  

[Calmandfocused]

I’ve no idea what the market is like for the rest of the world but in the U.K. it usually is dependant on your age. Most young adults rent until they are financially secure. Then they buy. This makes a lot of sense as rents can be higher than mortgages. Plus U.K. pensions do not cover the cost of renting generally. So you’d be daft not to buy If you can IMO. 
 

Rents in London are eye watering and how people afford it I do not know. 

Would I be put off by a man who doesn’t own his own home? It depends on the circumstances but I would expect a man in my age range to have his own home and finances together, like I do. Sometimes, (but as I said it depends on the circumstances) choosing to rent rather than buy can be indicative of financial problems. 
 

I go by the rule that I do not expect a man to financially provide for me.  However what I do expect is that a man can financially provide for himself. 
 

However, context is very important when considering this. 

Edited June 20, 2020 by Calmandfocused

[Bluesky00]

Hold on, so renting is cheaper than buying?!I geez. If that’s the case, why do people say it’s better to own a house because rent last forever and a mortgage doesn’t? And a $1000 apartment rent is a waste and is better to pay a mortgage? And on here, I hear it’s better to rent now?! People have told me buy buy buy a house! I rent so people seem to look down on me for it. But heck, I don’t have the money for a house! 

 If I had the money or won the lottery I would buy a house no doubt about it. Privacy, can do whatever I want, property is mine.

And I find it attractive when a guy in his 20’s says he owns a house personally. It tells me they are financially secure, good at yard work, mowing the lawn, etc, etc. And actually do house hold chores. Then again, it depends where he lives, if he lives in the suburbs, a house is fine. In a big city,a condo is fine as well.

Edited June 20, 2020 by Bluesky00

[Ami1uwant]

2 hours ago, Calmandfocused said:

I’ve no idea what the market is like for the rest of the world but in the U.K. it usually is dependant on your age. Most young adults rent until they are financially secure. Then they buy. This makes a lot of sense as rents can be higher than mortgages. Plus U.K. pensions do not cover the cost of renting generally. So you’d be daft not to buy If you can IMO. 
 

Rents in London are eye watering and how people afford it I do not know. 

Would I be put off by a man who doesn’t own his own home? It depends on the circumstances but I would expect a man in my age range to have his own home and finances together, like I do. Sometimes, (but as I said it depends on the circumstances) choosing to rent rather than buy can be indicative of financial problems. 
 

I go by the rule that I do not expect a man to financially provide for me.  However what I do expect is that a man can financially provide for himself. 
 

However, context is very important when considering this. 

 

Dont know where you live. I currently live in the Washington DC area. My salary is in the low $100s. I am single. You need st least $500K to buy a townhouse.  I can’t afford that.  If I was married to someone and combined income is $200Zk we could afford that.

 

if I was living in where I grew up and I made $100K I coukd afford many homes since median is around $150K.

[manfrombelow]

7 hours ago, d0nnivain said:

manfrombelow 

Even women who are looking for providers don't necessarily want that young man to already own a house.  The woman wants to pick it out together & decorate, make it her nest.  She doesn't want to move into his house.  

But they still PREFER such guys.

And I don't care what women want to do with my house. 

Edited June 21, 2020 by manfrombelow

[Caauug]

On 6/20/2020 at 1:46 AM, GimmeeShelter said:

I’m trying to decide if I should buy a home in the Austin area. I make a little less than $140K a year (including bonus and investments), which I know isn’t great for Austin but that’s another problem. Assuming I can buy a starter home around $400K (and it’s a good investment/right area/etc), should I? I feel like girls in Texas really look down on men in their late 20s like me that don’t a home...

You have problems attracting girls so you are looking at "Gold Diggers"?   Or Single mums with a ready made family just looking for a nest? It appears you are doing this for the wrong reasons, do it to better yourself and increase your own financial value for YOU.

On 6/20/2020 at 2:33 AM, Gaeta said:

Pull women with what? The property is his. Even if he marries the fact he purchased it to his name before the legal union it remains his. How many women are interested in living in 'their boyfriends'  home and pay utilities? nah. 

She would only have to prove she put money into the property, have a couple of kids (maybe not even his but he has connected with them) and spent the last year or so living common law in the property...… She would have the lot, with him still paying the mortgage, rent for his new single bed apartment and child support all out of his $140K+yr. Paying an escort for a few times a month will be cheaper than buying a house "To pull women"......

On 6/20/2020 at 6:45 AM, Hopeful30 said:

If you're paying monthly living anyways, why not pay it towards a mortgage so that you get it back in the end? (When you sell) 

^^^^^ Yes, this has always worked for me. But I have never sold...… With 5 properties maybe I should shed a few....

On 6/20/2020 at 7:33 AM, Weezy1973 said:

When you add in maintenance, interest, property tax and insurance, renting is almost always cheaper. Of course if you have a big down payment that changes things, but in average for sure renting is cheaper. Add in the flexibility of being able to move whenever you need to, renting is often the better option as long as you’re putting the difference into investments. 

This is something OP will have to consider for his area and his spending habits. Renting in my area is likely closer to 2x expensive than to buy, it has been this way since the last mining boom. Some people do not do investments, property or other.

On 6/20/2020 at 7:57 AM, Ellener said:

Be careful what you buy in Texas, global warming and hurricane season has most places vulnerable to flooding:

Nearly every major city in Texas is vulnerable to Gulf Coast hurricanes or sits in “Flash Flood Alley,” one of the most flash flood-prone areas in the nation. More than 200,000 single-family homes in disaster-declared Texas counties were flooded by Hurricane Harvey last year, and many of them were in areas not considered high-risk for floods.

Don’t assume your area won’t flood because it hasn’t in the past: Risk of flooding can change considerably as factors like drought and urban development affect the ground’s surface. Nationwide, 26 percent of flood insurance claims come from properties outside high-risk zones.

Floods are the most common and costly natural disaster in the United States. A single inch of water in an average home can cost more than $26,000 in damage, and floods have struck all 50 states in the past five years.

Homeowners and renters insurance typically do not cover flood damage. Adding flood insurance now can mean the difference between post-disaster recovery and financial devastation.

( FEMA )

This is likely #1 reason not to buy or the old "Location, location, location" 3x reason to buy a property in real estate if not in above zones.

 

[d0nnivain]

7 hours ago, manfrombelow said:

But they still PREFER such guys.

And I don't care what women want to do with my house. 

Exactly.   It's your house, not her house.  As a woman I wanted a house I shared in all aspects with my husband.  The yours vs mine mindset is destructive in a marriage.  (notice I didn't say relationship.  A BF/GF has no rights to somebody else's assets.   

[Gaeta]

9 hours ago, manfrombelow said:

But they still PREFER such guys.

And I don't care what women want to do with my house. 

I read lots of bitterness between those lines. 

We've had plenty of women here moving in with their boyfriend and not feeling at home, not feeling they were working together toward a common goal, they feel out of place and they feel a big lack of commitment from their boyfriend as they live in *his* house and can be told anytime to beat it. 

Also, we've had a share of posters moving in their partner's house, a house he previously own with an ex, where he raised his children, that brings on another type of problem for the new woman moving in. She doesn't like the furniture, doesn't like the wallpaper, etc etc as it was done to the taste of the ex.

 

[Azincourt]

22 hours ago, carhill said:

IME, demographic-driven, in demographics where status and assets rule the security dynamic, a man's domicile defines part of who he is, ostensibly a significant part in some socio-economic subsets. Further, value is perceived in number and location, more isn't always better unless location matches up. Going to the ski cabin over Christmas and to the beach house in summer, etc, etc. Location can matter on those things. Men who don't match up in that way aren't ridiculed or denigrated, they're simply invisible. Not on the hot/egocentric matrix some women use to determine potential dating partners and mates.

Is all that changing in the younger generations? IDK, I've seen some with grandchildren of friends, in that both the girl and guy work and they're fine with renting a place together and living life large instead of saving for what can be a sizable downpayment for a house. I can see some wisdom in that because decades ago, while working diligently and living small to do that kind of saving it really impacted my social life, giving the appearance of relative poverty when in reality the work product was going into savings. That combined with not having a quantifiable job, the reality of self-employment, that a woman could easily gauge salary potential of, really hit the partner matrix opportunities hard. Looking back though, I was lousy at smooth talk and schmoozing and all that social lubrication stuff so young ladies probably avoided me on that factor alone, perceiving it as lack of confidence. Assets are nice, a home is nice but effective selling of oneself is also important. Actions and assets aren't enough. I see that today with some of the grandchildren males, they've got bill collectors chasing them, behind on the rent, drinking like fish and still the girls love them because well they're attractive and smooth talkers; no home can compete with that on its own. Girls like what they like, then reality hits and they either live with it or go like something else. And then we die

That depends on location and social expectations.

Would Greek, Italian, Portuguese, Ukranian, Brazilian, Angolan women etc etc love to have a young man with good economical prospects, a few hundreds of thousands of euros in the bank, a good job, while also owning a house and having the mortgage on the house being well on it's way of being paid off.

Sure, and I'd love to sleep with Selena Gomez. It ain't happening.

Women aren't waiting around for men with money to come sweep them off their feet. They date men who are broke, have no job, or live at home. Dudes with run-down cars that are older than themselves,  and dudes with no car at all. I'm talking about hot women here. The average women probably have to lower their standards even more if they want to have a boyfriend at all, and since most women aren't going to become lesbians due to a lack of eligible males - they date what they can get.

All these women expect of a man is for him to take care of himself, and that's as easy as shooting fish inside a barrel. 

Hit the gym hard, and you'll do great.

There's a dude next door who's been dating the same(quite attractive) woman for the last 10 years, he's 29, lives with his parents, and has no money to his name. I'd be surprised if he owns more than one toothbrush, and yet she's still very into him. He's not even that attractive. 6 feet tall, 160lbs, 12% body fat, pretty much the standard male.

Attractive women aren't picky about the men they date or get married to. I have no idea why guys make everything so complicated.  ''HUH HUH either gotta be a multi-millionaire before the age of 25 before I can even get a date with a woman I'm not even attracted to,  or I need to be more physically attractive than all of the male Hollywood super stars put together since 1920 to 2020 for a woman to even smile at me, and then I'll probably have to buy her dinner at the ritz.''

Chill, women have a sex drive and they have feelings too.

 

 

Accountant/lawyer, eh?

 

Edited June 21, 2020 by Azincourt

[Azincourt]

oh, and I was born and raised in California, lived there until the age of 18, and met plenty of Santa Monica Beach women who didn't care about a man's financial  prospects and house-owning situation, meeting many women who were older and dating dudes who lived still with roomates at the age of 30, 40, 50. Millions of(attractive) women care about the MAN, not about the money he has and what he can give her $$$ €€€ £££ just put yourself out there, and you'll meet them.