Author Jackx Posted June 18, 2020 Author Posted June 18, 2020 Yeah I know. It would have only been a short term thing so we could have saved money for a house. I have a few friends who live with their GF’s at their parents. It depends on the circumstances. To be honest she doesn’t have her life together yet. Yeah she has her own place & is independent but she works in a factory, I told her she is too smart to be working there & needs more ambition. She told me she would like to start a dog grooming course, then get her own business. So I pushed her to do it, found colleges for her and I would keep on telling her go for it, at least twice a month. But she would just say shut up or couldn’t be arsed. I know she wants to. Just lazy. Thats how I get treated when I just want the best for her and she says I don’t care, right? what can I do. This breakup has given me motivation to make myself a better person, however I cannot speak for her. I’m done with relationships for a while. We could be together in the future, who knows. It does happen. Even after years but a lot has to change. However I will move on & enjoy my single life for a while. She is out of my life & social media. I just hope she is out of my mind soon for my own sake. I have a hard time letting go of things. But thank-you all for your advice
Maldives Posted June 21, 2020 Posted June 21, 2020 I would say what's the rush it's ok to take your time you did the right thing with what you knew was right for you at the time. She sounds and most woman are like that wanting some form of commitment. I was always thought that in itself really isnt love and no your not stringing her along stop being so hard on yourself bro your just at two different speeds. I honestly never been able to figure out why this commitment thing wth woman is so important security maybe? You didn't do anything wrong and mate you are going to find this wth a lot of woman just check out the online dating profiles 99 percent have something along the lines of 'wanting a serious relationship' ' ...ahh who knows what tommorrow brings they change there feelings like the weather even wen U r commited chew on that for a while ...U did the right thing for U dude with what you knew at the time don't be so hard on yourself because you didn't commit there all like that 1
elaine567 Posted June 21, 2020 Posted June 21, 2020 On 6/18/2020 at 6:09 PM, Jackx said: She told me she would like to start a dog grooming course, then get her own business. So I pushed her to do it, found colleges for her and I would keep on telling her go for it, at least twice a month. But she would just say shut up or couldn’t be arsed. I know she wants to. Just lazy. Or no money... I guess she is not working in a factory because she wants to, she is doing it because she HAS to. When a person is "done", they have usually stored up enough bad memories to last them a lifetime. Upset, disappointment, frustration, resentment... etc all lead to chronic unhappiness and they then decide to leave. Working out and "transforming" yourself will not cancel all that out and that is the usually the problem with second chances, all the hurt and pain and perceived problems just resurface and either it is a firm "NO" to reconciliation or there is an attempt to reconcile that ultimately will often fail. You can't erase history. As for commitment, most women a some point want commitment, but she usually wants that decision to come from the man, it has to be his idea. She does not want to keep bringing it up, or hinting or eventually nagging as that does not feel good at all. Few want to "force" a man to do something he doesn't want to do, that isn't romantic and that will not lead to happy ever after either. Women eventually get fed up of failure to progress and inaction and thus will leave. 1
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