Dating a guy who is homeless

[Miss Spider]

On the dating app, poppy, it has a place for sign but these aren't guys from apps.2 are guys I've already knew for awhile with so its how I know haha..and then the other is a another mutual friend guy who randomly messaged me on Facebook...

[simpycurious]

45 minutes ago, Cookiesandough said:

Simpy , I wouldn’t skip on a guy cuz of his sign . I don’t really believe in astrology to be honest...

 

But just based on what I’ve read Scorpio and I wouldn’t match ... and we didn’t... but that has more to do with the fact he was just kind of boring...

 

Guess who has 3 dates  lined up this week? Yes!!!! Me:D One is a sag. One is a Leo. And the last one I’m not sure. I hope it’s a taurean because the description of taurean makes them seem dope. 
 

Lol. 

I hope the dates go well........ the genesis of my question was whether or not most really put a lot of emphasis on the signs as it applies to dating

I agree with Pop that it's not a question that would normally JUST COME up when you first meet or interact with someone but rather something you

discover in time.........CD, you never said what the GEM sign explained to you in the post above...... 

1 hour ago, Dexterr said:

So an alcoholic who can't pull his weight is considered "high standard"? 

not to me

[Malin889]

On 6/6/2020 at 12:25 PM, Cookiesandough said:

 Right now I'm getting ready for another date..  This guy is a lawyer transplanted from Cali I met on a dating app. I'm kind of worried about this one.  First, there was  0 connection in our texting. He asked me out really fast. He was kind of direct like "let's do this time. this place" and I like that take-charge attitude, but unfortunately, I have not built any rapport with him on text so I really don't what I'm in for. It's a shot in the dark and basically going on physical attraction (and although he is conventionally handsome, he's not really my type) Another thing I am not too fond of is that he did not text me yesterday to confirm. So when I woke up this morning at 9 I texted him  "You still trying to meet today?" I was honestly hoping not to hear back but he said "yes. x at x"

 O.o

Oh boy ...I have this ubiquitous 'why go when I can have more fun at home' feeling in the back of my mind, but I'm going to push through instead of be a dirtbag and cancel on him after I asked if we were still on

I’ve been there where I don’t want to go on a date, it’s happened a couple times with online guys... but honestly, you need to forget about the homeless guy and move on, and I think this is a great opportunity. I LOVE that this guy asked you out right away— you don’t need to get rapport over texting. So many folks from online dating text for days, weeks, and never ask someone out. I think it’s great that he did it right away. Shows confidence. Go for it! Good luck. 

[Weezy1973]

When I was doing online dating, I changed from messaging back and forth for awhile to build rapport but as I learned, I changed to asking out women as soon as it seemed appropriate. You don’t know anything until you meet in person anyways, and even then you don’t know much. 
 

People are looking for instant chemistry or a near sure thing sometimes which is a mistake. Date more people. At the end of the day it’s a numbers game.

[Fox Sake]

5 hours ago, Dexterr said:

So an alcoholic who can't pull his weight is considered "high standard"? 

Fair point , but...Not at all, the opposite actually.  Which is what led me to believe she was feeling lonely by the fact she lowered her standards and started serial dating. 

If you’re talking about Cookies choice of date on that occasion,  then I don’t see how that’s relevant now.  

 

I was referring to myself and my own school of thought , it maybe like Cookies schools of thought , it maybe similar, or it may be totally different. 

She already said it wasn’t her normal type, and secondly it never went anywhere and Cookies realised she has HIGHER standards and can do better. I hope! 

Edited June 9, 2020 by Fox Sake
Formatting and sensibility

[simpycurious]

I suppose that some questions are simply not meant to be answered.  Too many red flags just makes it really difficult to overcome in the long run so what's the point really.

[miranda561]

23 hours ago, poppyfields said:

How do folks know someone's sign before even meeting?  Is this question asked on the app or dating site?

I've never seen it nor would I ever ask someone, especially before a first meet.  Or ever! Lol

Same with age. Everyone seems to know each other's age before meeting!  

The site I was on asked for a range of the person you are looking for, not your own age.

I'm baffled by this. Where I am from it is considered improper to ask someone's age especially before a first meet or date. 

Yet it appears everyone knows this!

Same with sign.  I didn't discover.what my bf's sign was until about a month in when I asked when his bday was (to buy a card and small gift) and on my own I figured it out. 

To me, and most in my neck of the woods, both age and sign are totally irrelevant.

Erm what?

Forget sign but you need to know a persons age..

Im not going to turn up to something  and the guys basically my dads age. 

[poppyfields]

35 minutes ago, miranda561 said:

Erm what?

Forget sign but you need to know a persons age..

Im not going to turn up to something  and the guys basically my dads age. 

Don't they have pics on the app?  Or can you not get a sense of his age by chatting with him a bit? 

I always could in the short time I did OLD.

And lest you say that pics can be deceiving, so can he also lie about his age.

But most of the men I dated I met in real life anyway, so there was no need to ask age.  It didn't matter as long as I found him attractive and he looked to be around my age, maybe a few years younger or older, didn't matter to me.

I've dated a lot and not once did a man ever ask my age right off the bat, it came out later once we started dating.

Nor did I ever have a need to ask him.  It's considered bad form in my neck of the woods. 

 

Edited June 10, 2020 by poppyfields

[miranda561]

1 hour ago, poppyfields said:

Don't they have pics on the app?  Or can you not get a sense of his age by chatting with him a bit? 

I always could in the short time I did OLD.

And lest you say that pics can be deceiving, so can he also lie about his age.

But most of the men I dated I met in real life anyway, so there was no need to ask age.  It didn't matter as long as I found him attractive and he looked to be around my age, maybe a few years younger or older, didn't matter to me.

I've dated a lot and not once did a man ever ask my age right off the bat, it came out later once we started dating.

Nor did I ever have a need to ask him.  It's considered bad form in my neck of the woods. 

 

Thats all new to me.

I think maybe when they're under age 40 (40sPushing it a bit maybe under 35)..its fine to clarify  age.

I thought with a lot of apps its a given anyway..when youre filling out your profile.

There was a guy i met about 2/3 years ago...he was like four years older than me. But he claimed to be only like a year older than me. I found out from his friend he lied about his age. I think he thought  i would reject him had i known .

So there are pictures but as you can see evidently people lie. 

The truth is though  i think men judge women more on their age than the other way around. You know with the culture of women hit the wall at 30. 

Edited June 10, 2020 by miranda561

[poppyfields]

9 minutes ago, miranda561 said:

Thats all new to me.

I think maybe when they're under age 40 (40sPushing it a bit maybe under 35)..its fine to clarify  age.

I thought with a lot of apps its a given anyway..when youre filling out your profile.

There was a guy i met about 2/3 years ago...he was like four years older than me. But he claimed to be only like a year older than me. I found out from his friend he lied about his age. I think he thought  i would reject him had i known .

So there are pictures but as you can see evidently people lie. 

The truth is though  i think men judge women more on their age than the other way around. You know with the culture of women hit the wall at 30. 

Fair enough but I never did, 20s or now 30s. But like I said, most men I met IRL not dating apps. 

[Miss Spider]

Gonna go camping tonight with guy I've been talking to forever. He's admittedwas in love w me before. We're gonna trip together and look at the stars. This could go bad or good depending.

Edited June 10, 2020 by Cookiesandough

[stillafool]

3 hours ago, Cookiesandough said:

Gonna go camping tonight with guy I've been talking to forever. He's admittedwas in love w me before. We're gonna trip together and look at the stars. This could go bad or good depending.

That sounds like so much fun.  Don't forget to bring wine.

[stillafool]

On 6/6/2020 at 7:35 PM, Cookiesandough said:

So I had my date. Not a match. Our conversation had a lot more depth than I thought it would. But I should have known. He just wasn’t my type.  He asked me if I would like to do it again. I said yes. And then as we were leaving I said the cliche” let’s do this again sometime” Anyway. He asked me out again for tomorrow. Just nope for me. Not a match. 

 

Also he’s a Scorpio and I like taureans. Sry I just do... 

 

I’m so defeated rn 

What are you again Cookie?

[Fresh_Start]

2 hours ago, miranda561 said:

 gaslighting

Every time I see or hear this term I think of summertime cookouts.

 

Let's try not to be overly judgmental of the homeless, folks.  Sometimes all it takes is a string of very unfortunate events to leave someone destitute. 

I was once a very successful business owner living a life of glitz and glamor with a flashy sports car, expensive suits and watches, and even a pair of $1000 Italian leather shoes.  Long story short: I had a string of very unfortunate events occur, including the rapid deterioration of a medical condition that I've been living with since I was 16 that eventually lead to me having to close my company, being broke, and even pursue getting on disability.  I had no idea how long it was going to take to receive a favorable ruling with the Social Security Administration.  My attorneys told me 1-2 years, tops.  It took almost 5 years and in that time I was reduced to "homelessness".  Not in the literal sense of being out on the streets, but living with my mother and no longer having a place of my own or a car.  It was demoralizing, it was embarrassing, it was humiliating, and it was emasculating.  My mother is no peach, either, and there were times I contemplated living on the streets in lieu of having to subject myself to any more of her torment when my situation was already bad enough.

Once I was awarded disability (which is more of a safety net for me so that I don't have to be a financial burden on anyone in the event that my condition deteriorates or I'm ever in a situation where I have to take a significantly reduced workload), I got back on my feet again, have spent the past two years working with individuals with intellectual disabilities and autism, and am currently in the process of opening a business providing services to the aforementioned group of individuals.  So you just never know where that homeless guy you drive past or walk away from on the streets has been or what his story is -- and he just might be the next owner or CEO of a major corporation. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=56fngopihOo

Edited June 10, 2020 by Fresh_Start
format

[poppyfields]

Hey guys, I've gotten to know miranda, she's good peeps!  

She's got a Scorpio moon so can't be messed with lol, but she's got a huge heart.  

Everyone, be nice! 

Edited June 10, 2020 by poppyfields

[anadybella]

10 hours ago, stillafool said:

That sounds like so much fun.  Don't forget to bring wine.

You're also so funny guys.

[Miss Spider]

So I had a weird date with a guy I’ve known since early January. I feel very divided/confused. 

Basically, he lives in a little apartment in the city, but our date was at his parents house out in the country. They have 10 acres so out plan was to camp out  out there and do shrooms.

We did neither.. Last two days I spent with his family. His mom and dad are really cool. All four of us just doing  whiskey  shots,  smoking weed, eating; just chilling. 

It started raining so we didn’t camp that long, but also he said “I don’t think I wanna trip tonight because i don’t want to get weird on you and I think i will because I’m already riding a high and super happy.” I’m like... ??? That’s the best time to trip. So we  only ended up doing like 2g each (which is nothing) and falling asleep. But I was kind of disappointed he pussed out on the trip... it would have been fun. He said he went hard on the weekend with partying so I didn’t want to push it, but for me, getting weird is what trips are about.

It’s whatever, but now *I* feel weird. Don’t get me wrong, I like him, I think I have some feelings for him even which is not typical for me. Some things that put me on guard is that we call each other terms of endearment and favorite people: he wants me to come over whenever/ give me a drawer at his apartment,  he talked me into staying  a second night, and finally I feel bonded with his parents (and also his sister who came over). We talked about some heavy stuff. 
 

Just before he went to sleep he said he hasn’t been this happy in a long time and missed me. It makes me sad because I do like him, but I think this whole two days reminded me how much I love being single again. I actually have a date tonight with another dude I’m kind of excited for too.

 

I do have the feels for him, I like him A LOT. But I do not want a serious thing with him and I don’t want to say that because 1) never ends well 2)may not be on his mind. But I also don’t want to hurt him. We have not have any “talk” since a few months ago when I told him I want to take it slower and as far as I’m concerned we’re both free to see others. I just feel bad leaving now and it’s what I hate about serious relationship  stuff. I hope this isn’t going  to be another case of can’t be with you but really hard to let go. 

 

 

And we didn’t even get to trip together which would have been a lot of fun...Idk this didn’t go how I wanted it to go:...thanks anyone who read... 

Tldr; date went ok, but stuff feels complicated/ I’m just trying to kick it with what’s left of my summer until school starts. We didn’t get to trip because he said he might get weird on me. Have another date tonight with another guy. Will see how that goes. Thanks 

Edited June 12, 2020 by Cookiesandough

[Fox Sake]

11 hours ago, Cookiesandough said:

So I had a weird date with a guy I’ve known since early January. I feel very divided/confused. 

Basically, he lives in a little apartment in the city, but our date was at his parents house out in the country. They have 10 acres so out plan was to camp out  out there and do shrooms.

We did neither.. Last two days I spent with his family. His mom and dad are really cool. All four of us just doing  whiskey  shots,  smoking weed, eating; just chilling. 

It started raining so we didn’t camp that long, but also he said “I don’t think I wanna trip tonight because i don’t want to get weird on you and I think i will because I’m already riding a high and super happy.” I’m like... ??? That’s the best time to trip. So we  only ended up doing like 2g each (which is nothing) and falling asleep. But I was kind of disappointed he pussed out on the trip... it would have been fun. He said he went hard on the weekend with partying so I didn’t want to push it, but for me, getting weird is what trips are about.

It’s whatever, but now *I* feel weird. Don’t get me wrong, I like him, I think I have some feelings for him even which is not typical for me. Some things that put me on guard is that we call each other terms of endearment and favorite people: he wants me to come over whenever/ give me a drawer at his apartment,  he talked me into staying  a second night, and finally I feel bonded with his parents (and also his sister who came over). We talked about some heavy stuff. 
 

Just before he went to sleep he said he hasn’t been this happy in a long time and missed me. It makes me sad because I do like him, but I think this whole two days reminded me how much I love being single again. I actually have a date tonight with another dude I’m kind of excited for too.

 

I do have the feels for him, I like him A LOT. But I do not want a serious thing with him and I don’t want to say that because 1) never ends well 2)may not be on his mind. But I also don’t want to hurt him. We have not have any “talk” since a few months ago when I told him I want to take it slower and as far as I’m concerned we’re both free to see others. I just feel bad leaving now and it’s what I hate about serious relationship  stuff. I hope this isn’t going  to be another case of can’t be with you but really hard to let go. 

 

 

And we didn’t even get to trip together which would have been a lot of fun...Idk this didn’t go how I wanted it to go:...thanks anyone who read... 

Tldr; date went ok, but stuff feels complicated/ I’m just trying to kick it with what’s left of my summer until school starts. We didn’t get to trip because he said he might get weird on me. Have another date tonight with another guy. Will see how that goes. Thanks 

I’m glad you’re still alive! Haha 

your plans sounded epic and whether you got to trip or not you still had a good time. Shame he pussied out tho , as you say that would have been a great time to trip. Shrooms are always healing. 
 

I’ll be honest with you. I think you aren’t giving yourself enough time in between dates to process how you feel entirely.  Before you’ve finished processing one set of feelings and learning why you feel a certain way , you’re out there scooping up the next date to be had. You put a lot of emotional investment into your dates and clearly he did too, to some extent.  I only say this because of the amount of times I hear you say you like someone but you’re confused and don’t know if it’s right and you want to be alone. Not really any advice for you other than take the time to yourself to process your thoughts and emotions fully. If you’ve banded with your mates against me too then just say and I won’t comment on your stuff anymore. I’m here to grow and learn, not to piss people off  

 

Edited June 12, 2020 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Off topic commentary on another member

[Miss Spider]

Foxy no I appreciate you and your input means a lot to me. Thanks. just never get a chance to let loose so I really wanted to. And yea it was super emotional and when he went to work this morning I was really happy to have excuse to leave because I’m super burnt out...exhausted.. You’re probably right. 
 

I honestly don’t know why you and miranda are not getting along, because you both are awesome people. I don’t get what went wrong. Feel like this all based on a misunderstanding that got out of hand because you are super chill people, foxy,  and always have nice things to say here. I’m sorry you’re hurting.

[poppyfields]

I'm sorry Fox Sake, a bit confused.  Are you now suggesting that I am no better than a "school bully" because I posted I think miranda is good peeps and asked "everyone" to be nice?

I said everyone because your comments could also be taken quite offensively, and were hurtful to miranda.  

It went both ways. 

Anyway, contrary to what you assume, LS is not some club where certain  members stick up for each other because they're friends. That's not how it works, at least not for me.

I saw a lot of dissension and bickering, not gonna point fingers as to who started it or who was worse, I simply asked that it stop hence the "everyone be nice" comment.  I did not like reading it, it's unneccessary and adds no value to the conversation. 

I had no knowledge of any PMs back and forth between you and miranda.  

I value your opinions and posts, and I'm truly sorry you misinterpreted my words and took offense. 

 

Edited June 12, 2020 by poppyfields

[simpycurious]

No pointing fingers but I will say that there HAS TO BE a misunderstanding somewhere.  She^^ is NO bully and I would challenge you to read her posts which will show that and then some.  Opinions are just that OPINIONS take from them what may help you then discard the remainder.

Edited June 12, 2020 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Miss Spider]

Also I want to add couple more thoughts...I probably could have got him to do them with me. He kind of left it to me, but made it clear he didn’t think it was the right time, so I didn’t want to pressure him. Last thing I want is someone to have a bad time and it’s my fault 

 

 

**Foxy**i like you super duper.  You’re one of my favorite members here. And Miranda is  too. I’ve never seen you do anything untoward to anyone. It must be some kind of misunderstanding. Which sucks even more. Every Leo I met has been crazy but in a great way. I don’t believe much in astrology, but it’s a coincidence I’ve noticed   

Edited June 12, 2020 by Cookiesandough

[Alexa 95]

8 hours ago, Cookiesandough said:

So I had a weird date with a guy I’ve known since early January. I feel very divided/confused. 

Basically, he lives in a little apartment in the city, but our date was at his parents house out in the country. They have 10 acres so out plan was to camp out  out there and do shrooms.

We did neither.. Last two days I spent with his family. His mom and dad are really cool. All four of us just doing  whiskey  shots,  smoking weed, eating; just chilling. 

It started raining so we didn’t camp that long, but also he said “I don’t think I wanna trip tonight because i don’t want to get weird on you and I think i will because I’m already riding a high and super happy.” I’m like... ??? That’s the best time to trip. So we  only ended up doing like 2g each (which is nothing) and falling asleep. But I was kind of disappointed he pussed out on the trip... it would have been fun. He said he went hard on the weekend with partying so I didn’t want to push it, but for me, getting weird is what trips are about.

It’s whatever, but now *I* feel weird. Don’t get me wrong, I like him, I think I have some feelings for him even which is not typical for me. Some things that put me on guard is that we call each other terms of endearment and favorite people: he wants me to come over whenever/ give me a drawer at his apartment,  he talked me into staying  a second night, and finally I feel bonded with his parents (and also his sister who came over). We talked about some heavy stuff. 
 

Just before he went to sleep he said he hasn’t been this happy in a long time and missed me. It makes me sad because I do like him, but I think this whole two days reminded me how much I love being single again. I actually have a date tonight with another dude I’m kind of excited for too.

 

I do have the feels for him, I like him A LOT. But I do not want a serious thing with him and I don’t want to say that because 1) never ends well 2)may not be on his mind. But I also don’t want to hurt him. We have not have any “talk” since a few months ago when I told him I want to take it slower and as far as I’m concerned we’re both free to see others. I just feel bad leaving now and it’s what I hate about serious relationship  stuff. I hope this isn’t going  to be another case of can’t be with you but really hard to let go. 

 

 

And we didn’t even get to trip together which would have been a lot of fun...Idk this didn’t go how I wanted it to go:...thanks anyone who read... 

Tldr; date went ok, but stuff feels complicated/ I’m just trying to kick it with what’s left of my summer until school starts. We didn’t get to trip because he said he might get weird on me. Have another date tonight with another guy. Will see how that goes. Thanks 

Youre on a roll cookie . 

[poppyfields]

1 hour ago, simpycurious said:

No pointing fingers but I will say that there HAS TO BE a misunderstanding somewhere.  She^^ is NO bully and I would challenge you to read her posts which will show that and then some.  Opinions are just that OPINIONS take from them what may help you then discard the remainder.

simp, did you mean "she" as in "poppy"?   

If so, thanks! 

Edited June 12, 2020 by poppyfields

[Miss Spider]

On 6/10/2020 at 4:02 PM, stillafool said:

What are you again Cookie?

Im Aquarius