Watercolors Posted June 1, 2020 Posted June 1, 2020 3 hours ago, Glx said: I went to an art exhibition today and posted a picture from there. He sent me a joyful emoticon as a reaction to the photo. Just one emoticon, without any words I'd go silent and see if he makes the effort to contact you for another date. Do not let him breadcrumb you. You'll never know if his whole story was a convenient excuse to leave your date with him early, or, if he is a flake and didn't consider your feelings so he didn't tell you he already had made plans with this other young woman the same night he had a date with you. I will say, if a guy did that to me, I'd dump him because that's just game playing to me.
simpycurious Posted June 1, 2020 Posted June 1, 2020 Ever had someone else's date come after you while you were on a date with another? UNCOMFORTABLE.............now those are some serious^^^ poppy flowers side question: can you send a lady flowers other than roses? as in another variety? 1 1
simpycurious Posted June 1, 2020 Posted June 1, 2020 6 hours ago, Spainglish said: Why would he ask you out for drinks if he already had plans? If you're truly interested in someone you're going to set up a date/time that is free . The whole thing seems off to me. Let's just say he is truly interested and he just chose not to tell you about his plan to skip out early. Then, he's basically just a rude dude who isn't very considerate of your time. I foresee more of this type of behavior in the future. Maybe you should pray he skipped out. ^^ Agreed......I am going to take your advice and make such an arrangement tomorrow......dinner and I am going to pay IMAGINE THAT (how scandalous)
poppyfields Posted June 1, 2020 Posted June 1, 2020 1 hour ago, simpycurious said: side question: can you send a lady flowers other than roses? as in another variety? Yeah, send her poppies!! 3
CaliforniaGirl Posted June 1, 2020 Posted June 1, 2020 3 hours ago, simpycurious said: Ever had someone else's date come after you while you were on a date with another? UNCOMFORTABLE.............now those are some serious^^^ poppy flowers side question: can you send a lady flowers other than roses? as in another variety? Roses are really pretty but I like fun arrangements. Sunflowers...tiger lilies...sweat pea... 1
Spainglish Posted June 1, 2020 Posted June 1, 2020 8 hours ago, simpycurious said: ^^ Agreed......I am going to take your advice and make such an arrangement tomorrow......dinner and I am going to pay IMAGINE THAT (how scandalous) How dare you. You scoundrel! All kidding aside. I hope your date goes well. Have fun! 1
introverted1 Posted June 1, 2020 Posted June 1, 2020 13 hours ago, simpycurious said: side question: can you send a lady flowers other than roses? as in another variety? Anything but roses, imo. 1
Author Glx Posted June 3, 2020 Author Posted June 3, 2020 Three days have passed. He never wrote again Something like this never happened to me. Such a bad feeling, when you don’t even know what went wrong. Was is my appearance, something that I've said etc... I would have understood if this had happened on the first date, which would mean that he didn't like me from very beginning. But when after the first meeting he still writes to you (I never initiated conversation first), asks you out the second time, and then they runs away like that ... awful 2
Amanda141 Posted June 3, 2020 Posted June 3, 2020 @Glx I am sorry to hear this. I know how you're feeling... I think this happened to pretty much everyone (including myself). You thought everything was going great, and then, out of the blue, he disappears without any logical reason. But love and logic don't go along. Love is pure chemistry: you felt it, he probably didn't. I know you're probably wondering what went wrong.. but maybe you did everything just fine. He simply didn't feel the spark: probably on the first date he was unsure about you, and wanted to see you again, to give it another shot to see if he could change his mind. Although we cannot decide who to fall in love with, I think he was rude, impolite and bad-mannered with you. He didn't value you or your time, and told you a lie. He was probably afraid and coward to tell you what he though face-to-face. If I were him, I would have at least sent you a message afterwards, saying something like "Thank you for your time, but I don't think we could be a great match, as I didn't feel enough connection to keep going. Sorry if I wasted your time, I wish you good luck". He was completely rude. You deserve someone who can treat you right. I hope you'll be be okay soon! 1 1
stillafool Posted June 3, 2020 Posted June 3, 2020 I wouldn't worry about it OP as he should be in your rear view by now. Obviously it wasn't your looks or he wouldn't have asked for a 2nd date. I think something is just going on with him and the other girl. Don't sweat it, move on to a new guy. 1
smackie9 Posted June 3, 2020 Posted June 3, 2020 Why assume there was something wrong with you? The guy's Long distance GF probably showed up unannounced. 4
CaliforniaGirl Posted June 3, 2020 Posted June 3, 2020 7 hours ago, Glx said: Three days have passed. He never wrote again Something like this never happened to me. Such a bad feeling, when you don’t even know what went wrong. Was is my appearance, something that I've said etc... I would have understood if this had happened on the first date, which would mean that he didn't like me from very beginning. But when after the first meeting he still writes to you (I never initiated conversation first), asks you out the second time, and then they runs away like that ... awful Glx, it doesn't matter what it was (unless you're seeing some pattern that you want to address). It could literally be that he doesn't like the way you chew your food. It could be anything that doesn't actually matter because you don't want to change it for him anyway and because the next guy will undoubtedly not be bothered by whatever it is. When you're with someone and you don't feel "it" you just don't. I'll bet you've had the same thing happen. Right? Great guy, great date but...you're just not feeling "it." That's nobody's fault. Move on. 2
stillafool Posted June 3, 2020 Posted June 3, 2020 The main thing is to not waste time wondering what happened but to move on as quickly as possible before obsession sets in. 1 1
Miss Spider Posted June 3, 2020 Posted June 3, 2020 But notice how the basic human decency seems to be absent in this one. No being an adult and finishing the date you started, then giving a thoughtful message of closure afterwards. Just fleeing like a coward. I’ve done this before and and would give you the same advice that I’d now give to people who were trying to date me at the time : run tf away ... don’t do it ... 2 1
stillafool Posted June 3, 2020 Posted June 3, 2020 No, if he hasn't contacted by now to offer to make it up - it's done. You'll be okay. 1 1
Grey40 Posted June 3, 2020 Posted June 3, 2020 On 5/30/2020 at 2:31 PM, Glx said: Hello everyone, so I met one guy online (both 24 years old) and we met for the second time. First time we went for a walk in a park, and second time he asked me out for some drinks. We went to a bar, the conversation was nice, but then after approximately 45 min he said that unfortunately he can't stay long today. One of his foreign female friends came to visit our city today with her parents, and he wouldn't want to cancel on them. As far as I understood, it happened quite spontaneously (but I might be wrong about that) He then said that "but next time we can definitely go to one of the restaurants we have been discussing" (earlier we were talking about restaurants with good cuisine). I said "of course, no problem". Do you think this is a good reason to leave a date, or did he just flake on me? LOL. I can speak from personal experience, because I've done this to women before when I had 2 dates setup on the same day. I wanted to see both women so had to cut one of them short. Not saying that's what happened, but I know it's been done.
poppyfields Posted June 3, 2020 Posted June 3, 2020 (edited) I agree it could be anything Gix, including something you may not even suspect. Like he could have found you intimidating and if he suffers from anxiety, during the date he jumped way ahead of himself (as many anxious people tend to do) and was thinking that a girl like you would probably cheat on him, or whatever. So he suddenly without warning decided to bail before he got in deeper. Or maybe he realized while chatting with you that you remind him of his ex who ripped his heart to shreds and he didn’t want to go back there either. Or he could be a huge commitmentphobe and a second date in his warped brain is tantamount to a proposal of marriage, and so he freaked and suddenly bailed. And I DO know men who feel that way and have done this, on the first or second date for this reason. As absurd as it sounds. It's their anxiety behind the wheel. What I am saying is that it literally could be anything, you don’t know him, you don’t know his thoughts, you don't know his history with women. So it’s really a futile waste of energy even thinking about it. Remember, it's not about you, or doing anything "wrong," it's about him. Edited June 3, 2020 by poppyfields
simpycurious Posted June 4, 2020 Posted June 4, 2020 On 5/31/2020 at 4:26 AM, Glx said: the conversation went very well, we talked about everything, about the events in our lives that happened since the last meeting. but of course he could be just polite all this time cutting out early is a no go have some class and finish the date
Malin889 Posted June 4, 2020 Posted June 4, 2020 This is only your second date. He should be going out of his way to impress you. If he did have plans beforehand, and he respects you, then he should have told you beforehand, "I can meet, but only for 45 minutes" so that way you didn't go out of your way to get yourself together, get a cab, etc etc. If you knew beforehand, then you could have said, "let's meet another time instead when you have more time". I just feel like this was kind of a blow off. And why is he so scared to cancel with this out of town friend, but he's ok with leaving your date early? He should be more concerned with his prospective new girlfriend (you) than his "foreign female friend" (say that 5 times fast) and her parents. Blow him and his joyful emoticon off. On to the next one. 1
Malin889 Posted June 4, 2020 Posted June 4, 2020 13 hours ago, Glx said: Three days have passed. He never wrote again Something like this never happened to me. Such a bad feeling, when you don’t even know what went wrong. Was is my appearance, something that I've said etc... I would have understood if this had happened on the first date, which would mean that he didn't like me from very beginning. But when after the first meeting he still writes to you (I never initiated conversation first), asks you out the second time, and then they runs away like that ... awful He's a moron. Don't give him a second thought. You'll meet someone much better who doesn't cut a date short.
Author Glx Posted June 4, 2020 Author Posted June 4, 2020 Soo, an hour ago he texted me "I heard a lot of good things about restaurant X. We can go there next week if you want " What do you think about it? Would you suggest me to go?
Amanda141 Posted June 4, 2020 Posted June 4, 2020 Omg that’s unexpected. But why did he way so long?? I hope you’re not his plan B I would tell him sth like “so you’re not dead lol” . I know that probably the best thing to do would be to ignore him and refuse his invite. But I also know that when you like someone, usually you don’t listen to your brain at all Therefore I would accept. I would be curious.. but then I would tell him that I didnt like how he behaved on your 2nd date, as it was kinda rude
Scarlett.O'hara Posted June 4, 2020 Posted June 4, 2020 Would I suggest you go? Absolutely not! But I have a low tolerance for this kind of bs. It's up to you to decide whether you think you deserve better. Establishing strong boundaries is important. Right now this guy thinks you'll accept being ditched in the middle of a date with no warning to go meet up with another woman "friend", and not talk to you for days, then just pop up again whenever it suits him. Think about it carefully. Does this guy have the qualities of the kind of qualities you want in a man? 3
CaliforniaGirl Posted June 5, 2020 Posted June 5, 2020 3 hours ago, Glx said: Soo, an hour ago he texted me "I heard a lot of good things about restaurant X. We can go there next week if you want " What do you think about it? Would you suggest me to go? That sounds so lukewarm. I think you're the backup plan because his female foreign friend turned him down again. It's up to you but I wouldn't even bother to answer. 1
poppyfields Posted June 5, 2020 Posted June 5, 2020 3 hours ago, Glx said: Soo, an hour ago he texted me "I heard a lot of good things about restaurant X. We can go there next week if you want " That's a pretty lame invite if you ask me. I mean we can go there "if you want?" Lol. Jesus. He sounds really insecure and my guess about him is what I posted yesterday. He's intimidated by you. Can't even ask you out properly. Either that or you're the backup girl. The girl he cut your date short for fell through, and he's circling back to you. I'd take a pass, but your call. 2
Recommended Posts