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when the person you ask out/plan a date response?


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Posted
12 hours ago, fred123 said:

i replied "can do".

Then maybe she was just paying you back, letting you see how it felt.  

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Posted
15 hours ago, fred123 said:

has anyone asked a girl or guy out on a date to..... wherever and got a unenthusiatic response? what did u do? 

i recall I asked a girl on the third date if she was free fri or sat evening as id like to take her out to a nice dinner. her response was "can do". i was slightly taken aback by that. i mean if after 10 years of dating she said that then fair enough lol.

anyone elses experiences or what they would do?

Think you are over reacting and reading too much into it.   It sounds like you are looking for emotional validation in a text message.  Different people show enthusiasm with different phrases, and not everyone is into texting...so don;t expect more than a sentence from them.   

I consider "can do" a very positive response.  It is a committed response and a yes.

Now if she said, "maybe, I guess"  that is is unenthusiastic.

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Posted
3 hours ago, FMW said:

Then maybe she was just paying you back, letting you see how it felt.  

no you have not read it clearly

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Posted
3 hours ago, SumGuy said:

Think you are over reacting and reading too much into it.   It sounds like you are looking for emotional validation in a text message.  Different people show enthusiasm with different phrases, and not everyone is into texting...so don;t expect more than a sentence from them.   

I consider "can do" a very positive response.  It is a committed response and a yes.

Now if she said, "maybe, I guess"  that is is unenthusiastic.

yes i would agree with you that that can be the case sometimes. but in this case her response actually meant she wasnt interested. 

hindsights a wonderful thing! lol

Posted (edited)

I once had a girl agree to a date with me by "liking" the text I sent with a time and place, 4 hours after I sent it. Didn't even take the time to type out a "ya" or a "thx."  We ended up in her bed at the end of the evening. 

Don't read into it that much. Don't overthink things and over-analyze things. Just go for it and let the chips fall. A yes is a yes. She could have said "can't do" right? She could have not responded at all?

Go on the date, have fun, and keep the mindset "ahh, she's in for a treat, she'll see." 

A woman's perception and feelings about you can change dramatically a few drinks into a date. Especially if you're not a guy who overthinks and reads into everything and assumes the worst. 

Assume she's into you, assume that it's obvious why women are into you, and assume you're going to have a good time. 

Edited by rjc149
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Posted
2 hours ago, fred123 said:

no you have not read it clearly

ah, sorry, you're right, you said that you used that response a few months later.  Never mind :classic_blush:

Posted
7 hours ago, rjc149 said:

I once had a girl agree to a date with me by "liking" the text I sent with a time and place, 4 hours after I sent it. Didn't even take the time to type out a "ya" or a "thx."  We ended up in her bed at the end of the evening. 

It's another version of a "s*** test" that women pull to filter out desperate, needy and clingy men out of their dating scene. The fact that you passed this "test" by not freaking out for not getting a straight "Yes" from her was a contributing factor that helped you end up in her, and her bed. 

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Posted
On 5/17/2020 at 7:45 PM, miranda561 said:

😳😳 so it should only be a dinner if the girl wants to sleep with him

What kind of mentality  is that 

3rd date and no action of any kind (kissing or touching) is a waste of time. Only invest in someone who shows some kind of affection if you want to take them out for a real nice dinner. Tom Leykis says....

Posted
7 minutes ago, smackie9 said:

3rd date and no action of any kind (kissing or touching) is a waste of time. Only invest in someone who shows some kind of affection if you want to take them out for a real nice dinner. Tom Leykis says....

I dont agree. Not everyone wants to get physical so quick. They would rather know the person first 

Posted (edited)
5 minutes ago, miranda561 said:

I dont agree. Not everyone wants to get physical so quick. They would rather know the person first 

#1 reason why men date....sex. Sex is first and foremost on the list, especially if she hot. What she's all about is just a formality in the beginning. After sex for awhile, and it's great, then maybe they will take the time to look beyond. If they get sex and there's no interest other than that, he's gonna keep his options open and not ask for exclusivity. I'm not saying this is 100% with all men, but a large portion yes.

Edited by smackie9
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Posted
11 minutes ago, smackie9 said:

#1 reason why men date....sex. Sex is first and foremost on the list, especially if she hot. What she's all about is just a formality in the beginning. After sex for awhile, and it's great, then maybe they will take the time to look beyond. If they get sex and there's no interest other than that, he's gonna keep his options open and not ask for exclusivity. I'm not saying this is 100% with all men, but a large portion yes.

Some guys surely have an intention to get into a relationship too sometimes  right? 😂 or find someone to fit into their life  as a whole

Posted
5 hours ago, smackie9 said:

3rd date and no action of any kind (kissing or touching) is a waste of time. Only invest in someone who shows some kind of affection if you want to take them out for a real nice dinner. Tom Leykis says....

Whatever Tom says, the OP seems to be saying they were actually seeing eachother for a while so isn't this beside the point? Either way it sounds like the OP was never happy during the course of this relationship and it was a lot of bitter PA sniping. OP...it really sounds chilly from the get-go. Do you want to tell us the story? Why were you going out with this girl? What happened and why are you curious as to our responses? We were initially really basing them on probably a first date and not on an ongong relationship...context matters...first date would be lukewarm enough IMO for a nevermind ( :p ) in my book, ongoing thing = forget him, what the heck is wrong with me? :p I'm out... 

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