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Are women attracted to a guy with a high number of past partners?

ironpony

By ironpony
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simpycurious Established Member

simpycurious

Posted
Posted
On 5/15/2020 at 5:08 PM, Cookiesandough said:

And btw we make generalizations and assumptions based on past experiences all the time in dating and there’s nothing wrong w it. Just because a guy hit his  last gf doesn’t mean he will 100%  do it again... doesn’t mean I want to date him .. 

or that YOU should date him

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simpycurious Established Member

simpycurious

Posted
Posted
On 5/15/2020 at 4:13 PM, Cookiesandough said:

Exactly... just because a guy CAN get laid easily doesn’t mean he goes ahead and does.,,, same with women. I mean there are guys with  traits that made a lot of women willing have casual sex with them, doesn’t mean they take up the offer. 

I also noticed  a correlation  that the thirstier  and more  promiscuous guys tend to not be as good looking either 🥴.... I can’t prove that or anything. Just something I think I noticed. 

these are good points....I think that "thirstier" may equate with desperation but I might be wrong.  Also, being particular is not a negative at least not for me

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Interstellar Established Member

Interstellar

Posted
Posted (edited)

It’s been argued and proven by scientists from Ivy League universities that there’s a high correlation of successful men (who gets almost all the women) and having a name with three syllables or less.  Famous men with three syllables or less who gets at least 90% of the beautiful women:

  1. Cary Grant = 3 syllables
  2. George Clooney = 3 syllables
  3. Brad Pitt = 2 syllables
  4. Matt Damon = 3 syllables
  5. Ben Affleck = 3 syllables
  6. Johnny Depp = 3 syllables
  7. Leo = 2 syllables

 

Edited by Interstellar
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Miss Spider Established Member

Miss Spider

Posted
Posted

Every guy here just clapped out his name...

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CaliforniaGirl Established Member

CaliforniaGirl

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, Interstellar said:

It’s been argued and proven by scientists from Ivy League universities that there’s a high correlation of successful men (who gets almost all the women) and having a name with three syllables or less.  Famous men with three syllables or less who gets at least 90% of the beautiful women:

  1. Cary Grant = 3 syllables
  2. George Clooney = 3 syllables
  3. Brad Pitt = 2 syllables
  4. Matt Damon = 3 syllables
  5. Ben Affleck = 3 syllables
  6. Johnny Depp = 3 syllables
  7. Leo = 2 syllables

 

3,100 .gov county sites crash...

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TheDao Member

TheDao

Posted
Posted
On 5/14/2020 at 10:49 PM, CaliforniaGirl said:

LOL!!!!

No...

HTH.

I'm sorry. I'm being snotty. Why on earth would a woman want a guy who had had a lot of sex partners...I mean...as an adult I'd expect him to have had a few...I don't care of it's two or three or ten...I'd worry if it was thirty...I don't know.

I was my first husband's second sex partner. My second husband has had a lot of partners, I think. I don't know how many. Who cares? It doesn't prove much...a man might be sexy but choose not to deck a lot of women, or he might be a goof and have gotten it a lot anyway for whatever reason...it's proof of like...nothing...I don't know, who thinks about this kind of stuff?

Stop watching those Youtube videos with the bald guy with the beard...or maybe it's a different guy by now...

Are you talking about Richard Cooper?

Poutrew Established Member

Poutrew

Posted
Posted

Reading the responses to this thread has been an amusing experience.... I'm just wondering how many females out there who say that the numbers thing is irrelevant would walk away from a prospective guy without even saying "hi!" if they found out he is a 40+ year old virgin who has never even been kissed... 😇

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CaliforniaGirl Established Member

CaliforniaGirl

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, TheDao said:

Are you talking about Richard Cooper?

I just looked this guy up...no, that's not the guy I'm remembering. I don't remember that guy's name but he was smaller, skinnier...there must be more than one bald bearded PUA guy. :D This Richard Cooper seems more like he's a general life coach guy? I'm not sure.

CaliforniaGirl Established Member

CaliforniaGirl

Posted
Posted (edited)
22 minutes ago, Poutrew said:

Reading the responses to this thread has been an amusing experience.... I'm just wondering how many females out there who say that the numbers thing is irrelevant would walk away from a prospective guy without even saying "hi!" if they found out he is a 40+ year old virgin who has never even been kissed... 😇

I don't know, but I married a guy who told me he had been a virgin at (sorry, ETA, brain jam) 28 and then married the first woman he slept with and I was his second girlfriend and sex partner literally ever. Literally his second date partner ever, even.

He was a smart and warm and handsome guy and we were in love.

The 40-year-old virgin idea, however, is hyperbole because now you're swinging entirely the other way. You're now talking about someone who might conceivably have something seriously getting in the way of him having some sort of serious connection despite having 20+ years to do it (make that connection, which with healthy non-asexual people generally eventually will involve some sort of sex). So it goes deeper than just in-out. It's a silly comparison to women wanting a guy with a woman wanting "a lot of" sexual partners. A person incapable of or unwilling to do something natural with someone else over a period of decades often acts in other offputting ways.

Or apparently. I've only literally known one 35+ year old virgin. Even my first husband was obviously seriously introverted. So would women turn that man down...you're talking about an extraordinarily comparatively rare case with an individual who may already have issues or just his own personality (that's no crime) that makes him unwilling to partner up, which of course may feel extremely offputting.

But even more so than that, from reading their own words, it seems like the reason men get to be 40+ without having sex isn't usually because every woman has refused them and they can never get dates. Often, as the layers get peeled back it turns out they put a thousand stumbling blocks in there, these demands on what the woman must be like, pure but experienced, a hundred weird little things no woman could ever be and that further complicates things and women pick up on that too...it just all adds up to a really different vibe froma guy who has had sex and relationships but just doesn't swing from the chandeliers rockin' out with his c out or anything.

Now. because most adults today have had at least one or more sexual partners after a certain age, "a lot" to me is bringing to mind dozens. Comparing that to literally no one at all by middle age isn't accurate, you're talking about serious extremes there.

 

Edited by CaliforniaGirl
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Emilie Jolie Established Member

Emilie Jolie

Posted
Posted
17 minutes ago, Poutrew said:

Reading the responses to this thread has been an amusing experience.... I'm just wondering how many females out there who say that the numbers thing is irrelevant would walk away from a prospective guy without even saying "hi!" if they found out he is a 40+ year old virgin who has never even been kissed... 😇

All things being equal, someone who thinks numbers are irrelevant thinks that, you know, numbers are irrelevant.  

Not the personality that comes with it. 🤷‍♀️ 

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Emilie Jolie Established Member

Emilie Jolie

Posted
Posted

It's not like it's a toss up between a professional shagger and a monk.

Usually women are attracted to men who have similar values and ethics to them. I see value in being non-judgemental, comfortable in your skin, open-minded, and faithful and having no insecurities or hangups.

I seek men who share those values. The number of sexual partners they had before me don't factor in this, because it reveals nothing of the person's character on its own. 

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TheDao Member

TheDao

Posted
Posted
40 minutes ago, CaliforniaGirl said:

I just looked this guy up...no, that's not the guy I'm remembering. I don't remember that guy's name but he was smaller, skinnier...there must be more than one bald bearded PUA guy. :D This Richard Cooper seems more like he's a general life coach guy? I'm not sure.

He is a pick up artist, just a different kind.

JS84 Established Member

JS84

Posted
Posted

Sure someone has said this already, don't feel like reading through 6 pages, but I don't think it's the number of partners as much as the fact that it shows other women find them desirable. I also find men tend to be a lot more tolerant of a woman's sex count the more attractive she is. The ones women who tend to be maybe a bit above average or below, men (some) seem to take more of an issue with their number.

As far as the women go, I don't think they're attracted to the number of sex partners as much as what a higher partner count signifies to them. Which seems to be that the man must be very desirable/good in bed/high value/etc. Then they in turn become interested. I think it's just a gender thing. If I see a bunch of guys all pining for, interested in, and screwing the same woman, I basically have little to no interest in her. For women it seems to be the opposite.The actual # doesn't really matter to me much. Especially if it's with guys I'm never going to meet.

But I digress, I've never asked a woman there number of sex partners nor do I see a reason to. How does that even come up in a conversation???

stillafool Established Member

stillafool

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, CaliforniaGirl said:

But even more so than that, from reading their own words, it seems like the reason men get to be 40+ without having sex isn't usually because every woman has refused them and they can never get dates. Often, as the layers get peeled back it turns out they put a thousand stumbling blocks in there, these demands on what the woman must be like, pure but experienced, a hundred weird little things no woman could ever be and that further complicates things and women pick up on that too...it just all adds up to a really different vibe froma guy who has had sex and relationships but just doesn't swing from the chandeliers rockin' out with his c out or anything.

This is even becoming common with female virgins.  I was watching "Married at First Sight" and one of the brides was a virgin.  The groom that got her was not very happy about being paired with a virgin and all the other grooms were happy they didn't get one.  They want women with sexual experience.  The groom that got the virgin divorced her in the end saying he needed sexual maturity.

Miss Spider Established Member

Miss Spider

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, CaliforniaGirl said:

I just looked this guy up...no, that's not the guy I'm remembering. I don't remember that guy's name but he was smaller, skinnier...there must be more than one bald bearded PUA guy. :D This Richard Cooper seems more like he's a general life coach guy? I'm not sure.

Hmmm pua... skinny... bald...🤔 face, voice, and general demeanor that makes you want to punch a wall? You might be thinking of Corey Wayne ?

CaliforniaGirl Established Member

CaliforniaGirl

Posted
Posted (edited)
13 minutes ago, stillafool said:

This is even becoming common with female virgins.  I was watching "Married at First Sight" and one of the brides was a virgin.  The groom that got her was not very happy about being paired with a virgin and all the other grooms were happy they didn't get one.  They want women with sexual experience.  The groom that got the virgin divorced her in the end saying he needed sexual maturity.

But he married her first, so I guess being a virgin in and of itself wasn't a deterrent? So it must have been the actual...well, experience between them that was the issue?

ETA: The thing is...okay, I will definitely sound narrow here. But again...if someone gets to be middle-aged and has never had a sexual partner but is not asexual (which isn't a negative thing, it's just an orientation) it would *generally* seem that something else is up and it's that *something* that may be what's deterrnig people from being attracted...not actual knowledge of a prior body count. JMHO.

I guess in rare instances you could go through 25 or so years of encountering hundreds and hundreds of people but just literally never encounter someone you got along with to that extent and legitimately it could be simply nobody qualified and vice versa even though emotionally and physically you were entirely healthy, but really what are the odds? They're there I'm sure, but wouldn't they be comparatively low? KWIM?

Edited by CaliforniaGirl
Miss Spider Established Member

Miss Spider

Posted
Posted (edited)

Oops nvm just saw “beard”.. Neil Strauss?

Edited by Cookiesandough
stillafool Established Member

stillafool

Posted
Posted (edited)
3 minutes ago, CaliforniaGirl said:

But he married her first, so I guess being a virgin in and of itself wasn't a deterrent? So it must have been the actual...well, experience between them that was the issue?

I don't know if you've seen that show but the couples get married to people they have never met, seen or talked to.  They meet at the altar, marry and then spend a number of weeks together and at the end decide if they want to stay married or divorce.  The show matches them according to what they deem compatible.

Edited by stillafool
Miss Spider Established Member

Miss Spider

Posted
Posted (edited)

Cxxxxx

Edited by Cookiesandough
CaliforniaGirl Established Member

CaliforniaGirl

Posted
Posted (edited)
15 minutes ago, Cookiesandough said:

Hmmm pua... skinny... bald...🤔 face, voice, and general demeanor that makes you want to punch a wall? You might be thinking of Corey Wayne ?

No...more squirreley...way less chin...like a whiny elf bitching joyfully about how much he gets laid because women are dumb and he has the perfect formula and like...he was totally chirpy about it, LOL...but your description made me spit out my coffee...you are the best, Cookies, LOL....

If I have a minute I'll do a search...I feel like this might have been a while ago, though, and a lot of these guys I think ultimately get outed. So he may have been a flash in the pan that just disappeared quietly with his phone and his hand. I just remember him maybe 6, 7 years ago or so (??) on a different forum. I'll check later. If he's still on YT I'm sure he'll (ahem!) pop up.

Edited by CaliforniaGirl
CaliforniaGirl Established Member

CaliforniaGirl

Posted
Posted (edited)

OMG I think I found him!!! Neil Strauss!!!! LOL!!!! Oh gosh he looks like every single guy in my middle school son's band. But he's gettin' the p so...

ETA: but maybe it was way more than 6 years ago? Because the first clip I came across was from 2006.

Edited by CaliforniaGirl
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Miss Spider Established Member

Miss Spider

Posted
Posted

Wait...every guy in your middle school son's band looks like a bald, middle aged guy?...that's troubling

CaliforniaGirl Established Member

CaliforniaGirl

Posted
Posted (edited)
8 minutes ago, Cookiesandough said:

Wait...every guy in your middle school son's band looks like a bald, middle aged guy?...that's troubling

Remember, this is going back 14 years and depends largely upon my own now middle-aged memory :D It's just the whole effect...little...that little elf voice...the little chin...skinny-skinny (at least then) like not-grown-up yet kind of...chirpy...talks too fast and kind of gaspy like ADHD...only slightly grown in facial hair...kind of jumping all around the place...it's like you can see him jumping up on the couch onto his knees with the remote with a serious look on his face to try to get closer to the opposition on the TV on CoD.

This is OT but kind of not I guess...because I think he taught the same stuff about multiple partners, monkeybranching, value or whatever, I can't remember the terms.

Not to worry, the kids in my son's middle school don't look like The Bucket List. Maybe after a few more months in quarantine.

Edited by CaliforniaGirl
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