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Date 1 went well, I texted for the second date and no response. What next?

rkennedynl

By rkennedynl,
in Dating

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Tristian
Message added by Tristian

Folks, things went a little sideways here so I did some house cleaning and ask that we stay focused on the OPs unique situation.

We have plenty of general interest threads for general dating tips, blanket statements and pick-up lines.

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rkennedynl

rkennedynl

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She just sent this message.  I'm thinking no response needed

 

"I really appreciate the openness we have towards each other. For now I feel this is the best thing to do.

Thank you that you still want to be in touch, even after what I said. You never know what the future brings ☺️"

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Miss Spider

Miss Spider

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Nope. No response... Also just my 2cent, but next time if a girl soft nexts you... I would not say anything along the lines of “I’d love to stay in touch “ or “let me know if you change your mind” because a lot of times , that will do nothing to demonstrate value and put you in textlatioship or friendzone territory. If she doesn’t want to keep dating you, she needs to know she made a mistake ...not that you’re there as a back up if she changes her mind. It  would more likely make her second guess her decision if she has to live with it. 

Edited by Cookiesandough
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Lotsgoingon

Lotsgoingon

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That ending is especially terrible: You never know what the future brings. 

That's completely useless and manipulative--just enough for you to bite and keep your hopes up. Move on. The only decent response other than none is to send those same lame words right back at her. 

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Miss Spider

Miss Spider

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Urge... Agree... this is what I mean when I say I’d personally  rather a person just ghost..As opposed to this... This is just dripping with condescension and pomposity.. oh yeah .. “you never know what the future could bring ☺️I mean you could get lucky and  could run out of options and fall back on you.“ Girl, boo...

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Juha

Juha

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9 hours ago, rkennedynl said:

She just sent this message.  I'm thinking no response needed

 

"I really appreciate the openness we have towards each other. For now I feel this is the best thing to do.

Thank you that you still want to be in touch, even after what I said. You never know what the future brings ☺️"

I think I can puke now     Just, please do not contact this woman anymore

She is a waste of your time....

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rkennedynl

rkennedynl

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It’s interesting.  Yesterday two girls I moved on from texted me, one girl video called, and my ex stopped by but I wasn’t home.  It’s like they all reached out on the same day.  
 

I was busy focused on me the whole day so I didn’t notice until last night and this morning.

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rkennedynl

rkennedynl

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On 5/21/2020 at 8:51 AM, ExpatInItaly said:

Don't bother replying to her, OP. There is nothing more to be said. 

 

Thanks!  I didn’t and won’t

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simpycurious

simpycurious

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On 5/21/2020 at 3:46 AM, rkennedynl said:

It’s interesting.  Yesterday two girls I moved on from texted me, one girl video called, and my ex stopped by but I wasn’t home.  It’s like they all reached out on the same day.  
 

I was busy focused on me the whole day so I didn’t notice until last night and this morning.

This is where having a front gate comes in handy.............it stops the DROP BY'S.....

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rjc149

rjc149

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On 5/20/2020 at 4:26 PM, rkennedynl said:

"I really appreciate the openness we have towards each other. For now I feel this is the best thing to do.

Thank you that you still want to be in touch, even after what I said. You never know what the future brings ☺️"

Translation: "Thank you for remaining as an orbiter and reassuring me of my desirability to men, at the expense of your own self-respect. Should I ever decide to call you up in the future as a plan B or a rebound, I am glad that you will make yourself available."

This is why when a girl declines more one-on-one time with you, you shrug your shoulders and walk without another word. 

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Juha

Juha

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On 5/21/2020 at 4:46 AM, rkennedynl said:

It’s interesting.  Yesterday two girls I moved on from texted me, one girl video called, and my ex stopped by but I wasn’t home.  It’s like they all reached out on the same day.  
 

I was busy focused on me the whole day so I didn’t notice until last night and this morning.

One door closes another opens, if you want to revisit them.

 

At least there is interest and options, if even for the short term

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simpycurious

simpycurious

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1 hour ago, Juha said:

One door closes another opens, if you want to revisit them.

 

At least there is interest and options, if even for the short term

This is very true but the front gate prevents them from coming around unannounced 

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CaliforniaGirl

CaliforniaGirl

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Posted (edited)
On 5/20/2020 at 1:26 PM, rkennedynl said:

She just sent this message.  I'm thinking no response needed

 

"I really appreciate the openness we have towards each other. For now I feel this is the best thing to do.

Thank you that you still want to be in touch, even after what I said. You never know what the future brings ☺️"

Oh honey please. For the love of heaven. Do not answer.  She is such an A-hole.

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elaine567

elaine567

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She is trying to be nice because after all she just dumped him for being American and having a mental illness.
She feels as guilty as hell.
It is the same as when dumpers say "We may get together again in a few years time..." they don't usually mean it, it is just something nice to say...
It is better than "I hope you never darken my door again" which may be what they really feel...
It's polite, its said so they leave on an upbeat note rather than parting as sworn enemies...

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rjc149

rjc149

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2 hours ago, elaine567 said:

She is trying to be nice because after all she just dumped him for being American and having a mental illness.
She feels as guilty as hell.
It is the same as when dumpers say "We may get together again in a few years time..." they don't usually mean it, it is just something nice to say...
It is better than "I hope you never darken my door again" which may be what they really feel...
It's polite, its said so they leave on an upbeat note rather than parting as sworn enemies...

Actually this is probably true. Sort of like a “may our paths meet again” to sweeten the bitterness of a goodbye.
 

Although I still think she dumped him because his supplicating behavior eventually turned her off.

If someone dumped me for being American, that would make me damn proud to be an American.

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