pookiejones Posted October 8, 2005 Posted October 8, 2005 my boyfriend is still friendly with his ex. they dated for almost three years and just broke up a couple of months ago. they travelled together, worked together, and were really close. there are still feelings there, according to him. and now, she is going through some issues and turned to him, and he is helping her. he is getting together with her once or twice a week to hang out and talk, and calls her a lot. he paints and has about five paintings of her in his room, and pictures everywhere. should i worry?
blueriver Posted October 8, 2005 Posted October 8, 2005 HOw long have you guys been together? Are they naked pictures/ paintings of her? Hhhmmm, Doesn't sound good. However, dome guys don't even realize their home decor and she probibly put them up in the first place. He might welcome a new decor.
Author pookiejones Posted October 8, 2005 Author Posted October 8, 2005 there are a couple of naked drawings scattered about. and he put up the paintings after they broke up. he did them from pictures of the two together. we;ve been together for almost two months.
Hunny Posted October 8, 2005 Posted October 8, 2005 Sounds like he's on the rebound to me. Talk to him and ask him why he feels obliged to be her shoulder to cry on when he is with you. Have you met her? maybe you might feel better if you did. I personally wouldnt put up with it and funnily enough i was in the same situation a couple of months ago (he was no Van Gogh though!!) I gave him an ultimatum, as harsh as it sounds i said our relationship wouldnt even have a chance if she was still on the scene because as long as he kept running to her she wouldnt find another shoulder to cry on. Dont put up with it babe, your better than to be treated with such disrespect. xx
hooghie Posted October 8, 2005 Posted October 8, 2005 Naked pictures? Put up after broken up? Still has feelings for her? etc. Yeah you should be very worried. I would get out of this relationship before he ends up hurting you. Sounds to me like he is still in love with her and would take her back if he could. You deserve better.
Author pookiejones Posted October 8, 2005 Author Posted October 8, 2005 hunny, what happened when u gave the ultmatum?
Hunny Posted October 8, 2005 Posted October 8, 2005 Basically they'd been together for years and then me and him had been friends for about 8 months, it developed from there and we both knew we had feelings for eack other but his ex was constantly calling and txting (he once had 36 missed calls in 3 hours!), he was at her beck and call and i thought "i aint putting up with this" so the ultimatum came and i gave him a week to get rid of her once and for all or i was gone. A year later we're still together. The difference being though that he told me he wanted out of the relationship months before but basically was being a wuss and didnt tell her. If your bf has openly admitted to you that he still has feelings for her then he's being selfish being in a relationship with you. I mean it babe dont let anyone treat you the way he is, he's keeping you in limbo by not devoting him whole self to you. He's not giving your relationship a chance to blossom while she's still on the scene. xxx
europimp Posted October 9, 2005 Posted October 9, 2005 The ultimatum, drastic as it sounds, seems to be the best choice for you. Hunny's right. Who broke up with who in the previous relationship? If she broke up with him and she's going back to him for support, it's not looking good at all. If he broke up with her, there's a chance, and you need to get him to choose between you and her. Yeah it sucks, yeah she may be a nice person in need of help, but there's plenty of nice people out there and I'm sure she has other friends she can ask for help other than your boyfriend. He's yours after all. Make him make the choice, if he chooses you, get rid of her. If he chooses her, stay away from him so that you don't get hurt. Best of luck with this.
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