kscholze Posted October 6, 2005 Share Posted October 6, 2005 Hi, can I ask you for some advice on my situation? Link to post Share on other sites
BadBadGirl Posted October 6, 2005 Share Posted October 6, 2005 Hi, can I ask you for some advice on my situation? certainly. Link to post Share on other sites
Author kscholze Posted October 6, 2005 Author Share Posted October 6, 2005 my g/f broke up in late may. I didnt contact her for a while until she textd me on my birthday aug 24th then I saw her at a freinds bday party. she was with her new b/f who was an ex b4. Well, she told me she loved me and missed me. then I called her (told her I would) a couple days later and she told me she wants to be with me but she is very confused right now. so I told her to make up her mind. about a week later she said she was happy with him because he would never pressure her and she is done with me. a week goes by and she texd "u mad at me?" and started to say she was having problems with her b/f. at the end of the message she said "sorry baby" she hasnt called me baby since we broke up. Is she done? did I push to hard? I have lost respect and trust since the day she told me she loved me while she was with him. I figure she was doing the same to me. what do you think? Link to post Share on other sites
BadBadGirl Posted October 6, 2005 Share Posted October 6, 2005 my g/f broke up in late may. I didnt contact her for a while until she textd me on my birthday aug 24th then I saw her at a freinds bday party. she was with her new b/f who was an ex b4. Well, she told me she loved me and missed me. then I called her (told her I would) a couple days later and she told me she wants to be with me but she is very confused right now. so I told her to make up her mind. about a week later she said she was happy with him because he would never pressure her and she is done with me. a week goes by and she texd "u mad at me?" and started to say she was having problems with her b/f. at the end of the message she said "sorry baby" she hasnt called me baby since we broke up. Is she done? did I push to hard? I have lost respect and trust since the day she told me she loved me while she was with him. I figure she was doing the same to me. what do you think? i don't really think you pushed too hard. and yes, i think she is "technically done"...as in i don't think she is planning on getting back together with you, but there is a part of her that is clinging onto the familiarity of you, and the part of her that wants to feel that you desire her, even when she doesn't want to be with you. and yes, you can definitely tell a lot more about a person when they are not "with" you anymore. you are probably right about how she acted when she was with you. oh, and all girls at some point tell their exes they are having problems with their new boyfriends. it's a pathetic attempt at getting your attention back. then we feel like we have "options." it's sad, really, but people do this. guys do it too. it's like this desperate need to be wanted and not forgotten. it's the whole "i don't need you, but i want to know that you need me" kind of thing. Link to post Share on other sites
Author kscholze Posted October 6, 2005 Author Share Posted October 6, 2005 thanks badbad. she just loved me so much that I couldnt beleive she was really done Link to post Share on other sites
Author kscholze Posted October 6, 2005 Author Share Posted October 6, 2005 the other thing is that she got back together with her ex after being with out him for a year. she wasnt done with him. Link to post Share on other sites
BadBadGirl Posted October 6, 2005 Share Posted October 6, 2005 so it's not just you, she strings along everyone she cared about. how lovely. move on. she can only play this game if you let her. don't do that. go out, meet new people. you'll find someone who won't do this kind of shyt, even if it's not the first person you date after this, and you'll wonder why you ever bothered worrying about this flighty, flaky, back-and-forth chick to begin with. Link to post Share on other sites
Author kscholze Posted October 6, 2005 Author Share Posted October 6, 2005 good call. I have dated a few girls since and there is one I like alot. Just in the back of my head I dont want her to be done. I guess I want her to want me, but I dont know what I would do if she decided she did. Makes no sense Link to post Share on other sites
BadBadGirl Posted October 6, 2005 Share Posted October 6, 2005 I guess I want her to want me, but I dont know what I would do if she decided she did. Makes no sense no it doesn't make sense, but that's how it is. she is feeling the same way. she wants you to want her....but if she was really serious about wanting you back, she wouldn't be with someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
Dino Posted October 8, 2005 Share Posted October 8, 2005 I'm curious, why was this question brought up to BadBadGirl specifically? I mean, this is a public forum where everyone can read and reply. If you wanted private advice form one person, why not send a private message? Why leave it public for everyone to see? Link to post Share on other sites
Author kscholze Posted October 8, 2005 Author Share Posted October 8, 2005 wasnt meant to be private really, I just wanted to hear from her bc she seemed to be kind of like my ex Link to post Share on other sites
JS17 Posted October 8, 2005 Share Posted October 8, 2005 I have dated a few girls since and there is one I like alot. Just in the back of my head I dont want her to be done. I guess I want her to want me, but I dont know what I would do if she decided she did. You've been on a rollercoaster with your ex for a while now. We always want them to want us, it's a huge blow to our ego when they don't. I know it's hard when you were in love with someone but it seems like she's only made you miserable lately. You have another girl in the picture that you seem to like, why not focus your thoughts on her, have a go at a relationship with the new girl? Link to post Share on other sites
Author kscholze Posted October 8, 2005 Author Share Posted October 8, 2005 js - you are right. I went out with her last night and we had a great time. I almost didnt go for whatever reason, but I sucked it up and it was fun. She showed me affection and It was good to feel that way again I just missed having a someone to care for and someone who cared for me. Link to post Share on other sites
JS17 Posted October 8, 2005 Share Posted October 8, 2005 js - you are right. I went out with her last night and we had a great time. I almost didnt go for whatever reason, but I sucked it up and it was fun. She showed me affection and It was good to feel that way again I just missed having a someone to care for and someone who cared for me. Really glad to hear it. Have fun with her and stop thinking about your silly ex. You deserve to be happy. Link to post Share on other sites
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