d'Arthez Posted October 16, 2005 Posted October 16, 2005 I was not too certain about the 'married' part, that is why I edited it out. But I am certain that the figure of men who cheat in their lifetime is above 50%. Mostly in their younger years, or years of lesser-commitment. The stats for women are about as high. But women as a group tend to cheat less when they are married, than men. The problem is of course that it is hard to know how accurate the stats are you can collect on the matter. And of course, with time things like this change. The stats for cheating while married are considerably lower than 50%. Estimates are that 1 in 3 marriages will experience infidelity (of the physical kind). But of course the likelihood of someone openly admitting the truth is small, so there are reasons to suspect that the actual figures are higher.
stevestunts Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 Most people I know would view time with their partner as a valuable source of therapeutic time-out from the stress and grind of daily life. Seriously, who wants to be spending their free time snottering into a hankie? Much nicer to come back to Mr Sensitive, Caring and Supportive. Preferably with a bottle of wine in one hand and a bottle of massage oil in the other i like your style!
hooghie Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 The stats for women are about as high. But women as a group tend to cheat less when they are married, than men. I think this is because women are less likely to get caught and not because they don't do it as much. So, basically, a lot of us agree that most guys aren't type A. AND that a large percentage of guys cheat when they are married. So, a lot of 'nice guys' must be cheating and many more would if they were attractive or a little less shy). "nice guys' are generally very weak so they will be weak if a possible cheating situation arises and they will cheat- thus making them a**h***s. So, since many 'nice guys' are actually a**h***s- just in a different way. And if you're going to end up with an a**h*** anyway- why not go after the bad boy instead of the nice guy if you can't find the type A dude?
JS17 Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 Wow, those are some staggaring figures. It's a sad statement for our society to make.
jaye Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 But women as a group tend to cheat less when they are married' date=' than men.[/quote'] They do about the same but they are hard to get caught, cus women are good in keeping secrets but men on the other hand when 2 good friend get together they just blow everything. Trust part is what kills them. but women do cheat about the same as men do.
HotCaliGirl Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 women do cheat about the same as men do. no they don't
Mary3 Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 Former Quote from poster : I think this is because women are less likely to get caught and not because they don't do it as much. ----- If a woman wants to cheat she will be very successful at it. Nothing you can do will prevent her from cheating , if thats what she intends to do. And she can be very good at keeping it from you, the fact that she did the deed. I think SO's and society are less forgiving of a woman cheating in general.
jaye Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 no they don't Mis Hotty its the fact not a guess. if i am wrong do a google search. and you'll know. Women are just way too smart in acting up like nothing happend. Well i still stick to my comment. "Women do cheat about the same, if not more then men"
HotCaliGirl Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 Mis Hotty its the fact not a guess. if i am wrong do a google search. and you'll know. Women are just way too smart in acting up like nothing happend. Well i still stick to my comment. "Women do cheat about the same, if not more then men" It is noted that almost all the studies that conclude that women cheat almost as much/more are conducted by men with an agenda. I am open to being wrong, I should clarify that would I believe is my opinion, based on all of the females I know - disproportionately they have been cheated on more than they have cheated, that's my experience too - in almost every single relationship I've been cheated on and I've never cheated on any man I've been in a relationship with, so I accept I might be wrong, but that's my opinion and you're right I might be wrong.
Mary3 Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 Most women cheat for emotional needs not being met. Most men cheat for the different flavors ( sex ) but not limiting a few to wanting a new emotional connection as well...
ClassLady Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 I have had both a bad boy and a very nice one. The bad one became my first husband at a very early age. The nice one is my husband now and I definately prefer him best. Dont really know why we like the bad boys but seems we need to have at least one in our life.
jaye Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 It is noted that almost all the studies that conclude that women cheat almost as much/more are conducted by men with an agenda. I am open to being wrong, I should clarify that would I believe is my opinion, based on all of the females I know - disproportionately they have been cheated on more than they have cheated, that's my experience too - in almost every single relationship I've been cheated on and I've never cheated on any man I've been in a relationship with, so I accept I might be wrong, but that's my opinion and you're right I might be wrong. Most deffinately, i assure you Lady..! well first of all i am not up for just trying to prove you wong but i tell you that women are good in keeping their secrets even from their very close friend are real good in whining. therefor all you hear is "My man cheated on me, what have i ever done to him that he did it to me, all men are nothing but dirtbags and etc." and oh they are also good in acting with all the tears to tear you up and make you believe in what they tell you, but they wont tell you how many guys they slept with. But then there are more possibilities as to what area are they living in. if they lived in projects, then i would say 90 percent women did it. but if they belong to a nice area where most are church going gals possibilities are that they are all clean. it depends. Still women in cheating are no better then men.
HotCaliGirl Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 Most deffinately, i assure you Lady..! well first of all i am not up for just trying to prove you wong but i tell you that women are good in keeping their secrets even from their very close friend are real good in whining. therefor all you hear is "My man cheated on me, what have i ever done to him that he did it to me, all men are nothing but dirtbags and etc." and oh they are also good in acting with all the tears to tear you up and make you believe in what they tell you, but they wont tell you how many guys they slept with. But then there are more possibilities as to what area are they living in. if they lived in projects, then i would say 90 percent women did it. but if they belong to a nice area where most are church going gals possibilities are that they are all clean. it depends. Still women in cheating are no better then men. True...cheating is bad for either of the person who got cheated on. And that's a good point that some people are more pre-disposed to cheating than others - so the percentage between the male and female can vary from location or sample of subjects taken. Someone who fears they will be punished by God may be less likely to cheat than someone who doesn't have that factor to take into consideration...a patholigical liar who covers his/her tracks with less of a consciouns might also be more likely to cheat, and the list goes on, so it is a complicated thing difficult to stereotype by a simple women/men cheat x percentage etc...
jaye Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 True...cheating is bad for either of the person who got cheated on. And that's a good point that some people are more pre-disposed to cheating than others - so the percentage between the male and female can vary from location or sample of subjects taken. Someone who fears they will be punished by God may be less likely to cheat than someone who doesn't have that factor to take into consideration...a patholigical liar who covers his/her tracks with less of a consciouns might also be more likely to cheat, and the list goes on, so it is a complicated thing difficult to stereotype by a simple women/men cheat x percentage etc... True for most part, above in bold need both mean cheating is bad for both 1 who got cheated on 2 who cheated Everytime i look at the picture of "K" i look directely in her eyes and i go "WHY then fu*K did i even do that" But i am still suffering for the mistake i have commited. What everyone should realize before they go for cheating on someone is "There is no going back". You can't undo anyting And now i am thinking that if i could get a chance to goback and change things and for that i don't care what the pricetag says i will pay the price. But i'd like to change it
HotCaliGirl Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 I'm not familiar with your situation, but have you tried talking to "K" to show her how much you regret what you did and that you'd like another chance with her?
jaye Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 I'm not familiar with your situation, but have you tried talking to "K" to show her how much you regret what you did and that you'd like another chance with her? I did but......... for some reason she believes "Whats done is done". she left the state and is not willing to talk to me does not answer to any massages i leave for her, text her she is like just disappeared, no call no massage nothing. i think i deserve it but she didn't. i just hope and pray to GOD that she is happy wherever she is, i mean she can deffinately find someone better then me. who she deserves. But one good thing for me is that< "My search for anyone for myselfe is over", Jaye will never fell in love again, cus love is only to be done once a lifetime
Art_Critic Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 "Whats done is done". she left the state and is not willing to talk to me Jaye.. Soemtimes we can screw up and can't fix it.. Sometimes if we do something...Like show inappropiate anger or disrespect them we create a hurt to the realtionship that can't be rebuilt. I think it's great you tried to apoligize to her.. I'm the sort that believes in apologies and second chances. But once your have tried and she didn't respond then that is your cue to move on..
hooghie Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 for some reason she believes "Whats done is done". she left the state and is not willing to talk to me does not answer to any massages i leave for her, text her she is like just disappeared, no call no massage nothing. As sorry as I am for you as it seems that you sincerely regret your actions, I can completely understand her POV and would be the same way. I just don't think you can go back after the line is crossed. Jaye will never fell in love again, cus love is only to be done once a lifetime . Oh I disagree with you Jaye. It happened to me and if you allow yourself time to heal without becomming completely bitter- it will happen to you too
HotCaliGirl Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 Jaye will never fell in love again, cus love is only to be done once a lifetime That's how it feels when you lose the person you love, and that is how you'll feel until you fall in love again. I've gone out with many men who fell in love with me and thanked me, thinking that they like you would never fall in love again. Right now I'm in the same boat, I FEEL like I'll never fall in love again, but I know I will one day. The good thing is that you never know if the next person, you'll be in even more love. Of course that might not be the case, but the possibility exists, from many who have gone through the same thing. It's like after a big meal you think you'll never get hungry again, but soon you will. Don't give her that much power over you, because sometimes if you convince yourself you'll never fall in love again - which sounds romantic but not always the case, you'll shut yourself from the possibility of it happening. You might meet someone you'll fall so deeply for that you'll be happy things turned out the way they did, but of course that is very hard to see right now.
jaye Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 Jaye.. Soemtimes we can screw up and can't fix it.. Sometimes if we do something...Like show inappropiate anger or disrespect them we create a hurt to the realtionship that can't be rebuilt. I think it's great you tried to apoligize to her.. I'm the sort that believes in apologies and second chances. But once your have tried and she didn't respond then that is your cue to move on.. Art, Buddy i don't know that maybe its only me or everyone is just the same, everytime i close my eyes or i'm driving or say evreytime i have few moments myself i see nothing but her, my budds told me i'll get over it. but i haven't changed since i was seven, i'm too damn into her. i mean if you see she is not top of the line woman anyone will say, she is just avarage, good looking smart. beauty wise i can find so many women more beautiful then her, but there is something about her that i can not describe really attracts me. anyways i thought i should give her sometime to see everything, i'm sure she misses me too but i just don't understand why can she not forgive me, b4 she left i was on my knees begging her but still she left me. i guess i made 2 mistakes at this point 1 _ I admited my mistake and told her 2 _ I WAS JUST TOO HONEST.
Mary3 Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 Thats ludacrious to feel you will never feel this way again. Unless you are 85 years old and feel you are too old for love ( even 85 yr olds find love again ) ...then EVERYONE can find someone again. We are set up for repeat love....Can you imagine if we only could love one person and that person left us at 21 years old ? That means with life expectancy of 85 years you have 60 plus years with NO LOVE ? Not. Live and Love Again. Time will let you know when you are ready....
Art_Critic Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 Art, Buddy i don't know that maybe its only me or everyone is just the same, everytime i close my eyes or i'm driving or say evreytime i have few moments myself i see nothing but her, my budds told me i'll get over it. but i haven't changed since i was seven, i'm too damn into her. i mean if you see she is not top of the line woman anyone will say, she is just avarage, good looking smart. beauty wise i can find so many women more beautiful then her, but there is something about her that i can not describe really attracts me. anyways i thought i should give her sometime to see everything, i'm sure she misses me too but i just don't understand why can she not forgive me, b4 she left i was on my knees begging her but still she left me. i guess i made 2 mistakes at this point 1 _ I admited my mistake and told her 2 _ I WAS JUST TOO HONEST. I've been there before.. Even today there are a few GF's that I've had that I still think about.. But they have moved on and I know that I can't go backwards.. You are just hurting.. Nothing wrong with that and your buds are right ., It will get better.. Some people on LS will say that you did make 3 mistakes.. The way I see it is you only made 1 .. Begging on your knees shows weakness and is not a favorable way to present yourself. But admitting your mistake and being too honest are not mistakes that you made.. They were honorable things that you needed to do.
HotCaliGirl Posted October 17, 2005 Posted October 17, 2005 i guess i made 2 mistakes at this point 1 _ I admited my mistake and told her 2 _ I WAS JUST TOO HONEST. If you didn't make those "mistakes" and got away with cheating on her, you would've cheated again maybe and eventually when she'd find out, things would've been even worse. You obviously learned a lesson you can apply to your future relationship. Like I said, you might fall more in love with someone else and have learned from "K" not to cheat on them, knowing you will gamble losing them. If what you've gotten out of this experience is to not be honest and do a better job at covering up your tracks, which is what you write, you remind me of my ex and I can't help but feel non-liking feelings towards you and this might be my last post addressing anything to you - my feelings are still hurt and raw and I can't handle dealing with a similar type of guy...
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