Miss Spider Posted February 29, 2020 Posted February 29, 2020 But a lot of people have called it ghosting even after one or two dates. No rship. I still am so confused on what it means
simpycurious Posted February 29, 2020 Posted February 29, 2020 I guess you don't even say Good Bye when you "ghost" do you? 1
The Outlaw Posted February 29, 2020 Posted February 29, 2020 2 minutes ago, simpycurious said: I guess you don't even say Good Bye when you "ghost" do you? No. It's a slap in the face. No goodbye, no closures, nothing. Wham, bam, it's done.
mortensorchid Posted February 29, 2020 Posted February 29, 2020 Ghosting is when a potential mate or sometimes a friend vanishes on you. They stop responding to your calls / text messages. It's rather cowardly on the part of the person who doesn't want to be with you anymore. I've experienced this on many levels. I've been ghosted and when I realize they have I text them "I take it by your silence you aren't interested in maintaining relationship. Best wishes and godspeed." It's hard to do but have as much class as possible and go on your merry way.
simpycurious Posted February 29, 2020 Posted February 29, 2020 2 hours ago, mortensorchid said: Ghosting is when a potential mate or sometimes a friend vanishes on you. They stop responding to your calls / text messages. It's rather cowardly on the part of the person who doesn't want to be with you anymore. I've experienced this on many levels. I've been ghosted and when I realize they have I text them "I take it by your silence you aren't interested in maintaining relationship. Best wishes and godspeed." It's hard to do but have as much class as possible and go on your merry way. Having class is never a bad thing.
Daisydooks Posted February 29, 2020 Posted February 29, 2020 8 hours ago, simpycurious said: Is he still with HER? Nope. I dont think he ever even called her again, let alone got together with her. He may have years later for all I know? Not that night though and not for a long time. They were never once together after this as an official couple anyhow. He followed me out of her house asking to explain. He didnt even stay the evening. I asked that he not come home that evening so I could gather my things. He respected that. He stayed with a friend or at a hotel instead, but he didn't stay there. Confirmed by her. She had no reason to lie to me at that point I truly dont know where he went. I think he knew for sure that if he had stayed with her that evening it would have been a bad move. I dont think he understood the scope of my anger and the betrayal I felt but he knew any contact with her would be a nail in his coffin. I am not sure she would have entertained it either to be honest after his stellar performance that night. I think she expected him to stay, and not care that I was leaving because he had made me out to be horrible and evil... (as he had told her we were unhappy, we didn't have sex, we didn't sleep in the same bed, and that I stayed only because I was stuck there financially.) She realized by my actions it was not true. None of those things were true. When I left within 2 weeks, and she had met with me, it was clear to her I was not stuck, I was not evil and I was not the woman me made me out to be We were trying for a baby, so we were having very regular sex (every other day,) in the same bed, and we were far from hating one another. We had one bed and one bedroom. I was on fertility meds. We wouldnt have been trying for a baby if I wasnt at least happy... even if it were true he wasnt. She got suspicious around 2 months in when he never called her at night/on weekends, she had never been to his place, and had never met any of his friends She started asking questions so he told her he was married. When he told her about me, he made me out to be an evil wife who was awful to him, so he was justified in cheating. 1 1
Miss Spider Posted February 29, 2020 Posted February 29, 2020 Wow what a grade A douchewaffle, Daisy. Sorry that happened, but it looks like you’re with someone who makes you very happy now, so it all worked out for the best 3
Daisydooks Posted February 29, 2020 Posted February 29, 2020 5 hours ago, simpycurious said: Sorry for asking Daisy. He sounds like a dirt bag. I am sorry he treated you like that and sorry for not reading enough to recognize that he was your husband. Insensitive of me and I am sorry Dont be sorry. I am an open book here. I didnt feel you were insensitive whatsoever. I think I'd have been less offended if she meant something to him. He threw everything away for someone he never even contacted again. All for nothing. How awful. Had she been important, I may have been able to see why he did this, even if I didnt forgive him for it. But it was all for nothing and for someone he didnt really care about. 1
dramallama Posted February 29, 2020 Posted February 29, 2020 (edited) 22 hours ago, Daisydooks said: Ghosting to me is when all is going along smoothly, and you wake up the next day and you're blocked everywhere and never hear from them again with zero explanation of why. I second this view, though the blocking isn't compulsory - they could just cease all contact. 22 hours ago, Legatus said: @Daisydooks that sounds like something for which term ghosting would be a grand understatement, more like piece of kaka! I really hope you're not speaking from experience.. I've had this situation happen - was dating a barrister for a couple of months, spent the weekend at his for the first time, had a lovely weekend or so it seemed, things were normal Monday, Tuesday - Wednesday I wake up and I'm blocked! Thing is, having been to his house, I had his address, so I sent him a greetings card that said "I've met some pricks in my time but you sir are a f*cking cactus" - I felt better to get the last word at least Edited February 29, 2020 by dramallama typos
Daisydooks Posted February 29, 2020 Posted February 29, 2020 Just now, dramallama said: I second this view, though the blocking isn't compulsory - they could just cease all contact. I've had this situation happen - was dating a barrister for a couple of months, spent the weekend at his for the first time, had a lovely weekend or so it seemed, things were normal Monday, Tuesday -Wednesday I wake up and I'm blocked! k Thing is, having been to his house, I had his address, so I sent him a greetings card that said "i've met some pricks in my time but you sir are a f*cking cactus" - I felt better to get the last word at least You're my spirit animal! 1
Daisydooks Posted February 29, 2020 Posted February 29, 2020 56 minutes ago, Cookiesandough said: Wow what a grade A douchewaffle, Daisy. Sorry that happened, but it looks like you’re with someone who makes you very happy now, so it all worked out for the best Life has a funny way of working itself out. At the time, my life was turned upside down and inside out. Now, 8 years later, I wished I knew then what I know now and wish I hadnt spent so much time worrying about my future or what my future would look like. I lost far too much sleep because it felt like it was the end of the world. It was not. Lol! I made it out ok. I am ok. I am happy. It was a very dark time for me but in walking through that, I had to face a lot of realities and learned more about myself than I ever thought I wanted to learn. 2
simpycurious Posted February 29, 2020 Posted February 29, 2020 6 hours ago, Cookiesandough said: Wow what a grade A douchewaffle, Daisy. Sorry that happened, but it looks like you’re with someone who makes you very happy now, so it all worked out for the best Cookie can sum it up pretty quickly. I like her style. And yes "douchewaffle,douche bag" they both work in reference to that guy 1
simpycurious Posted February 29, 2020 Posted February 29, 2020 5 hours ago, Daisydooks said: Life has a funny way of working itself out. At the time, my life was turned upside down and inside out. Now, 8 years later, I wished I knew then what I know now and wish I hadnt spent so much time worrying about my future or what my future would look like. I lost far too much sleep because it felt like it was the end of the world. It was not. Lol! I made it out ok. I am ok. I am happy. It was a very dark time for me but in walking through that, I had to face a lot of realities and learned more about myself than I ever thought I wanted to learn. You are a quality person Daisy and I am also so happy that you made through all the crap. You deserve the happiness and joy that you are experiencing now.
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