Nate4U Posted February 19, 2020 Posted February 19, 2020 At this time, I’m completely tired of giving and losing so much, I want someone that will take good care of me in every aspect because I have been giving and I keep getting hurt as payback. Added with, I have two young teenagers of my own so I shouldn’t even have time at all for her but I will give her as much as I can but still it’s not enough, she tells me I’m not making no effort and insists I am always busy to the point of not being able to respond to a single text.
preraph Posted February 19, 2020 Posted February 19, 2020 I guess I only have 2 thoughts. One is that it is not a good idea to be more giving than the other person is by very much at least. You need to kind of keep things balanced and reciprocate before you keep advancing the relationship. If you start to be the giver with her and the reaction is not what you hoped then that's just not the type of person she is. you have to realize that no one owes you to be the way you would ideally like them to be. There is no one right way. Everyone is different, and I would say more most people will not be your match. These days someone taking care of you is going to be pretty rare. you need to be taken care of yourself and if you end up living with someone you need to be taking care of half of the household chores. Most women work these days. these days you cannot depend on finding a woman who wants to make doing all your chores for you her vocation. Frankly there's better jobs out there. You've got to set aside your entitlement. and you just need to wait until you know someone and once you see that they are not the person you're looking for then you don't try to make them into it and you just move on. Your resentment is stemming from the fact that you feel like you gave so much and didn't get back what you wanted in return, so stop doing that because no one is obligated to follow your lead on that. There are lots of giving women out there so it's not hopeless. 1
Gaeta Posted February 19, 2020 Posted February 19, 2020 You need to learn to say 'no'. Somehow people have more respect toward others that know how to set limits. If you give your all to your gf she will at some point take everything for granted and she'll lose that respect for you. You'll be seen as soft and malleable. When resentment sets in like it seems to have here, it's usually too late to save the relationship. People can be mad, sad, disappointed and work through it and love is still there, not so much with resentment, it's rarely something you can reverse. 2
smackie9 Posted February 19, 2020 Posted February 19, 2020 You can't force someone to be the way you want them to be. wasted effort. You over invested in the wrong person for sure. She is just realizing that you can't fulfill her exceptions either. Cut her loose and choose more wisely and carefully next time.
Malin889 Posted February 19, 2020 Posted February 19, 2020 Does she have kids as well? She probably doesn’t understand what it’s like to be a single parent. I know as a single parent, it’s really tough to date, and If someone doesn’t understand that my kid is my priority, then they’re probably not the right person. 1
chillii Posted February 20, 2020 Posted February 20, 2020 (edited) Yeah very true , but it's usually opposite from her when it comes to his kids . Even as we speak they're all b@tching over in another thread about just that. Anyway op yeah , don't burn yourself out giving to someone that doesn't do the same , and that goes for understanding too, which she sounds too self centered to have much of. lt's not all about you keeping her happy , this shyt is both ways and equally about her keeping you happy too. Edited February 20, 2020 by chillii
kendahke Posted February 21, 2020 Posted February 21, 2020 sounds like you're the guy one of the posters on this board who is having issues with her guy not texting her on the weekends, going silent from Thursday night til Monday...
kendahke Posted February 21, 2020 Posted February 21, 2020 On 2/19/2020 at 12:23 PM, Nate4U said: At this time, I’m completely tired of giving and losing so much, I want someone that will take good care of me in every aspect because I have been giving and I keep getting hurt as payback. Added with, I have two young teenagers of my own so I shouldn’t even have time at all for her but I will give her as much as I can but still it’s not enough, she tells me I’m not making no effort and insists I am always busy to the point of not being able to respond to a single text. Are you? If you don't have time then you don't have time, so don't date because people expect to be incorporated into your life as time goes on.
chillii Posted February 21, 2020 Posted February 21, 2020 Ahhh, he only did it once , and they don't even sound close anyway. This guy sounds like he's doing more than enough and she sounds like an entitled princess .
Recommended Posts