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Received this text from her after a 1st date


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Posted
3 hours ago, Ruby Slippers said:

If interested, she should have suggested an alternate day - but some people are clueless. Did you try for another day? You still can.

my response to that was "and sunday wouldnt be a good day for what i had in mind"

 

i never got a response to that

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Posted
1 minute ago, K.K. said:

 

Dude, it’s so not over. Why are you doing that to yourself? Give it a chance! 

what makes you say its not over based on what i said about her crying emoji

Posted

Wait - was there a question mark at the end of your text to her? Or was it a statement? 

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Posted
1 minute ago, K.K. said:

Wait - was there a question mark at the end of your text to her? Or was it a statement? 

statement

Posted
  • You asked her out for Saturday
  • She said “I think I have to work 😪
  • You said, Sunday wouldn’t be a good day for what I had in mind. 

Why are you stressing? She’s the one that wants to go out. But she has to work and is apparently upset about it since she used a crying emoji when she didn’t have to. Then you shut it down for Sunday so she’s probably like wtf. 

  • Like 2
Posted (edited)

Why do y’all guys overthink? Enough with the wondering and polite stuff. Don’t let the momentum of the date slip away. Just text her and say “ well let’s do something Sunday if you’re not working.” If she says no she’s working then say “well one day next week I’m taking you out.” 

Shes either going to say “ok ☺️

or “ uhhh no “ 🙄

Bam! End of overthinking. You’ll know one way or the other.

Edited by K.K.
:-)
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  • Author
Posted
4 minutes ago, K.K. said:

Why do y’all guys overthink? Enough with the wondering and polite stuff. Don’t let the momentum of the date slip away. Just text her and say “ well let’s do something Sunday if you’re not working.” If she says no she’s working then say “well one day next week I’m taking you out.” 

Shes either going to say “ok ☺️

or “ uhhh no “ 🙄

Bam! End of overthinking. You’ll know one way or the other.

yeah thats what i will do

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Posted

i think im having negative thoughts because the last 2 times i met someone off Bumble it didnt led to a 2nd date.

 

this would be the 3rd straight time.    Its not like that on tinder, okcupid or craigslist

Posted
2 minutes ago, IntBrowser said:

yeah thats what i will do

I would! 🙂 

Maybe someone else has better advice I don’t know. But that’s what I would do. Good luck! Let me know.

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Posted

Yes good luck to you!

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Posted
29 minutes ago, K.K. said:

I would! 🙂 

Maybe someone else has better advice I don’t know. But that’s what I would do. Good luck! Let me know.

do you think my last text came off kind of odd that prevented her from sending me another text

 

"And sunday wouldnt be  a good day for what i had in mind"

 

 

Posted
3 minutes ago, IntBrowser said:

do you think my last text came off kind of odd that prevented her from sending me another text

 

"And sunday wouldnt be  a good day for what i had in mind"

 

 

I do kinda because 1) she was probably like hmm ok what does he have in mind and maybe overthought that. And 2) you didn’t schedule another time. You just shut it down. I think I wouldn’t have texted back either because I wouldn’t have had a clue what to say. Remember - you’re the one that took 2 hours to say you even got home so she may feel likes she’s the one getting played.  

I mean I guess she could’ve said “what do you mean Sunday’s not good for what you have in mind “ but ehh I don’t know. She probably just didn’t know what to say. Like she’s good enough for Saturday but not Sunday. Maybe she thought you were going out with somebody else on Sunday who knows? 

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Posted
1 hour ago, IntBrowser said:

my response to that was "and sunday wouldnt be a good day for what i had in mind"

 

i never got a response to that

 

57 minutes ago, K.K. said:
  • You asked her out for Saturday
  • She said “I think I have to work 😪
  • You said, Sunday wouldn’t be a good day for what I had in mind. 

Why are you stressing? She’s the one that wants to go out. But she has to work and is apparently upset about it since she used a crying emoji when she didn’t have to. Then you shut it down for Sunday so she’s probably like wtf. 

^ This.  So much this. 

Just ask her for a different day!  Yeah, she could have countered with a day but the crying emoji is her way of letting you know that she is disappointed she can't make it Saturday.

9 minutes ago, IntBrowser said:

do you think my last text came off kind of odd that prevented her from sending me another text

 

"And sunday wouldnt be  a good day for what i had in mind"

Yeah.  It's like you pre-emptively shut the door and she is probably wondering why you only want to see her if it can be Saturday (or only if you can do whatever specific thing you had in mind).  She's probably thinking you don't like her enough to find time to see her rather than focus on a specific activity that can apparently only be done on Saturday.

Just find a day she's free and ask her out.  Your Saturday plan can happen some other time.

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Posted
1 minute ago, introverted1 said:

 

^ This.  So much this. 

Just ask her for a different day!  Yeah, she could have countered with a day but the crying emoji is her way of letting you know that she is disappointed she can't make it Saturday.

Yeah.  It's like you pre-emptively shut the door and she is probably wondering why you only want to see her if it can be Saturday (or only if you can do whatever specific thing you had in mind).  She's probably thinking you don't like her enough to find time to see her rather than focus on a specific activity that can apparently only be done on Saturday.

Just find a day she's free and ask her out.  Your Saturday plan can happen some other time.

the saturday thing involved going to NYC

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Posted
10 minutes ago, K.K. said:

I do kinda because 1) she was probably like hmm ok what does he have in mind and maybe overthought that. And 2) you didn’t schedule another time. You just shut it down. I think I wouldn’t have texted back either because I wouldn’t have had a clue what to say. Remember - you’re the one that took 2 hours to say you even got home so she may feel likes she’s the one getting played.  

I mean I guess she could’ve said “what do you mean Sunday’s not good for what you have in mind “ but ehh I don’t know. She probably just didn’t know what to say. Like she’s good enough for Saturday but not Sunday. Maybe she thought you were going out with somebody else on Sunday who knows? 

maybe i should have included an emoji with my last text

Posted
1 minute ago, IntBrowser said:

the saturday thing involved going to NYC

I get that you had a specific idea in mind.  But what you've inadvertently conveyed is:  Since you are working Saturday and my plan won't work on Sunday, I'm going to pass on seeing you altogether, even if you are free Sunday.

Basically, you've said that executing a specific plan is more important than finding something to do with her that will allow you both to get to know each other.

 

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Posted
1 minute ago, IntBrowser said:

maybe i should have included an emoji with my last text

Whaaaaaat?

No, you don't need an emoji, you need a DATE.

Or maybe you don't - are you actually interested in this woman?  If you are, then set something up.  What you do is less important than doing something that conveys interest. 

  • Like 2
Posted (edited)

Nooooo forget the NYC too much too soon! Too much! Just take her to tha red lobsta ! Lol 

No, any emoji at the end of your text wouldn’t have helped, babe. 

Now you got me overthinking  😄

Just text her and tell her you’re taking her out. All manly like. 

 

Edited by K.K.
:-o
  • Like 1
Posted
14 minutes ago, introverted1 said:

Basically, you've said that executing a specific plan is more important than finding something to do with her that will allow you both to get to know each other.

This. Find a time and activity that works on the weekend. If she's interested and available, she'll accept.

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Posted
18 minutes ago, K.K. said:

Nooooo forget the NYC too much too soon! Too much! Just take her to tha red lobsta ! Lol 

No, any emoji at the end of your text wouldn’t have helped, babe. 

Now you got me overthinking  😄

Just text her and tell her you’re taking her out. All manly like. 

 

gotcha

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Posted
28 minutes ago, introverted1 said:

I get that you had a specific idea in mind.  But what you've inadvertently conveyed is:  Since you are working Saturday and my plan won't work on Sunday, I'm going to pass on seeing you altogether, even if you are free Sunday.

Basically, you've said that executing a specific plan is more important than finding something to do with her that will allow you both to get to know each other.

 

after actually reading it i can see that i can see how it can be taken that way

Posted

whew (wiping my forehead, I'm exhausted. I'm just soooo glad my boyfriend doesn't like texting.

Posted (edited)
39 minutes ago, skywriter said:

whew (wiping my forehead, I'm exhausted. I'm just soooo glad my boyfriend doesn't like texting.

Hahah it’s a lot easier when you’re being natural  and communicating like a normal human being. It’s difficult when you’re aren’t being genuine and orchestrating every little thing to get a desired outcome 

Edited by Cookiesandough
I
  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted
5 hours ago, K.K. said:
  • You asked her out for Saturday
  • She said “I think I have to work 😪
  • You said, Sunday wouldn’t be a good day for what I had in mind. 

Why are you stressing? She’s the one that wants to go out. But she has to work and is apparently upset about it since she used a crying emoji when she didn’t have to. Then you shut it down for Sunday so she’s probably like wtf. 

As soon as I heard work I immediately felt like I was getting the brush off.     The top 3 excuses a woman uses to not to go out with a guy is normally 

 

work, family, or sick..

Posted (edited)

Well.... yea but did you text her yet? 

 

Edited by K.K.
:-(
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