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Received this text from her after a 1st date


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Posted

"I'm home and thanks again for a lovely evening"

 

I responded in 2 hours letting her know I was home.    And she responded in 1 min saying...."wow you took that long to get home,  I glad you made it home safe"

 

Does this sound like a green light to ask her out on a 2nd date?

Posted (edited)

Sure. Most of the time if they're not interested you won't even get her initiating an 'I got home' text. You got that, plus another jokey response (assuming you're not actually 2+ hours further away). Make a witty reply and throw some ideas out for a second date, see what she says.

Edited by Andy_K
Posted (edited)

Why’d ya wait two hours to tell her you had gotten home though? 

She was clearly thinking the same thing by the ‘wow’ and what followed part of her text. 

Try not to play games. (Not saying you are, but just don’t) Do you live 2 hours away? I don’t think so since you said you “waited” for 2 hours to text her.

She sounds like she would go out with you again because of the fact that she responded at all. After probably sitting there second guessing how well the date went thinking possibly that you weren’t going to text, she could’ve easily just not texted back. But she did - green light. 

Edited by K.K.
:-o
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Posted
10 minutes ago, K.K. said:

Why’d ya wait two hours to tell her you had gotten home though? 

She was clearly thinking the same thing by the ‘wow’ and what followed part of her text. 

Try not to play games. (Not saying you are, but just don’t) Do you live 2 hours away? I don’t think so since you said you “waited” for 2 hours to text her.

She sounds like she would go out with you again because of the fact that she responded at all. After probably sitting there second guessing how well the date went thinking possibly that you weren’t going to text, she could’ve easily just not texted back. But she did - green light. 

 

Because the last date I had I manage to kill the attraction with texting something stupid lol     So I was trying to make sure I sent the right text

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Posted
14 minutes ago, K.K. said:

Why’d ya wait two hours to tell her you had gotten home though? 

She was clearly thinking the same thing by the ‘wow’ and what followed part of her text. 

Try not to play games. (Not saying you are, but just don’t) Do you live 2 hours away? I don’t think so since you said you “waited” for 2 hours to text her.

She sounds like she would go out with you again because of the fact that she responded at all. After probably sitting there second guessing how well the date went thinking possibly that you weren’t going to text, she could’ve easily just not texted back. But she did - green light. 

 

Ok I will call her tomorrow for a brief 5 min convo to see what her schedule look like for next weekend

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Posted
17 minutes ago, IntBrowser said:

 

Because the last date I had I manage to kill the attraction with texting something stupid lol     So I was trying to make sure I sent the right text

Oh ok. I got ya. Thanks for the explanation 🙂 

I think you’ll be ok. Good luck. 

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Posted
16 minutes ago, K.K. said:

Oh ok. I got ya. Thanks for the explanation 🙂 

I think you’ll be ok. Good luck. 

I had to remind myself that the last date I went on the girl on a date with never sent a text saying anything after the date lol

 

So I said this feel like interest on her part.   Plus I remember her mentioning during the date how nice of a time she was having,          but there were times that a girl will say let me know when you get home just to be polite while she is in your presence.     

Posted

True, but in this case, the wording she used of “wow it took you that long to get home” says she was clearly wanting your message and probably wanting it sooner because she didn’t know if the date went as well for you as it went for her. 

I would have been a little irritated like she may have been or even worried that you got in a car accident ...s*** who knows. I might’ve not even texted you back lol! 

But she did text back. 🙂 You’re good  

 

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Posted

Yep... clear for the second date.

If she asks why you took so long on the next date, to respond to the txt... just say you must have been in the bathroom, and missed it.  OR... You saw it come through, but were washing some dishes (wet hands) and just forgot to grab your phone again after.

Posted
29 minutes ago, Blind-Sided said:

Yep... clear for the second date.

If she asks why you took so long on the next date, to respond to the txt... just say you must have been in the bathroom, and missed it.  OR... You saw it come through, but were washing some dishes (wet hands) and just forgot to grab your phone again after.

Or just be honest.

Women see right through this crud. Lol. 

She was clearly waiting and wondering if her perception of the date was on point. Hence the wow. If he lives half an hour away, and took 2 hours to say anything, she was probably doubting it went well for him and feeling insecure in the date and made a jokey type response to be silly and lighten the mood. If she responded within a minute, she was clearly waiting. 

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Posted
6 hours ago, IntBrowser said:

"I'm home and thanks again for a lovely evening"

 

I responded in 2 hours letting her know I was home.    And she responded in 1 min saying...."wow you took that long to get home,  I glad you made it home safe"

 

Does this sound like a green light to ask her out on a 2nd date?

Yes, if your date is still initiating in conversation.  Only time will tell and it will be "no" if they slow down or just drop off the face of the earth.

Posted
5 hours ago, IntBrowser said:

 

Because the last date I had I manage to kill the attraction with texting something stupid lol     So I was trying to make sure I sent the right text

 - What did you say?

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Posted (edited)

Yea she was commenting on how long it took you to respond. I see you’re taking a lot of note of response times. Were you really not able to text her back after two hours (that’s a pretty long time for a response) or were you playing games? That kind of game playing may actually turn around and bite you 

Edited by Cookiesandough
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Posted
11 hours ago, IntBrowser said:

Does this sound like a green light to ask her out on a 2nd date?

yes it does.  generally on a first date if I don't want to see her again I won't initiate any kind of communication

Posted
7 hours ago, Daisydooks said:

Or just be honest.

Women see right through this crud. Lol. 

.........

You are right.  I personally wouldn't have waited... and if I did... it would have been an accident. AND... when I sent the message, it would have been... "Sorry for the delay.........."

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Posted (edited)
13 hours ago, IntBrowser said:

"I'm home and thanks again for a lovely evening"

Does this sound like a green light to ask her out on a 2nd date?

I think her first text was a green light to ask her out again. That was ALWAYS what I said/did when I liked someone and wanted to go out with them again.

Why did you wait 2 hours to say - “Me too! Wanna do it again sometime?”

You left her hanging. It would be like you asking her on another date, and her taking hours to say yes. It would be a long few hours...

Women don’t like men that play games. Just be honest and have fun!

Edited by BaileyB
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Posted

Exactly it's pathetic the way everyone does this bs ,waited 2 hours , because l'm not suppose to do this or do that , yawn.

l dunno why your even asking if it's ok to ask her , enough with the schoolboy games just ask her and find out.

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Posted
1 hour ago, Blind-Sided said:

You are right.  I personally wouldn't have waited... and if I did... it would have been an accident. AND... when I sent the message, it would have been... "Sorry for the delay.........."

Yep! Exactly. To me, I see the old "wait two hours to respond" similar to the "wait 3 days to call her after getting her number" gamey.  I dont do well with game players

If you had fun, share it. If you like me, show me. If you want a second date, ask me for a second date. If you enjoy being around me, there is no harm in telling me. One of the most attractive things about my fiance was he didnt do any of this stuff and was very forward about his feelings, as was I.

The waiting game absolutely sucks when you find someone you click with only to find out they are just playing silly time/day games. It's not high school and this takes me back to high school. 

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Posted

I'm in two minds over this:

Assuming you saw her text when it came in, it would have been nice for you to respond in a timely manner and with enthusiasm.

On the flip side, I read her reply as being snarky.  Do you really want a snarky date?  And unless conditions were dangerous, I would expect her to assume you have the competence to get yourself home safely. 

 

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Posted (edited)

Yeah it was little  snarky, but she probably realizes he’s been playing games and she’s pointing out she knows. I don’t think I would commented that  way, but honestly, I don’t think would even considering going out  again with a guy who took two hours to respond after the date without a “sorry for the delay” unless I was extremely interested. I would lose too much interest. 

Edited by Cookiesandough
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Posted
23 minutes ago, basil67 said:

I'm in two minds over this:

Assuming you saw her text when it came in, it would have been nice for you to respond in a timely manner and with enthusiasm.

On the flip side, I read her reply as being snarky.

I agree. I agree that it's nice when people keep it real. My boyfriend and I both have demanding jobs, but it's very rare that we go more than a few minutes without responding to a text from each other and it's been this way all along.

I also think her reply was a little... control freaky...? She's kinda passive-aggressively complaining that you didn't reply fast enough. It's a bit much for when you just met. I'd watch out for more controlling behavior on her part.

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Posted (edited)

She's also assuming that he saw the text.  Now, I'm the kind of person who's phone is usually lost or dead or something.  I miss calls and texts frequently.  Last Sunday, it was off for the whole day and I didn't realise.  Now, I realise that some of us have our phones constantly attached to ourselves, but to not give benefit of doubt is rude.

That said, if I was dating, I'd warn someone upfront that I'm not attached to my phone and not to worry if I don't reply promptly.   It's all about communication.  

Edited by basil67
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Posted
1 minute ago, basil67 said:

Now, I realise that some of us have our phones constantly attached to ourselves, but to not give benefit of doubt is rude

 He just chose to play the 2 hour make her wait game. Not being attached to your phone and specifically timing out a response for 2 hours is different IMO.

I agree not everyone is attached to their phones. During the evening, from dinner until bedtime, I rarely have my phone beside me. That is time for me and my fiance to catch up, get things done, connect, watch tv, have sex, whatever it may be. Most people know if they message anywhere from 7 to 5, I will respond quickly, but after that, messages from me as more sporadic because I put my phone in the other room and plug myself into my life with my fiance or those I'm around 

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Posted

The OP said that he didn't respond because he was working out the right response.  I see his delay as indicative of anxiety rather than game playing.   Either way though, it's an unacceptable wait time given he saw the text come in.

I so wonder why she didn't consider that he hadn't heard the text though. 

Posted (edited)

Nope. I don’t buy it at all. I’ve dated a lot, so I know that two hours is an oddly long time to respond to a after-first- date text. It would stand out to me a lot. I actually don’t think that’s ever happened, but if it did and the person didn’t say anything , like “sorry, my phone was dead” It would be off- putting. I don’t like to text much either, but if a guy says “I had a great time! “ after the date, I wouldn’t wait two hours to say “yeah, me too” if I felt that way. Unless I fell asleep or my phone was dead or something, which I would explain 

 

But like I said op, has pretty much admitted he didn’t lose his phone but he’s playing games and being methodical in his responses. She probably can tell if she has any social skills at all and it’s annoying her 

Edited by Cookiesandough
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