Author zawadi16 Posted February 1, 2020 Author Posted February 1, 2020 22 minutes ago, elaine567 said: The dog text was at a different time. The OP is now putting two and two together and realised that the dog/sweater joke was from his ex... The dog text was 2 days later. So isn’t @LenaBean94 right? by bringing up the dog days later it seems like he’s just trying to be friendly. Like she said, why didn’t he take the opportunity days later instead of bringing up his dog?
elaine567 Posted February 1, 2020 Posted February 1, 2020 Did you see all the texts in between the "I wish we could have lived together" and the dog pic? Also HE sent the dog pic and she replied...
Author zawadi16 Posted February 1, 2020 Author Posted February 1, 2020 12 minutes ago, elaine567 said: Did you see all the texts in between the "I wish we could have lived together" and the dog pic? Also HE sent the dog pic and she replied... Yea, there was nothing there except for her reply to him saying she feels the same way. Then her salutations of “Loving you always.” Then the next text was about the dog.
Author zawadi16 Posted February 1, 2020 Author Posted February 1, 2020 8 minutes ago, elaine567 said: He may have deleted them, no? May have. And if he didn’t what would that mean?
elaine567 Posted February 1, 2020 Posted February 1, 2020 Just now, zawadi16 said: And if he didn’t what would that mean? NO idea. The problem here is that all we know is that a man who a few months ago was about to ask this girl to marry him is still such good friends with her that they are sending "jokes" to each other. Is this about plans to reconcile who knows? BUT for you to get more involved with this guy is probably not the greatest idea in the world, is it? I have always wanted guys that are besotted with ME, and me alone. I have never hankered after guys, who are still mixed up with their ex. I never ever wanted to be second best. It doesn't usually end well IME. Don't let your ego get carried away. You either end up as the rebound, or he spends his time pining after her and takes you for granted, or he ditches you to reconcile with her. 1
Mystery4u Posted February 2, 2020 Posted February 2, 2020 5 hours ago, zawadi16 said: Yea, there was nothing there except for her reply to him saying she feels the same way. Then her salutations of “Loving you always.” Then the next text was about the dog. And you are happy to have another woman, his ex, telling him she is loving him always? Ok..... 2
ExpatInItaly Posted February 2, 2020 Posted February 2, 2020 OP, I don't think you can assume that the door is completely closed between them just because you haven't yet seen a message that directly asks for her back. I know you are trying to put your mind at ease but interactions between exes (especially if they had a rocky split) are rarely as clean-cut and unambiguous as you are assuming it would be if he does indeed want her back. We don't know exactly what happened between them in their relationship, what sort of dynamic they have, how they generally communicate with each other. Maybe this is their way of smoothing the waters after a falling out. None of here really knows. The point is that if he were really ready for something new with someone else, messages that leave this much room for interpretation and suggest an emotional attachment wouldn't be sent at all. 2
Malin889 Posted February 2, 2020 Posted February 2, 2020 He definitely is not over her. “Loving you always” obviously proves that even if they are not technically seeing each other, that they still love each other and it sounds like they are very fond of each other. You should stop contacting him. See what happens after that. He could come back to you, who knows. But for now, his head is still with her. 1
Leojax Posted February 2, 2020 Posted February 2, 2020 He’d go back to her in an instant. She’s the one that he really wants and she wants him too. Just bow out now. whether they get back together today, tomorrow, or next year they’ll end up back together. And if I had to wager, they’ll probably end up getting married...being that he wanted her to be his wife and all... 1
Author zawadi16 Posted February 2, 2020 Author Posted February 2, 2020 Update: So I invited to him this super bowl get together. He hasn’t really been on his phone so I was relieved for a while but then he gets this text... I see him say I completely forgot it’s your mother’s birthday. I hope she doesn’t hate me. I’m going to text her right now. Maybe they’re just good friends now?
Malin889 Posted February 2, 2020 Posted February 2, 2020 51 minutes ago, zawadi16 said: Update: So I invited to him this super bowl get together. He hasn’t really been on his phone so I was relieved for a while but then he gets this text... I see him say I completely forgot it’s your mother’s birthday. I hope she doesn’t hate me. I’m going to text her right now. Maybe they’re just good friends now? So he came to the get together with you when you saw this? How often does he see you? Is he just texting this ex or is he seeing her too? Why is texting her mom? If he broke up with this girl, and doesn’t want anything to do with her, then he shouldn’t be texting her or her family. And who cares if the mom hates him. Why is he that close to the mom that he’d be texting her and why does he know the mom’s number? I’m sorry, he’s too close to them. Even if he was texting her and the family, why are these texts always coming in when you are with him? You would think he would not have his phone out. Did he know you saw the text?
K.K. Posted February 2, 2020 Posted February 2, 2020 Unfortunately, it seems like you should not only proceed with caution, but should do so preferably while wearing one of those hazmat suits as well. Gonna get messy. 3
elaine567 Posted February 2, 2020 Posted February 2, 2020 So you organise a nice event for the two of you to go to, and he ends up more concerned about forgetting HER Mom's birthday than anything else. Wake up! 2
SincereOnlineGuy Posted February 2, 2020 Posted February 2, 2020 On 2/1/2020 at 4:43 AM, zawadi16 said: So I’ve been a few dates with this great guy. He’s the first man who has piqued my interest in a very long while. Last night he had made dinner for us. He excused himself to go the restroom when he received this message. He had left his phone on the bar counter top while cooking and I was sitting right there at the bar. I saw he sent a text saying “I’m sorry to hear about your family it breaks my heart. I just wish we could’ve lived together and started our lives together.” and the reply, the message that came in, said “I feel the same way”. There was more to it but I wasn’t able to see the rest. So I’ve been thinking about this. To me it sounds like he’s just worried about her (sorry to hear about your family). Also sounds like he does not want her back because he said, “I wish we could have”. That sounds like a yea that’s cool, but it’s never going to happen and he wasn’t trying to make it work because he would’ve said let’s fix this to her or something along those lines. This is just how I perceived it. Should I just proceed with caution? I don't sense any red flags in anything you've written. BUT it wouldn't be a grand idea that you should document and chronicle all of the looking at his texts you've been doing. It simply isn't possible for you to glean the full context of both sides and as such, you would do well to leave the whole thing alone. Perhaps the details will come out piece by piece over time... but anything other than continuing to put your own most confident foot forward with each new date/day, works against you down the road.
beentheredonethat77 Posted February 7, 2020 Posted February 7, 2020 Im a bit confused - you said at the Superbowl you saw him text her about forgetting her Mom's birthday -- did you see him WRITE the text? -- or did her respond come up -- what did you see? if hes texting her AGAIN in your company -- this is more than a red flag -- its just unacceptable/disrespectful. Its like being with you only makes him think of her, hence the contact with her in your company .. OR hes in contact with her so much that its nothing to do with you ... either option isnt great. Also, the whole 'does your Mom hate me' -- is such a weird thing to say. Not only is it bizarre for a Man to be so concerned with an ex-fiances Mother's birthday -- but for him to even think she'd care (the Mother OR the ex-fiance) is just odd. Sounds like an excuse to stay in contact with both -- because, frankly, as we heard from the horses mouth.. 'He wishes they could have started their lives together'. I would be not even proceed at this point.. let alone with caution. 1
manfrombelow2 Posted February 7, 2020 Posted February 7, 2020 It's only been a few dates. And dates are meant for both parties to have fun, not to dip their noses in each other's businesses. It was wrong of you to peek at his phone anyway. But I can't blame you. You were only doing what your nature told you to.
Fletch Lives Posted February 7, 2020 Posted February 7, 2020 It sounds like he's not completely done with his girlfriend yet. Not good.
stillafool Posted February 7, 2020 Posted February 7, 2020 Wait until this ex girlfriend finds out he's seeing you and then the heat will really get turned up. She still wants him and is not letting go. When I broke up with someone that included their family. He's still worrying about pleasing his future mother in law (I mean ex girl friends mother). Who does that? Especially a man. They are going to get back together.
ExpatInItaly Posted February 7, 2020 Posted February 7, 2020 On 2/2/2020 at 11:42 PM, zawadi16 said: I see him say I completely forgot it’s your mother’s birthday. I hope she doesn’t hate me. I’m going to text her right now. Maybe they’re just good friends now? No, he's still looking for ways to stay attached to her. 1
Recommended Posts