Angel29 Posted January 26, 2020 Posted January 26, 2020 (edited) I met a man at a walking group about 3 years ago. I only saw him a couple times, within this time I have been busy pursuing other goals in my career and travel. When I did see him on walks he seemed socially awkward and I don't think he has been in a relationship even though he is in his 40s. For 2 and a half years he has messaged me every week. I feel like he is waiting on me to come back as some of the things he messages me you can tell he sees me as a romantic option. There are some things I don't like about him. He has more than the average friends on Facebook. He meets all of these people through walking groups, meetups and social clubs in his town. I have also noticed he is always on Facebook when I log on. One pet hate is he feels the need to share 'jokes' in my inbox some which are offensive to women and a bit sexual. I don't know why he is so obsessed with me. We virtually have nothing in common, he drinks a lot and has only recently secured a full time job. He did have a part time job but always messed up interviews for full time work which doesn't surprise me as he probably hardly practiced for interviews as he was always online. Why does he think I would want to date a social media addict who is a blatant socialite as sometimes he never remembers important things about me. He will even message me to say how my football team has lost but never mentions when his team loses. Why would I want to hear about my football team losing as that is negative news. He tends to dwell on his mother a lot who has passed, I know this is extremely difficult but I feel he should seek counselling and not keep telling me how his life has been majorly affected. I don't feel equipped to deal with another person's emotions in relation to bereavement who I have probably only met 8 times. I am positive person and know this man is not right for me. I want to meet a man who does have a friends and goals but is not so fixated on meeting new people all the time or not improving his life. How can I get rid of this drain? Edited January 26, 2020 by Angel29
preraph Posted January 26, 2020 Posted January 26, 2020 Why haven't you just blocked him? block him from your email, block him from your phone number, and block him from your social media. And you may have to give up your walking group. 2
smackie9 Posted January 26, 2020 Posted January 26, 2020 You have him as a friend on fb and you don’t express you disgust in his off color jokes so what is he going to think? He’s gonna think you ok with it. He ain’t no mind reader. For the love of god just block him already . 1
introverted1 Posted January 26, 2020 Posted January 26, 2020 Have you been replying? Does he perhaps think you are a willing participant in these exchanges? I think that, before blocking him, you can/should just tell him you are not interested in him or in carrying on messaging.
schlumpy Posted January 26, 2020 Posted January 26, 2020 Quit interacting with him on FB. If he has some commonsense he will get the message. If he doesn't quit trying to contact you, then this could be a problem for you. This can't be a surprise to you, can it? 1
Gold Pile Posted January 26, 2020 Posted January 26, 2020 Tell him you're dating a wonderful guy. Tell him like its just small talk to you. That should cool him off. If he keeps stuffing your inbox. Tell him your FB is getting overwhelming and you're unfriending/blocking all but your closest friends. I am willing, because I'm a nice guy, to ravish you in front of him. That should do it. I'm glad to help, just buy me lunch
Zippy2000 Posted January 27, 2020 Posted January 27, 2020 The question is you mention you only have met you a couple of times. Then who added who on Facebook? I do not really add people on FB unless I ve met or chatted with them for over 3-4 times in real life first. If you want to get rid of him then you just remove him as a friend on FB. He doesn't owe you anything and youre not that close. If he sees you have removed him then maybe he will understand. If you don't want to remove him then understandably so as some people do get upset or get angry over this. All you can do is just ignore his messages,
kendahke Posted January 27, 2020 Posted January 27, 2020 Do you want him to magically become someone else so you don't have to take responsibility of getting what you want--which is for him to leave you alone? You can unfriend/block him on facebook. You don't owe him anything. Or do you?
OnlyHonesty Posted January 28, 2020 Posted January 28, 2020 You say you are a positive person but only mentioned negatives about this guy. The solution to all of the issues you mentioned is to enforce the boundaries that you have. In other words either tell him you aren't interested in hearing from him again, or simply block him. I'm sure he will just move on to someone else in his circle.
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