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Is it OK for a MW to be good friends with a MM

treehugger12

By treehugger12
in Friendship

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d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

Posted
Posted (edited)
12 hours ago, treehugger12 said:

That was a different guy, we ended up being friends and see each other through work sometimes. 

Ah . . . no.  This is another reason that your "friendship" with this new married guy is a farce too.  You can't be "friends" with your former AP.  That is ridiculous that you interact with him in any fashion.  Why do you even still work at the same company?  You have poor boundaries & you insist on doing things that damage your marriage.  

Every male friend I have is known to my husband.  DH knows about our interactions & the other men are all supportive of our marriage.  You can't say the same thing.  

You need to learn transparency & you need to do things to bolster not damage your marriage.  

Edited by d0nnivain
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Ellener Established Member

Ellener

Posted
Posted

'Is it OK for a MW to be good friends with a MM?'

Probably not.

At best you'll be taking energy away from your marriage ( especially if husband doesn't know so it's not bringing anything to your primary relationship ) At worst you'll end up filling gaps in your marriage and having an affair.

vla1120 Established Member

vla1120

Posted
Posted
17 hours ago, treehugger12 said:

I am a married woman of 28 years and I've become good friends with a married man of 37 years. It started out as just a little crush over a year ago, flirting and laughing. We'd see each other once a week through work. We have made it clear with each other that it would not ever go further so we are on the same page. We enjoy each others company, occasionally have lunch together and we are very comfortable with each other, I feel like we click so well. My question is, is this ok? I love being friends with him. I don't want to give up a great friendship because we are of the opposite sex and we are married. He is very happy in his marriage and I don't believe he is looking for anything else but us being friends.

Ahhhh, No. You've already crossed the threshold by defining it as "started out as just a little crush...flirting and laughing." You "don't believe" he is looking for anything else - which leaves the door open for the possibility that he IS, in fact, going to end up looking for "something else." You also said your spouses are not aware of your "friendship." This is a recipe for disaster. Either include your spouses or stop it altogether.

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