axk094 Posted January 3, 2020 Posted January 3, 2020 I met this amazing girl online. We had amazing chemistry, would send very long text messages daily and shared too many things in common. In person she said no one has ever treated her so well, she had the best evenings with me and I was her ideal type. After a couple of dates she asked me if she could see me again for another date. But I mentioned I was going away for two weeks. During these two weeks we kept in contact daily but I began to notice she was pulling away a bit. When I got home I asked when she was free for that date. She mentioned she needs to find the time so asked when I was free instead (with a smiley face). I said this upcoming weekend but she said she would have to let me know as she was helping out her family look after her grandma. I said some other time and she said yeah we'll make it work. A week later I ask her out again. She doesn't respond and a few days later I check if she's okay...She sends me a long text explaining that the honest truth is she doesn't have much time to give me and is going through some "major" things that have happened to her recently. She mentioned that something serious happened to her when she travelling before we met and its taking her time to get over it (it caused her to come home early due to the seriousness of it which she wont tell me). She then mentions that she wants to be "friends for now" but its "not a NO for anything ever happening", just this moment in time. I replied saying don't worry, its just the wrong timing, reach out if you want to reconnect in the future. She then replies saying she's in awe of me and has never respected a man like me before because I was understanding of her situation. She said the truth is I am honestly perfect and it sucks she's not in the right headspace and doesn't want to lose me because she cares about me. This girl is everything I've dreamed about - I don't want to date anyone else because they don't compare to her in terms of personality, value, goals and what I look for. its now been three weeks since we last spoke. What do I do? Do I forget about her and move on? Can I win her back and how? Any help would be appreciated. I am thinking of wishing her a happy new year and seeing how she is. is this a bad idea?
VIOLET EDEN Posted January 3, 2020 Posted January 3, 2020 Not a bad idea to wish her new years, but you have to think about how much you are willing to wait before you move on. There are other people waiting for you, but if you really like her, then go ahead and wait a month, but I suggest go out and have fun
kendahke Posted January 3, 2020 Posted January 3, 2020 how long are you willing to wait for a 50/50 chance that she's still not ready to date you?
ThorntonMelon Posted January 3, 2020 Posted January 3, 2020 Quote This girl is everything I've dreamed about - I don't want to date anyone else because they don't compare to her in terms of personality, value, goals and what I look for. You went out a couple times. This is as much a you issue as a her issue. My advice is to assume she's just not that into you and she's been using these 5 weeks (three not spoken plus it sounds like a couple more where you were trying to chase her for a date) to date other men. Forget she exists. If she at some point in the future reaches out - fantastic, you get to decide then what you wanted to do - but this "dream woman" views you as disposable. And I don't say that harshly, I say it as a matter of fact so that you can try to see it in context and make decisions that are healthy for yourself.
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