Winger Posted October 3, 2005 Posted October 3, 2005 Hey Loveshackers, My girlfriend broke up with me a couple of months ago and it wasn't a clean break. I saw her a lot afterward while I was moving out and taking care of odds and ends. I was very weak and I couldn't be around her without breaking down and asking the same questions over and over. She was sympathetic at first, but then she got frustrated with my weakness. Sometimes, on the contrary, we got along really well, laughed, and even made love a few times. She told me that she doesn't know what the future holds anymore but what we have is special and that she loves me. A few weeks ago, I was a total mess and she decided to initiate "no contact" with me because we both weren't healing - me especially. I've cracked and broken it like 4 or 5 times. Two of which led to us getting together and being physical - the last of which being last Tuesday on her birthday. Just this weekend I called to ask the same questions that I already know the answers to and to try and win her back, and she got really frustrated and said that I'm not giving her the space she needs. I need to go through with this and I need to heal - but I feel as though I look pathetic to her now and I just want to re-establish myself as confident and composed again. It would be so much easier for me to heal if she didn't think I was weak. Is it too late for this? Have I destroyed any chance of leaving this relationship with my dignity? I made the attempt last night to initiate a date with a girl I know...actually a girl I dated back in early high school. So we're going to a concert together. But I wish that my ex-girlfriend could see me standing on my feet again and not being needy. If I go through with no contact from this point forward, can I save some face? Will she start wonder why I haven't called and call me? I'd like to see her crack at least once...just to boost my ego. I think it's possible because she still loves me.
westernxer Posted October 3, 2005 Posted October 3, 2005 The only way to save face is to move forward, which it sounds like you're doing. Whether or not your ex knows this is not important. Actions speak louder than words. Do it for yourself, not for show. Whatever happened in the past... just chalk it up to experience.
brittanyjean259 Posted October 5, 2005 Posted October 5, 2005 yeah you really shouldent do anything just to show....than deep down inside you really wouldent have any dignity at all. no rebounds. and dont going back to ex girlfriends ...your supposed to move forwards not back wards mon. a part of her strength could be feeding off the lack of your courage to move on..you cant let her see you like that. start now and dont go back unless you start all over i had a badddddddd break up and regret going over their and breaking this girls phone..because im sure my ex enjoyed seeing me in pure pain i know its hard hard hard hard, wanting them to call you blah blah blah but you cant change whats been done and sooner than you know youll be fine:)
brittanyjean259 Posted October 5, 2005 Posted October 5, 2005 sorry about saying" dont go calling ex girlfriends" i miss read that!
JhnZ71 Posted October 5, 2005 Posted October 5, 2005 Yea, man do i know what your going through!! I broke down right in front of her, i think it is easier for girls to move on if they see that they have someone to fall back on if things dont work. The best thing to do is just to cut your losses and move on. Then shell regret what she did and maybe if your lucky contact you and say that you could try things again.
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