Magicmontazzle Posted December 10, 2019 Posted December 10, 2019 So I have been OLD with mixed success past 1 year Met a guy my age from local area - he was texting me constantly, double texting etc. Went out with him a third time at the weekend for pizza. During the third date pizza he had to leave following a phone call from his sister than his girlfriend was having a mental breakdown at their family home! WTF! I literally paid the tab and flagged a taxi to home. He said initially they had broken up six months ago and he broke up with her as she was using him for money or something. Thankfully I had not been physical. Honestly am I just unlucky or is this OLD s*** you have to go through to meet someone decent?
Double D Posted December 10, 2019 Posted December 10, 2019 Sorry about that. That sounds rather disappointing to say the least. Sadly I think this is just generally some of the crap to have to go through until you meet someone decent, regardless through OLD or IRL. 1
Author Magicmontazzle Posted December 10, 2019 Author Posted December 10, 2019 yes disappointing indeed
d0nnivain Posted December 10, 2019 Posted December 10, 2019 OLD was the worst thing I ever did. You will find a better quality of people through in person events. I didn't encounter a single well balanced person with meaningful social skills on there. While I don't know the whole story, it is possible that he broke up with the drama queen when he told you but she refused to get the message so she showed up out of the blue & caused a scene. It's not his fault but you best steer clear of that mess. Happy hunting. 1
PegNosePete Posted December 10, 2019 Posted December 10, 2019 41 minutes ago, Double D said: Sadly I think this is just generally some of the crap to have to go through until you meet someone decent, regardless through OLD or IRL. Yeah, OLD is just a way of meeting people. How they act after that is on them. The same thing would have happened whether you met him at a bar, in the supermarket or at the gym. You do get some tools on OLD but with practice and experience you can filter most of them out after a few messages, before meeting. 3
preraph Posted December 10, 2019 Posted December 10, 2019 Aw, man. He still calls her his girlfriend and they are still involved. I guess all you can do is thank your lucky stars that it slipped out that he had one. What a prize that one was. Ugh. Well, that was your jerk of the month. But there are good guys out there, so don't lose hope. You might need to meet them in person locally so you see them in action first. 1
smackie9 Posted December 10, 2019 Posted December 10, 2019 Wow he lied about everything. He's cheating on his GF, and he's a leech, ...preying on innocent women and their wallets!
Author Magicmontazzle Posted December 10, 2019 Author Posted December 10, 2019 Awful isnt it. I sent a polite text the next day to call the whole thing off - Should have laid into him verbally!
d0nnivain Posted December 10, 2019 Posted December 10, 2019 (edited) No you should not have laid into him verbally. You did the more honorable thing. Good for you for taking the high road. Edited December 10, 2019 by d0nnivain 2 1
Ruby Slippers Posted December 10, 2019 Posted December 10, 2019 I've done OLD a few times with middling results. This time, within a week I met an amazing man and we're about to go out of town together for a snowy mountain Christmas/NYE holiday, are essentially living together and happy as clams. He had a similar experience on dating sites - lots of first dates, but middling results. Several times now he's joked that he feels the urge to give the owner of that dating site $1,000,000 for bringing us together 1
scooby-philly Posted December 11, 2019 Posted December 11, 2019 I think there's not much to address with this specific instance or guy. Steer clear - because even if he's telling the truth, there's drama there you don't need to be around or get involved in. As for your comment about OLD - I think there's a couple of things I've learned over the years: OLD is no better/worse than other forms of meeting people. I did a number of singles things 8-9 years ago - some even sponsored by a dating site - and they were terrible - people were either way too annoying for me or didn't have social skills or didn't say much as they were there with a friend or more. You just can't put all your eggs in one basket. Have an honest profile - but don't write about not wanting to talk to douchebags or comments about guys with shirtless selfies. Focus on who you are, what you want, and what you want/need/like in a profile Most people don't learn how to get in touch with their emotions, do the work on themselves they need to, and live pretty superficial lives. If you want to find someone - get in touch with yourself - it helps project the right aura into the world and you generally attract what you give out. Doesn't mean everyone you meet will be dating material or the right person - but you will not lose any sleep or emotional energy over them. From a guy's perspective - yes, have a bio! And don't have the same type of photos over and over. If I see someone with nothing buy party pics, ouch. Or no pics in a relaxed atmosphere where you're not dressed to the nines, or no pics of you with a friend or more, or no pics ....you get the point. Be firm in your behavior and have open, honest conversation for a week or two before meeting - and then meet and then analyze post first-date. Who knows, you may have had a wonderful conversation with this one guy you mentioned for the stuff to hit the fan after, but that's the process you got to go through. Don't focus on it. I'm a firm believer that you meet someone when you're just in the zone being yourself and living your life. But you've also got to leave signs for a guy to be able to come up to you and break the ice. No RBF please. 1
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