Geminifeed Posted November 22, 2019 Posted November 22, 2019 My ex fiance and I broke up in January and he's been with his new gf (his coworker) since he left. We were together for 14 years. Yesterday was our anniversary and he posted negative relationship quotes about me/why he left on Instagram. Why is he still doing this if he's "happy and in love with his soulmate"?
healing light Posted November 22, 2019 Posted November 22, 2019 Whenever anyone goes out of their way to talk crap about an ex, I assume they haven't fully processed the breakup and aren't completely over that person. No one here is a mind reader, but I'd guess if he did that on your would-be anniversary, it's not all paradise in his rebound relationship. Either way, I think the best thing you can do is to ignore his social media so that you can continue to heal and find a partner that is mutually satisfying and deserving of your time and attention.
schlumpy Posted November 22, 2019 Posted November 22, 2019 Why is he still doing this if he's "happy and in love with his soulmate"? Because the grass isn't any greener on his side of the hill and 14 years of bonding trumps a eight month relationship. Are you still open for him to come back?
Author Geminifeed Posted November 22, 2019 Author Posted November 22, 2019 Because the grass isn't any greener on his side of the hill and 14 years of bonding trumps a eight month relationship. Are you still open for him to come back? Yea I am. Even though I know it's probably not the best idea because of the things he did during the break up, I still love him. I tried for months to get him back but he stuck with his choice of being with the new girl. In my opinion his actions (it's a very long story) have definitely shown that he still has feelings for me but I guess it's not enough.
Marc878 Posted November 22, 2019 Posted November 22, 2019 When you chase they usually move farther away. Block everything. You'll be better off
schlumpy Posted November 22, 2019 Posted November 22, 2019 I still love him. I tried for months to get him back but he stuck with his choice of being with the new girl. In my opinion his actions (it's a very long story) have definitely shown that he still has feelings for me but I guess it's not enough. I agree with your assessment that he still has feelings and is trying to find a path back. If you want that to happen you have to show him that you can live without him. But if he does come back do not make the mistake of welcoming him with no consequences. You will just invite similar behavior in the future. Consider have a couples counselor set up and waiting and make him work hard to get back under your good graces. If he won't put the effort in then why have him around? A dog or cat would be just a gratifying, especially a dog.
d0nnivain Posted November 22, 2019 Posted November 22, 2019 I suppose the fact that you want him back explains why you are still connected on IG. Staying connected on social media after a break up only hurts you because you have to see his happy new life & you have to read these posts. The fact that he posted on your anniversary means he does still remember that date. Sentimentality is no reason to reconcile if the other problems in your relationship still exist. Hang in there. When you fully separate & accept that it's truly over, the healing begins in earnest. Best wishes
kendahke Posted November 22, 2019 Posted November 22, 2019 because he knows you're still checking for him. If you weren't, you wouldn't know this and it would be taking up so much real estate in your imagination.
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