dcgirl Posted October 2, 2005 Posted October 2, 2005 i'll start by saying...yes, i've heard of "he's just not that into you." i've skimmed it and read a gajillion posts here and elsewhere about it. mind you, the posts aren't directed at me or this situation, but i know the story, the philosophy, etc. my situation is: a girl goes on a great second date. when i say great, i mean great. no sex, but i wasn't looking for it. anyway, great conversation, lots and lots in common, same twisted sense of humor. never a lull in the conversation. and this was after talking for two hours the night before and nearly as long the night before that. at the end of this great date, we're both hankering to hang out again. the interest and some sparks are there. we make plans, kiss and whatnot. all warm and fuzzy and butterflies and giddiness. within 36 hours: girl gets an email saying that he has met someone else. but let's be friends because you're totally cool; that is, if you (I) want to. question: or rather, a statement....this is just weird and kinda perplexing. it may be totally true. he found someone he's really into. or totally false. maybe he was seeing someone and it moved to another level in the 36 hours between our great date and the email. the slight overanalysis is due to the fact that it's rare to meet someone with whom you click on so many levels. rare given how ridiculously hectic my life is right now. and i know you're saying two dates and a few long phone calls...big whoop. but really my life is hectic and busy. in a lot of ways, dating is out of the question for the next few months. i know the possibilities at play. and accept them. i guess i'm still scratching my head over it. i guess more than anything i'm just bummed out. i'm so incredibly busy with life that it's hard to meet someone cool and when you do, you think...ah, breath of fresh air. oh well, there is that saying about buses to comfort me.
RainyDayWoman Posted October 2, 2005 Posted October 2, 2005 oh well, there is that saying about buses to comfort me. i don't think i know that saying....please share?
Author dcgirl Posted October 2, 2005 Author Posted October 2, 2005 if you wait fifteen minutes, another one will come by. another way...there are other fish in the sea. both of which are very very true.
Outcast Posted October 2, 2005 Posted October 2, 2005 Two possibilities: you thought you clicked and he didn't. Oddly enough, two people can go on the same date and report back very different impressions. Or he's not interested as much in 'clicking' as possibly in some other verb ending in 'ing'. People don't necessarily get into relationships with people they get along wonderfully with, even though it makes sense to do so. People are often not sensible. It's just one of those bizarre and tiresome life incidents.
konfuzd Posted October 2, 2005 Posted October 2, 2005 It is true (busses & fish), but doesn't change the frustration of it all. As much as guys like to think they are simple creatures, that is far from true. It sounds like this guy was the drunk bus driver, starting to drive you towards your destination, then dropping you off at the wrong stop, leaving you to find your way back... sorry 'bout your luck. Wish there was some more advice I could give you, but at least let you know that I've been there far too many times before, and can identify with your dissapointment in it all. Good luck!
Author dcgirl Posted October 2, 2005 Author Posted October 2, 2005 thanks for the input. all the above ran through my mind. anything really is possible. i take people at face value...can't help myself. but i'm old enough to have developed a decent b.s. detector. i assumed he was interested judging from how enthusiastic he was to make plans again. as far as sex goes...there was no pressure, no asking to come in, etc. neither one of us put it out there. then out of the blue...i've met someone else. he said it as though i was hoping to be his girlfriend. when all i was looking forward to was getting to know him better. go figure. oh well...like i said...other fish, buses, and all that.
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