Just dont know if this is all in my head and how to ask him to hang out.

[post1126]

Hi there guys

 

Just want to know if this guy seems interested or not. I'm a couple years older than him. I don't want a relationship, only want to get sexually involved.

 

So basically we work together doing admin. Hes extremely attractive and gorgeous. For the first year, we barely spoke as I'm awkward and really shy.

 

It took me a year to get out my shell with him and when we did start talking, it was mostly sex. I mean, wed always support each other through things and talk about colleagues but our chats would turn to sexual stuff, with him starting the convo

 

He had a girlfriend before and when they broke up, he said he djdnt want a relationship and just wanted some fun. I'm single too and he knows I am the same, just wanting fun and nothing like that

 

He started seeing another girl and told me she wants something more and he used to always say he didnt know what to do as he only wanted sex with her and she didnt and we used to chat about it.

 

Then our convos got really intense and flirty. This is the bit Im not sure if its in my head or not or just bored at work and hes wanting to make it fun

 

But he started to compliment me a lot, joked about us hooking up, he asked me what my weird turn ons are and seemed really interested, he told me about his sex life, told me he has a huge dick, but all the while we never hung outside of work so it was always just when we were working together.

 

Then I got a new job in a different department. Before I left to go to the other job, someone in work decided to ask us all to the bar for drinks and he said no. When he found out I was going, he said yes and that hed come anyway. However hes a really sociable person and always drinking, but this time he didnt drink as he said he bad somewhere to be the next morning but still came over anyway and chatted to me the whole night and gave me a hug when he left.

 

Also once in work someone else was talking about friendly chat and flirting and he said in front of me "Even if someone flirts with you and they're joking, a little bit of them is serious" ...

 

Now that I've left the job, we don't see each other but we also dont text because we never have done. I have him on instagram and that's the only way we could actually message.

 

Since we weren't ever friends or hung out it seems weird to randomly message him out the blue and speak to him as hed know it was because I liked him. Because weve never spoke like that

 

I would love to start talking but I'm embarrassed that it was all just a random work thing that be found fun and that he has other people outside work he sees and would be awkward by my message or if hed be actually pleased and really interested to see me.

 

What would I even say because it's not like I want to even go on a date, I literally just want to hang out and maybe kiss and hook up, because I felt like when we were together it was hot, like our chats.

 

I just dont want him to be weird and think why is this person messaging me when I dont see her anymore because of work and have no interest? But at the same time I kind of want to just do it as it's not like I feel shy about it and dont really mind if he doesn't want to.

 

I dont want anything like a date so it's not like I am dreaming of being with him, I just really wanna hook up and not sure if he wants to

 

Could anyone give me advice and how to actually message him , or should I leave it? Dont want it to be awkward but also just want to go for it as I want to have fun but I'm just aware that he might be completely surprised and its in my head and not really what he wants which is what im asking

[Johnjohnson2017]

Text him after work. He might be excited to hear from you. Maybe he's thinking like you ie it might weird you out if he contacted you.

 

He was bold enough with his conversations with you at work, so he is attracted to you.

[Lotsgoingon]

Just say, "Since my work change, I don't see you these days. So, when are we going to hang out?"

 

If you want to take it up a notch, you can expand: "Since my work change, I don't see you these days. I miss our "talks." So, when are we going to hang out?"

 

Puts the ball in his court ... He'll get back to you.

 

You aren't making this up ... Yes, there are people who can flirt, and flirt quite graphically, without really wanting to do anything. But this guy showed up at your going-away party and stayed the entire time. He likes you.

 

Can't tell what he's feeling, but I will say guys know they have to be more cautious these days on hitting on women at work.

[d0nnivain]

Just tell him you miss chatting with him at work & you were wondering if it would be possible to hang out. When he replies yes, invite him over.

[preraph]

I'm just going to say it: That's an awfully long detailed question for someone who isn't emotionally invested. You're thinking it to death, and I do not believe you can just bang this guy without trying for more.

 

I mean, if all you really wanted was one-off sex or two-off or whatever, you wouldn't even CARE what he was thinking or if he's interested or worry about what if he's not and rejects you. You like him. You want him to like you back. It is what it is.